To not understand this (Mothers day)

[MaybeM]

Hello,

I'm not sure if I'm being unreasonable but there's been a lot of posts saying happy Mother's Day to soon to be mothers, mothers who have lost children, fur mothers whatever and that I understand and that it's inclusive to maybe people who have experienced loss or see their pets as babies or whatever really .. which is fair enough.

But then they say " to those who have chosen not to be mothers" I understand it if certain circumstances such as infertility had caused someone to make that choice but if someone is child free by choice (no complications just don't want kids) why would they want to be included in Mother's Day? (Apart from celebrating with their own mums obviously)

Am I missing something? I know in the grand scheme of things it's a non issue but I just don't get it.

I cant think of anything more pointless tbh, why give a mothers day card to a woman who doesnt want kids?

No, I don't get it either. Pointless nonsense.

I'm childfree and find it patronising. I don't need to be 'thought of' on mother's day.

Nor do I. I'm not a mother and by choice.

I think it's the "inclusivity" bollocks doing its work again - including people in a category they don't belong in.

I don’t know for certain but maybe if you are having a large family gathering it is so you don’t exclude one woman at the table. I was always hyper aware growing up of my aunt who when we would go out would be the only grown up lady on Mother’s Day who wouldn’t receive a card and flowers, my own mother and grandmother would both get gifts and it seemed quite sad that 2 of the grown up women were celebrated, and the third was supposed to just sit there and smile.

I don’t understanding either. If you don’t have kids you’re not a mother so why would someone be included in Mother’s Day, or even want to be?

It's all about inclusivity and diversity now.
Nobody is to be excluded.
PC gone mad.

I think businesses just play it really safe. The last thing they want is to be cancelled because someone with a chip on their shoulder decides to take offence at something.

Bonkers. Are they confusing it with International Women's Day, which was on Friday? Where I am, no-one seems to bother with Mother's Day but Women's Day is massive - everywhere you go you get a flower or a chocolate if you're female and over 18, and it's so much nicer because it there isn't the sadness Mother's Day inevitably has.

The gifts didn't need to be so publicly dispensed?!

I have no desire to be celebrated on Mother’s Day. But as a childless and single aunt I find through the year I spend a small fortune on gifts for family members and get very little back. Christmas for example I will by six sets of gifts and get 2 back, add in birthdays through the year, and I’m 12 to 4.
Add in Easter eggs for the kids, and additional bits and pieces through the year and I give so much more than I receive back. It was never meant to be transactional, but year after year it is wearing and sad.

Maybe in some families people like to take the opportunity to show gratitude to all women on this day, rather than just the mums.

I remember going to a restaurant years ago where each mum was given a glass of champagne on the house for Mother’s Day. The waitress brought over 4 glasses for the women on the table and my SIL said we only need 3, she’s not a mum. I was so embarrassed and hurt.

Categories exclude by their nature but with the inclusivity push people are frightened to exclude anyone. It’s silly.

It’s bullshit. I’m not a mother, I don’t need to be included in Mother’s Day!

This sort of applies to me, in that I have chosen not to be a mother. I'm gay and a Christian, I would have absolutely loved to have been a mother but that's never going to happen for me, so mothers day can be a bit painful in that respect.
Technically, I could get pregnant using a donor but that's not the right thing for me, so, in effect, I have chosen not to be a mum.

I think it’s fine really - it’s just wishing people a happy day today, whatever their situation. Is it important that people who are not mothers DON’T have a happy day today?

I usually get cross about all these type of things as well, but this doesn’t bother me.

I would put it in the category of saying “Happy Christmas” to a Muslim person - yes, it’s not their festival but there’s nothing wrong with wishing them a happy day too.

I didn’t get anything for Mothers’ Day from my children and I’m not bothered in the slightest. I did get something for my own Mum.

just don’t buy it then? But if it allows a member of a family to show kindness to another is it really that problematic?

People "in service" had the day off to go back to see their mothers and to their "mother church". Today used to be Mothering Sunday. Now it's the secular "Mother's Day" and people visit their mums.

If you are not "in service" not visiting your mother church, or your mum, why worry about whether you need to worry about it?

I would never expect a card or gift or acknowledgement or anything though - I'm just explaining why this might be included on a facebook/Instagram post.

It's pointless bullshit so someone who made a choice,doesn't feel left out.
It couldn't be more patronising

It’s all part of the woke, let’s not offend anyone, agenda. It’s utterly ridiculous, not to mention tedious.

Women’s day celebrates all women, maybe you should start celebrating that with your family. What your SIL did was mean though, I’d have just accepted the drink for everyone!

agreed, its pointless nonsense, we have womens day as someone said

I'm not actually sure anyone who is child free by choice wants to be included or feels they should be. I think it's probably a misguided attempt at inclusivity. So it's probably best not to get worked up that childfree people are trying to get in on mothers day. (I'm not saying you are worked up op).

I'm childfree by choice and in few no kids groups not a single person has ever said a thing about wanting to have mothers day for them. So I just don't think this is coming fm the child free people.

People are getting more and more ridiculous. I’m not a mother and will never be. I have a cat - she is not my fur baby, I’m not pet mummy. I have zero desire or wish to be included, definitely won’t be offended by the lack of acknowledgment...and acknowledgement of what?? Doesn’t make sense. I made a choice to not have a child. The second Sunday in March is just that....the second Sunday in March, no special celebration needed. In fact everyday is a celebration for me 😁

Your SIL was being a dick.