To not understand the Hull funeral directors story?

[GameOfJones]

I've just seen an update to the news story and it sounds absolutely terrible.

35 bodies now identified at the funeral directors, some of whom have relatives that believed they had already been cremated and had been given their ashes. It sounds so upsetting.

What I can't understand is what on Earth was going on? I sort of get they may have been taking the money to cremate bodies then not actually doing so.....but then what the heck were they planning to do with the bodies they had in storage?

Oh your poor friend. I hope it all gets resolved and she finds peace

I think they cremated some bodies but then shared out the ashes to several families who's loved one was kept at the funeral directors in storage.

I read the maritime branch were called in because of the stench from the bodies. Absolutely unthinkable.

You don't if it's a direct cremation often it's unattended as cheaper

Yes the article in the sun said this was why I believe

I had my first experience with death recently and actually I realised getting up close with their corpse wasn't freaky or creepy when it's your loved one. But when they'd embalmed and drawn makeup on her like a different person it was scary

I’ve no issue with the bodies of people who have died, and find they actually look quite ‘good’ the following day (the phrase ‘at peace’ comes to mind as a descriptor), but embalmed, nope, nope, nope. I’ve never seen an embalmed body that looks good, it’s always like some weird, empty, soulless waxwork of the person. I kissed one once (goodbye kiss on cheek) and will never forget it. Like weird waxy flakes combined with make up, and had to subtly wipe my lips before going to the loo and scrubbing them. Maybe it’s unusual and that’s not the case usually with embalmed bodies but I have never risked it again.

This is what I’m thinking - they got into financial/practical difficulties, tried to buy themselves some time by delaying the cremation of a couple of bodies, things spiralled out of control, and it became impossible to clear the backlog without admitting their neglect.

Is that a serious question? Of course they will be transported in a coffin in a dignified manner. A funeral home won’t allow people to take bodies like that in cars. I hope that was a joke question.

My dad looked good after being embalmed. I’m fact when all said he looked better than he did in years. Yes it’s got a waxy feel due to the chemicals and can feel a bit odd when you give your loved one a kiss but they are your beloved family member. The body can feel a bit empty, and for me that was a good thing as I really felt like I know my dad isn’t in this body anymore, he wasn’t religious but I knew his soul had departed from his body and that actually felt quite peaceful.

Why? To spend time with your loved ones body. It’s very normal in many cultures, not weird as hell. Many parents who have lost children bring their child home, let siblings spend some time with them. I personally totally understand why people do it and if my mum had allowed it I’ve had brought my dad home and spent the night before his funeral with the body at home. Obviously peacefully laid out in a coffin. In the US it’s very common to have open coffin funerals, and they have viewings before the funeral so all family and friends can come and say goodbye to the person. Some cultures are a bit squeamish about death, I think the ones who do this probably find much more sense of peace

Why would the cream workers notice if there were 2 bodies in the coffin, assuming they weren’t overweight? It’s not unusual for people to weigh 8 stone or less ( especially elderly frail ladies) and likewise it’s not unusual for people to weigh more than 16 stone. How would they know if there was 2 lighter bodies vs 1 heavier?

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I think they offered unattended cremations, so of course were not carrying them out, just taking the money, saying they did, and then giving someone else’s or some thing else’s ashes.

it was definitely another funeral director who visited and blew the whistle.

i suspect they started doing it to get some money, like i will cremate later when i clear my financials, and it simply snowballed.

its utterly heinous.

But what’s the plan there? The bodies will need sorting eventually!

Oops sorry @Mnhq cross posted,

It’s because they’re experts in retrieving and handling badly decomposed bodies.

I'd have been absolutely devastated if this happened to my cat never mind a loved relative. Surely all those uncooked bodies must have smelled terrible. How did it not get picked up.

Yes I think generally we are very squeamish about an open coffin in the UK (which is why that scene in Derry girls is so funny with the British boy not able to believe that the lid if off and the girls looking at him amazed - it's a funeral what did you expect?). Husbands relative , Liverpudlian and Catholic was in the front room , no lid and we all went in to see her before she went in the hearse.

I was given my Dad's ashes in a plastic container in a nice jute bag. We had the ashes scattered in the Garden of Remembrance with my mother's which he had saved for the purpose. I used the jute bag for shopping for years and it made me think of him every time I used it.

@Zanatdy Yes it’s got a waxy feel due to the chemicals and can feel a bit odd when you give your loved one a kiss but they are your beloved family member

See, at this point I don’t feel they are that person anymore. What you have in front of you is not ‘them’, anymore than a sack with their photo on would be. I’ve seen lots of deceased people (mainly via work,I’m not a weirdo that stalks random dead bodies🤣), but also family as I’m at the point where most have gone and I’m the next row marching forward. It’s really hard to describe, but in all cases ‘they’ are still there for a few days, and as I said tend to look their best the day after, even traumatic deaths and I’ve seen many of those. Then whoever they ‘are’ goes leaving a husk behind. From my experience, generally around day 3. I’ve no issue at all kissing the ‘husk’ (for want of a better term), as something that was the body of my beloved family member, even though it is not them now. But take the husk and make it some weird waxy thing with make up and it’s no more my beloved family member than a telegraph pole is.

Funerals are often weeks after a death now. I don't think o it's usual for people to be there at the closing of the coffin. But I may be wrong. Funeral practices in the UK are very different to Ireland.

That’s the feeling I’m getting too. People who didn’t know how to run a business and got themselves in to difficulties.

As an aside we had our cat cremated last year. We got her ashes back in a beautiful bag, like a gift bag, inside that was a matching box with her ashes in a tube inside. There was a certificate saying that she had had a single cremation and that the ashes were 100% hers. I’m amazed it doesn’t seem as involved as that for people!

You won’t say that when it’s your parent lying there. Sure I got the impression my dad had left that body know, but before was was just the person who raised me and adored me, not some weird waxy thing who might as well be a telegraph pole. Sensitivity isn’t your strong point is it?

I have family in Liverpool and they always have the open coffin at the house before the funeral. It was a shock at first but I expect it now.

Nope, it wasn't a joke question. In some cultures (which I hope aren't jokes to you), corpses are placed upright or in chairs. It's no less weird than bringing a corpse home anyway.