To not understand the Hull funeral directors story?

[GameOfJones]

I've just seen an update to the news story and it sounds absolutely terrible.

35 bodies now identified at the funeral directors, some of whom have relatives that believed they had already been cremated and had been given their ashes. It sounds so upsetting.

What I can't understand is what on Earth was going on? I sort of get they may have been taking the money to cremate bodies then not actually doing so.....but then what the heck were they planning to do with the bodies they had in storage?

One thing I wondered - and forgive me for sounding indelicate here - is whether it is cheaper to do a mass of bodies all at once. When I lose pets I never bother with the ashes after cremation because I understand they put a bunch of pets in together and give you a scoop of the combined ashes.

I'm not in the UK, but here the pet cremation places say that yes, they do cremate more than one at a time but they are in separate compartments so you do get your own pet's ashes back.

Not that it would bother me either way tbh.

I think it's because most of us lot are of Irish origin. Both sets of my GPs came over from Ireland so I have attended a few of these wakes. I expect the custom has died out somewhat as the second, third and so on generations of families take on English traditions and aren't as bothered about religion.

I remember the small male skeleton, and thinking how incongruous it was that he'd ended up in a school with children identifying his bones-
Did you go to school in West London?

A college I was at later had a beautiful Whippet skeleton in, 19th century, standing patiently in his glass and mahogany case in a perpetual ''show stack.''

{Dad died at home..and he looked very peaceful there, just asleep -immediately after passing -it was expected}

I was the only one to see Dad's body at the funeral home- a couple weeks later -Then, he looked ''Honestly dead'' - and very absent.
His soul had clearly left his body.

It was strange- it most definitely wasn't ''Dad''.

However.....Dad in life said ''For goodness sake, don't let them put makeup on me'' once I'm gone.

🤮

My mum had chosen for my dads ashes to be put in a cardboard tube. Then when I went to collect them, they put the tube into what was basically a wine bottle gift bag!

Cremating more than one body at a time in this circumstance wouldn’t make sense, because if they’d done that to save money how/why would there be bodies in storage still?

Crematorium staff would be able to see if more than one body was being cremated. There is a little window in the furnace, the coffin burns very quickly and the skeleton can then be seen. The crematorium I visited was so respectful, there were very strict protocols in place to ensure ashes were returned to the correct family member.
So unless the crematorium was involved in this too, there is no way the funeral directors could I get away with sending multiple bodies.
I can't believe what has happened, those poor families.

I agree with this. I lived in Hull until very recently and do actually know the family who owned the business very well, although I wouldn’t describe them as friends. I also lived around the corner from them. It is absolutely mind blowing, and I, along with others who know the 2 people involved, are incredulous considering how lovely he always appeared to be. (I won’t say his name, or his daughter’s, even though I know it has been out there in the media, the last thing anybody wants is risking an allegation of an unfair trial prejudicing the verdict)

Hull certainly is a very small city and if my experience is anything to go by, everybody knows somebody who has had their world torn apart by this, particularly in the west of the city and suburbs where his main trade was.

Whilst I can believe that it didn’t start out as a deliberate act (the criminal gangs suggestion is very unlikely, that isn’t really a ‘Hull thing’), they have committed the ultimate betrayal to mourners and friends, which is hurting the city right now.

The police appear to be doing a fantastic job in being so meticulous but I think it will be a good while yet before we get any real answers. I have a friend who isn’t expecting to find out what has happened to her husband’s ashes for months, if ever. This is heartbreaking.

If any good can come out of this, let’s hope it’s a proper, well regulated industry. At the moment, you have to jump through more hoops to open a kennels than a Funeral Home.

I think you may be confusing a traditional
wake where the deceased is present, I.e. they have been brought home for people to pay their respects before the funeral, and the get together after the funeral which I think most people have. Two very different things.

I remember the small male skeleton, and thinking how incongruous it was that he'd ended up in a school with children identifying his bones-
Did you go to school in West London?
oakleaffy God, no. I was at a grammar school in the North East in the early 70s.

How many small male Indian/Asian skeletons are in schools? {Albeit very old because of the amber colour of the bones}
An auction had an old human skull for sale the other day- ''Withdrawn'' probably on ethical grounds.

Edit: NOT on ethical grounds! there is another!
I can't link the photo on edit.

@katseyes7 Here is the antique skull for sale..

oakleaffy Oh my god. I can't believe that's even legal.

Shocking, isn't it. When does a human body part become ''acceptable'' as it's old?

Would you be able to recognise human ashes?

Horrible subject and I apologise in advance if it freaks people out, but I’ll tell you my experience. I collected my DH’s ashes and they were in a plastic bag inside a bog standard plastic container. We decanted them into a nice urn at which point they looked like rubble - some bits bigger than others. Over time they have dehydrated and gone more of a soil consistency. Not sure I’d recognise them as human ashes if I didn’t know it to be the case, to be honest.

We did this for our beloved Mog. If I remember rightly it cost around £200. We waited and collected them there and then. They were very kind. Would definitely recommend this if you can afford it. And I was of the same mind as yourself - thinking about direct cremation. Definitely not so sure now !!

Not legal for human cremation though - at least not in the UK. I think the cremators are only designed for one coffin at a time.

It’s like every family is different isn’t it!

I'm agreeing with that - I was just explaining to the poster about animal cremations, and how here at least you do get your own pet's ashes back.

I doubt humans would be cremated more than one at a time - the cremation people would realise. The whole thing sounds dreadful.

I realise that, I was just explaining to another poster about pet cremation here!