I don’t understand why people share

[ItsVeryHyacinthBucket]

Facebook profiles.

It’s a really psycho thing to do. Your name is not “Johnny-Beth”. You are not one merged identity, you’re two different people with different friends, interests, lives…

Some over lap obviously but that’s not the point of my post.

Just who does this? And why? Do you want us all to know how marvellously joined at the hip you are? Are you so suspicious of social media that you can’t maintain your own profile and need to share one to feel safe? In which case, why bother at all?

It makes me cringe when I see it.

YABU - sharing profiles makes sense for the time-poor and socially challenged
YANBU - only total weirdos do this

I added myself to my husbands facebook before I understood what it was all about. I thought it was like having an online address and we were both at the same address. Then I noticed that all of his friends were techies and would for some reason post paragraphs of what I think was programming code. So I got my own account and my husband never checked facebook anyway

I think it depends on how you use the app, if it's largely for keeping track of children's clubs and groups or messaging the parents of their child's friends (don't mist use WhatsApp now) or perhaps using it as a method for storing and sharing family photos with family then that's fairly normal and both parents know what's going on.

If a shared profile is used for personal things or random photos of their meals or being out on a Saturday night then it's very odd.

A family member of mine has a shared profile with their SO. So so weird and I never know exactly who I am receiving a reply from if I comment on their post. Another old friend had one with her now ex husband who turned out to be a massive arsehole who was cheating the whole time 🤔

Is it really any different to having a family insta account or whatever?

The only person I know who had this under the age of 60 was in an abusive and controlling relationship. It's a red flag when I come across it now in the groups I admin.

Ummm…what? Have you been on Mumsnet before? Have you been on AIBU before? Get a grip!

But this is weird too!

Interesting. Sorry to hear that. I wouldn’t presume it’s the case with the ones I’ve come across…

I have literally never seen this. It’s nauseating.

Even worse when people have an account for their baby or their pet and they actually post as if it's the baby or pet posting.

I'm not really on FB (have an account, never use it), but I've not seen this. If they're young, I might be surprised, but for older couples, I'd probably think one of them doesn't use FB, so the other set up an account for them to 'share', though only one of them is actively using it and the other is merely forced to look at and mumble about things their spouse or partner deems interesting.

terrribly judgemental and its up to them.

Someone I know husbands died so she put their profiles together, so busy being judgemental you didnt think of that one. 😥

I do get it with elderly people but beyond that I find it weird and co-dependent.

I worked with a man who had fb, let's call him Bryan. Let's call his wife Sarah.

Sarah 'didn't want fb' but I used to see her on his fb replying to friend's and signing the comment 'Sarah'.

Just get your own fb or text your friends to stay in touch, you don't 'need' to use your husband's facebook!

They are divorced now.

Some people just use Facebook as a communication method.
Once upon a time entire families would share the one and only house land line - oh the horror 😂😱

Neither would I at the time, they seemed really loved up and happy, were having a baby etc.

Even without the physical abuse I think it screams one partner being very controlling.

It’s so wet, like having a shared email address

I don't think a shared email is a problem.

My and my husband have our own email addresses but we also have a separate joint one for - bills, school notifications, events, tickets, travel, etc

It's for couples where one has cheated so they can still be on Facebook but full disclosure to the other one and also it's publicly warning off the affair partner or others.

Slight vicarious shock that all these couples are basically announcing to all that they don’t really trust each other, then!

I've only seen it in older couples who don't quite "get" social media. The generation of joint email addresses as someone said above.

exactly none of their business either, first world problems eh?

I think it's the same people who have an email signature in the form of 'Jane Smith (Mrs)'.

Yes. Have you? Usually the two options are
IABU, (implication being that you get it now) and IANBU (implication being you were right all along)
On both of your options you make out like there's something wrong with people who share. Therefore making it difficult to vote.

It’s not even a real problem, more of an irritant that could be easily ignored.

It’s a something to shrug at.

I know a hetro married couple in their 50s with one - I always thought it was weird.

Maybe they’re just not that into social media though - how refreshing!