People not showing pride in their homes

[Auburngal]

Talking about those who leave the front of their homes (owned) in a state.

For example there’s a house down my parents road who has an old fridge freezer on their driveway for 5 years! Don’t understand why people spend several hundred quid on white goods don’t buy them from a retailer who takes the old one for free or for £10. I paid the retailer £10 to take my old washer away and to recycle it accordingly.

Then there’s a house opposite me who had their bathroom replaced and left the old loo and other bits outside the home for several months. A decent bathroom fitter would take the old stuff away as part of the package.

Then another family down my parents road have old children’s toys in their garden- play house, sand pit etc. The kids are too old for these toys now.

Then are properties with hedges on the road and used as a ‘bin’. Unless the owners have mobility issues - then there’s no excuse to remove the rubbish from the hedge.

People spend hundreds of thousands of pounds on their homes but I hate it when they show no care.

People need to show pride.

I am a member of a community litter picking group.

A relative owns a cleaning business. One of her main jobs is to clean rentals before the end of the tenancy - the tenant, not the LL contact her. Somethings she can’t do such as removing a very old stain from carpet etc. Carpets are the biggest issue with LLs and letting agents that keep the deposit back.

Lives in a city with two unis and she works solid from May - early July in student digs

I thought this would be about bleaching your skirting boards or something and was ready to say YABU but I somewhat agree with you. I grew up poor and we might not have had a decorated house but it was always clean and my mum drummed into me that being clean and tidy costs nothing (not that it had much effect as I’m quite a slob, but even I’d draw the line at an old bog in my yard). That said, removal of white goods does cost money so there probably is a genuine case of not being able to afford having them taken away. The rubbish in the hedge yes, money (or lack of it) is not a barrier to going out and picking it up but poverty and mental health issues can go hand in hand and when you’re depressed you don’t care. I can see both sides.

YANBU I think it's just good old fashioned laziness.

I think it's cost. I looked at paying to tip my son's old mattress and it's £50.... it isn't outside and it's in condition and I did offer it for free but no takers. So I'll have to pay the cost. When you buy a new over etc you often have to pay to have the other recycled. Not everyone can afford it.

Also time and health is a factor. If they can't lift the items, maintain etc. I don't judge others as never know the circumstances.

Gardening I have no time for. I cut back to keep the hedge off the pavement to allow people to pass, but that it all I’m going to do. I certainly would never leave any litter or household goods in the garden for any longer than overnight for council uplift.

I don’t know the answer, but I think it most likely relates to mental/ physical issues in many cases but then becoming blind to the mess.

for example, when I watch things like “sort your life out” I’m astonished by people (especially with kids) who live in what I count to be basically squalid conditions (nowhere to sit, kitchen filthy, no working cooker, nowhere to eat, sleeping on or right next to piles of dirty laundry), but then live what appears to be a normal life in most respects, at least outside them home. Quite often they seem like nice people who also care about their kids too. Inside I’m thinking, why don’t the parents just get a load of black bin bags and boxes and work their way round each room individually but they don’t seem to be able to do this without help.

Some people also seem to have a mental health difficulty, which literally prevents them throwing things out, which I also think can’t help, and they just can’t get started. But I am from a background where people worked hard, did gardening, painting and DIY for themselves and sitting around in a messy house with the lawn not mowed (let alone a fridge in the garden) would have been considered appalling!

Some people don't share your values. It's odd that comes as such a shock to you.

Had a job to sell our last house, because of this. Other half of the semi,had weeds a foot high in the gutters, very professional jobs, she was manager in a top pharma. The other side, again professional job, rubbish,scrap iron whatever dumped in the front garden. Ironically, they both moved the year after us,semi downsizing, the other detached 4 beds. Have had similar problems,big gardens, which is what we wanted. Why buy a property with a large garden,if you obviously hate gardening,weeds, brambles, high trees,all encroaching into our garden.rubbish,old cars, white goods, windows not cleaned in 10 years. All in their 50s, no kids,lots of holidays, trips out, expensive weddings, dustbins in the front garden.

