"You look too young to have kids"

[HT340]

People at work are always shocked when I say I have a 6 year old DC. Yesterday I was told "You look too young to have children". Previously, colleagues have said "I can't believe it" and were more surprised to hear of my DC's age.

I'm 32, so I do find these comments quite strange.

On top of the above, I find that my co-workers continually comment on my appearance - "you always look stylish", "you always look nice/well", "You're looking chic" etc. The other day, a female colleague looked at my face and then proceeded to say that her makeup skills are rubbish, again out of nowhere.

Bare in mind, I wear very minimal makeup up at work and by no means am I a fashionista. I have a simple and modest style.

As soon as I walk into the staff room, they all look at my body which makes me feel uncomfortable. This week a male colleague (who excessively compliments me) asked me out - again making things awkward.

AIBU to feel this is all too much?

🤣 Same.

Much needed virtual hug. Thanks sweetie. 😣

Exhausting. Considering leaving my job if I'm honest. 😰😓

How utterly terrible for you 🎻

I'm 32 so quite youthful looking still, I think?

Such a hard life 🎻

Beyond utterly terrible. 💔

Very very hard. I don't wish it upon my worst enemy. 😔

My DD is 32, I had her at 41, her oldest is 14, we had to see a consultant this week (for my DGD) DD asked me to come to maybe explain stuff (ex nurse) the consultant directed himself at me, showed me the scans. DD reckons he thought I was their mum!! All my childrens, grandkids lives I have been told how young I look. Bring it on.

One time, a few years ago, some random mum at the park mistook me for my dcs nanny (as in paid carer, not grandmother), when I told her I was actually their mum she said I looked far too polished and well-rested to be the mother of 2 small children. It was one of the best days of my life and I shall remember it always 😊.

Maybe you’re seen as confident and/or comfortable in your own skin at work that it adds to your looks.

People tend to gravitate to people who are or seem to be confident, happy and seem to know how to handle things.

I have had similar said to me when out with DC3 and it is assumed she is my first child.

In your case at work, I can understand why you would feel a bit uncomfortable with people staring at your body and even more inappropriate is your male colleague asking you out again which I wonder maybe is the crux of the matter.

Thank you for your comment.

I should probably just take the compliments and stop thinking too much into them.

I have a graduate and one at uni, and people don't believe how old I am (43) it happens a lot. It's not unusual. Not something I brag about 😂

existentialpain

I had my DC in my early 20's and people generally thought I was about 14/5. I got a lot of disapproving looks and comments.

I sympathise. People here might think it's a 'good' problem to have, but in my experience it was downright horrible at times dealing with people's perceptions of me.
A woman at the school was once chatting to me about my youngest. When I told her I had three older kids and how old they were she said ‘well you were a young mum, weren’t you’ in a real snotty way and then walked off. I was 26 when I had my first! She’s since realised I’m older and is now nice as pie. It’s so disappointing, I really feel for young mothers

I get the same when I tell people the age gap between my children - I'm 38 with a 17 and 3 year old. They always gasp and go "nooo, how, were you 12 when you had her?!" when I say I have an almost adult child 😂

I take it as a huge compliment given I'm only a year away from 40! 😀

It must be horrific for you 🙄

To quote Chandler, "Oh no! Two women love me! They're both gorgeous and sexy! My wallet's too small for my fifties, and my diamond shoes are too tight!"

I have a graduate and one at uni, and people don't believe how old I am (43) it happens a lot. It's not unusual. Not something I brag about 😂
And yet, here you are!

It is 💔

Maybe it's because you are an ex nurse you have more of an understanding of medical issues ?
I'm.an ex nurse too albeit mental health when my son was in intensive care last year the staff knew I had a a little knowledge so explained things to me in more depth

Well at least you are taking the comments in good humour 🤣

As soon as I walk into the staff room, they all look at my body

Yeah, right, of course they do

Nothing to do with natural human instinct of looking up to see who has opened the door / walked in, of course.

I'm partially blind in my right eye, so could not be seeing things well..🤓

Thanks to those who have posted genuine and useful comments.

Sounds like they are trying to be nice so just smile and say thank you, make a self deprecating joke so you don't come across as arrogant and then say something nice about them in return.