Dad and the kitchen

[maryanne3]

Me, my DH and our two pre school children have moved in with my parents while we look for a house. We have been there for a few months, and it has all been fine until my Dad got given a piece of freelance work to do ( he is retired, but does occasional bits of writing, but not needed for income). My DH is using the study as he is WFH, so Dad is using the kitchen table. Trouble is the kitchen is also where I make kids lunches etc. Today he stomped off in a huff because DH and I were having a chat there during lunchtime. AIBU that he could use the kitchen in the evenings when the kids are in bed and the kitchen is in use?

sorry, “kitchen not in use”.

It's his kitchen

Oh my god you’re ridiculous. It’s his kitchen, YOU are in the way and should be more considerate.

So your DH has taken over your dad's study and you have taken over your dad's kitchen - where is the man meant to do his work?

How about your DH goes into the office or takes the kitchen table?

Or maybe your husband could find somewhere else to work temporarily and let him use his own study in his own house.

Your husband needs to give him his study back and find somewhere else to work. Rent a workspace or go back to the office.

I think he should be entitled to use his own table in his own house as he has very kindly allowed you all to stay!

Seriously?

You are being unreasonable OP. Your Dad should have his study and your husband should use the kitchen table or better still, somewhere out of the house.

Sorry OP - but I agree with this

Your father is clearly at fault here, he and your mother should never have agreed to let you move in with them!

Your DH needs to give him back his study or share the study with him. You’re attitude is the problem!

Sounds like quite apart from the kitchen maybe he's had enough. Nothing worse than trying to write with distractions around. The fact that he's not doing it for income is highly irrelevant!
When can you move out?

I bet your parents are still in the main bedroom with you consigned to the spare room? Outrageous.

Give the man back his bloody study! Your DH can go in the shed. Alternatively, you can always make the kid's lunches earlier in the day.

You have literally taken over his house and disrupted his life for months. Give the poor chap his space.

It's his house.

Sorry - I know it must be really infuriating but you really cannot insist.

You and your family need to be the ones being more considerate. Don't chat in the kitchen when your DF is working. You can do that elsewhere. You can also ask when at time will be convenient for you to go in and make lunch for your DC. He is being kind offering you the use of his home so at the end of the day it is you who need to ft in with him.

It's his house. Your DH needs to go out and work somewhere out the house, and give him his study back.

Very rude to chat in the kitchen when he's working, go and chat in the study. I cannot comprehend of being so ungrateful and entitled to feel you can take over all of his private spaces and make them your own and then be rude about him when he feels put out.

So you have moved in, taken over the study space and now are basically telling him he can’t use the kitchen either to work because your need to have a conversation with your DH trumps his right to work and earn money on HIS own house

Come on, OP. Really? Are you having a laugh? Your dad is kindly letting you live with him, even more kindly letting your DH use his study, and you are now wanting to ban him from his kitchen according to your timetable. You are being seriously unreasonable. Be careful that you don't piss your dad off so much that he asks you to move out......

Sorry to pile on, OP, but in addition to agreeing with the comments above I find your remark that DF doesn’t nerd the money puzzling. I hope you aren’t suggesting that his work is less important for being freelance or financially unnecessary?

I cannot see the relevance of this statement to anything and it reads to me as if it is intended to sound vaguely demeaning - which to me it very much does not.

I'll bet your parents are counting the minutes until you and your husband's entitled attitudes move back out.

I think your Dh needs to give up the study for your dad to use and work in your bedroom. Or you need to be quiet in the kitchen. It is your dad’s house and he has been really generous to house you.

If DF had his study you lot could have the run of the house as you seem to think you already should!

Failing that, could you not make up a packed lunch the night before or at breakfast before everyone departs to work?