@Herdinggoats , people who rent don’t care?

Maybe they’d rather go on holiday than garden? Maybe they type of house they want happens to come with a big garden? Buying a garden and not caring for it is hardly a crime!

I’ve never had a bathroom or kitchen fitter take the old one away. I’ve just had a new kitchen fitted and it cost in excess of £150 to get the old one cleared. In fact, the last few bits have been sat in my front garden for a few weeks while I get around to doing some gardening to get that waste taken at the same time. I’m pretty sure none of my very nice neighbours could give a shiny shit.

You need a better scrap man, we put our old washing machine on the edge of the drive with some old furniture, a friend was coming with his van that morning. He got to our house and said where's the stuff you need moving? In less than an hour it had all gone!

YANBU, op, some people are just scruffy and lazy. I'm no domestic goddess but I cannot understand why anyone would want to live in a shit hole or have the front of their house looking like one!
And I massively judge people who leave their bins in the front garden because they can't be arsed to bring them round on binday.

I bet if you stuck a sign on that fridge freezer -

£50.00

It would be stolen by the end of the day!

No deposit scheme is going to deduct the tenant's deposit for the tenant having been messy during their tenancy. What is looked at is the state of the property at the end of the tenancy.

So your first sentence is very off putting.
I rent my home. Should I just leave it as a shit hole, then?

Some people have no money. Some are depressed and overwhelmed. Some have no money. Some simply do not care. You could always knock on their door and offer to take away the fridge?

We spend thousands. And it's never ours.
Still takes pride in it though.

Reading with interest. I struggle to understand, to grasp not having pride in your home.

Re the new build estates…….A lot of them have service charges and clauses built in when you buy which means you have to pay for them to do a lot of those things and you aren’t allowed to change your front garden without permission ect.

I'm not sure the people you describe do spend ££££ on their homes. It seems to depend on the area; I'm not seeing much of this in my village, but there are 2 or 3 properties like that as well. Probably health / mental health / financial reasons why they leave if like that. By the way, if builders take your old stuff, they get charged for it as commercial waste, which cost loads, so I guess many people ask them not to.

Every one of these households has a family with their own story. Their own mental health and physical health history, family history, financial circumstances, etc. You don't know anything about them. When you use "I" that's the problem. You say you wouldn't do it. Great. You're not them and have no idea why they haven't done it, so looking at it from an "I" perspective is fairly pointless.

I'm not saying it's great & that people should do it, but I don't understand why people care so much what others are doing. It looks unsightly yes, but so? Does your home? No. Then who cares?

This is why I have a garage. Old fridge, washing machine etc. in there, where they will stay until I get round to figuring out taking them to the dump (didn't buy new ones, so no delivery to take the old one away thanks)

Of course my hedges haven't been cut in about 5 years, but it's March now, so can't do that until September even if I wanted to.

We all use our limited resources where we want to use them don't we.

There's lots of things I put effort into that others don't - I don't go around questioning that though, I just assume they have different priorities.

I wonder if those who are disagreeing with you would genuinely be happy to live next door to a house which was an eyesore with scrap etc in the front garden?
This sort of behaviour shows a total lack of respect for neighbours and as well as ruining the look of the place for those already living there actually devalues your property and makes it harder to sell.
If I had seen properties like that in an area where I was viewing a house it would have put me right off.
Being a community litter picker is great, although a shame that it is needed.
A friend of mine also does this around the car parks and verges of the new forest where not only is the mess horrible to look at it can actually injure and kill the cows and ponies who roam here.

I have a full time job that often requires 12 hr days and a child, doing any work in or on the house is hard to squeeze in. Sometimes stuff gets put out on the front ready to be taken to the tip and has to wait a few weeks till that trip can happen, what with birthday parties and play dates and getting a weeks worth of housework and errands done over the 2 day weekend.

It's got nothing to do with how much pride I have in my house and everything to do with how many hours there are in the day and when services are open.

If any of my neighbours have excess time on their hands and are bothered by it then they're welcome to take my rubbish to the tip for me or weed the flower beds or trim the hedge.......