Posters you still think about

[Helfs]

Proof I probably spend too much time on here but does anyone else have posters they still think about every now and again?

Mine is the Australian poster whose son was in the abusive relationship and her many threads about helping him get out of the relationship and realizing she was toxic.

Can’t find the threads at all now but I hope her and her son are still doing well!

Does anyone else have stand out posters or threads that stick in their minds?

I don't know if she's already been mentioned but one that I think about frequently when I put my children to bed and is incredibly sad.

It started as a handhold as her young (maybe 3 years old?) daughter got rushed to hospital, I think with RCV or tonsillitis or similar. Her daughter was treated and came home and seemed to be getting better, then I believe maybe two days later the poster's husband went to wake up her daughter in the morning and she had passed away in the night.

I remember her saying that the paramedics had said she wouldn't have felt anything or known she was dying as she was found in a starfish position which meant it was just a peaceful passing.

I think about this a lot, and still cry about it sometimes. I always make sure the last thing I say to my children before I leave the room at night is 'I love you' just in case that's the last thing they hear, because of this poster's experience.

It was just so terribly sad.

Can't remember any of the details but there was a woman in Relationships who had a kind of hippieish vibe who was living in Portugal with some younger guy who sounded like a but of a cocklodger. Then a more appropriate man came onto the scene (solvent, closer to her age, responsible) and she couldn't figure out what to do. She had this kind of overly wordy purple passages style of writing I found quite entertaining. Anyone know who I mean?

About 20 years ago, when I was just nosey-parkering at MN because it had been on the news, there was a lady who was having a hard time with young kids and a DP struggling with his mental health. A few things she said made me think she came from my home town. I posted on one of these threads a few years later and someone knew her and said she was doing ok. I still think of her from time to time and hope she's ok.

The softball one I remember as it was one of the first I read. Weird friend who expected her to pay for everything. Think she had to go legal in the end so pulled the posts.

See, I think the reason that Anyfucker divides people is that for the right person, at the right time, her direct approach is just what they need and can be genuinely helpful (evidence on this thread).

But her approach doesn’t vary - horrible violent partner or once gave a colleague the gladeye - it’s all the same. Deaf to nuance, blunt bordering on unkind to vulnerable posters, and flavoured with the implication that if you don’t agree, you’re an idiot.

That was a thread among threads, wasn't it?

I know there are some here which are heartbreaking, and some which are heartening, but that thread was just brilliantly funny!

<hopes we are both thinking of the same crow lady>

We also used to talk privately then one day just didn't answer me. I really miss her when these threads come up too. I appreciated her support so much and my life has changed so much since we talked.

Somerville gave me hope again

KettrickenSmiled, which I remember as Kettricken is one of my favourite fictional characters (Robin Hobb)

I've been on here since 2003 so remember lots of these.

Of Onitlikecarbonnet (sp.) - many threads I've lost, but I'm vaguely sure she and hers are fully free and clear of the sod - yes, onit was an inspirational woman and my heart went out to her as she struggled against her disgusting, vile H. I hope she and her children are OK.

I often think of the girl - several pps have mentioned her - who wanted to leave her horribly controlling H but didn’t go through with it in the end. She had several threads and iirc the first one started when she just happened to mention that she didn’t always want to go to bed at a certain time - it emerged that her H insisted she went to bed at the same time as him and indeed did everything he told her to do, and she thought this was normal. Appalling.

I keep a watch on PurpleLampShades' threads and, like everyone, just wish I could do something to help her. If you’re reading this thread, Purple, a lot of people are thinking of you.

The thread that’s never left me is the woman who was married to a horrendously controlling man who kept tabs on her literally all the time - he would ring her up to check and expect her to ring him. She had to account for every minute of her day and wasn’t allowed money. He had some hotshot job, I think. And he was trying to get her pregnant - she had no autonomy. It was one of the most chilling things I’ve ever read on here. People were trying to help her get to a clinic to get a coil fitted. Would that have been the Lovely2012 that @Genderwoo mentioned? Sounds very similar.

I also remember a poster called Stratters or variations on that. I think she was banned but I can’t remember why.

I think about @witchesandwizards who was pretty much duped into moving to NZ with her kiwi husband, on the premise that he would be taking over the family business. Turned out that wasn’t remotely the case and the in laws were a bunch of dysfunctional alcoholics. Think she was thinking about separating and moving back to the UK, but wasn’t able to take her kids with her. Wonder what happened in the end as they stopped posting, hope they are in a much better place now.

I can't quite remember their user name but @chopin something or other. The MIL of Lobster Boy and how much her daughter was bewitched (aka emotionally and coercively controlled) by him.

@dottypencilcase update here x

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/4887355-at-chopinandchampagne-at-chopinanchampagne?page=2&reply=133141929

I think the daughter may have been called Wyatt. Desperately sad and yes I remember that. I wonder how the family are doing.

but I'm vaguely sure she and hers are fully free and clear of the sod - yes, onit was an inspirational woman and my heart went out to her as she struggled against her disgusting, vile H. I hope she and her children are OK

Onit posted recently and her and the children are doing well and are happy.

She’s still with the partner she met after she had serrated from the vile ex.

I was going to say Pamela! Such a brave, inspiring lady

I'm the chutney chunt survivor! Still around and post occasionally, but thankfully my life is pretty settled and uninteresting now.

All is well, DS starts secondary school in September. Haven't seen Chunt since we got divorced, he was looking very red faced and stressed in court back then! He used to send DS bday/Xmas cards (always late), but that stopped about 5 years ago.

I remember lots of lovely people from that time and am hugely grateful for the amazing support, advice and camaraderie I got on here. 😊

Welshlass (not sure if that’s the right name) and the titzilla posts, I hope she broke loose of that ‘friendship’

And so many on the feminist board targeted by activists. Thebewilderness, langcleg, baracker to mention a tiny fraction of articulate and passionate posters

One where a woman was trapped in her home by her controlling husband who had installed cameras. She managed to find a blind spot and planned her escape with her young son. Her sister was to pick her up when he was away or at work I'm not sure.

The thing I always remember is that she said when she awoke her son and told him they were leaving he said "this is the day I have dreamed of". She updated shortly after to say she was safe and away. I often think of her and how brave she was and hope they're living a good life.

Chickencuddle 😞

The lady who was in an abusive relationship with some City wa*ker who treated her & DC appallingly. She felt really bad for wanting to leave the lovely house and wonderful holidays and felt super guilty he was working such long hours to provide a lifestyle he wanted. She was buying clothes off eBay and getting into debt to get things for the DC. Took her a while to accept she was in a gilded cage. Her mum was a hippy and had never got on with the H and had wanted her to marry a juggler or someone who just made her happy 😊

Oh, and “He made me eat paper”.

Awful, awful men abusing these poor women.

Langcleg and Baracker were banned by MN, which was truly shameful given that they were posting about safeguarding children.

I remember years ago there was a poster maybe south sea or something who’s waters has broken very early while she was abroad..

everyone referred to the baby as pebble and I was pregnant at the time and really invested in her story. It was the one that drew me in to MN.

I was going to say the same. Her little boy passed away holding a Go Jetters figure 💔 I think of them whenever my DC watch go Jetters. So sad, I do hope she is doing okay