Car regret - AIBU

[misskellyb]

I am aware that right now I'll probably get bashed for seeming like a spoilt brat. But I've got bloody car regret.

I just sold my Range Rover Evoque. I'd had it 5 years. I absolutely loved the car for its height and size and all the standard features that came with the car. However, my insurance had gone up drastically at the time of renewal due to the increase in thefts of range rovers and it felt unjustifiable to pay it. It had also been having some problems recently too. And I also no longer needed a diesel. It wasn't doing the car any good with mainly city driving and I was sick of the dpf warning light coming on every month and having to pointlessly drive for miles to clear it!

Whilst the evoque was in a garage having a repair - not dpf related this time - and I was without a car, on a whim I decided to car shop and out of desperation I purchased a new car so I could be back on the road asap.

I've gone for a used ŠKODA Karoq. It is absolutely lovely. So much car for the money. And is a like for like on specification of previous cars I’ve owned. And is a petrol which is absolutely better suited for the minimal miles I cover these days. I checked the ncap score before I purchased which is 5 stars. However, in the time I've been driving around in it I feel so low on the road compared to my evoque and other suvs I have owned, and feel I just made a quick decision without thinking it through. Whenever I park up next to other suvs I panic at the thought of ever having an accident in the ŠKODA and start imagining one of those bigger cars doing some damage. I'm aware how ridiculous I sound but I do suffer with anxiety and ended up down a rabbit hole when I checked the ncap score in more detail and even though it scores 5 stars, the child protection on a Karoq is slightly lower than other suvs and even smaller hatchbacks I’ve owned in my younger years. The Karoq is roughly 79% while others are at 85% and above. I typically in recent years have gone for suv style cars for their size, height and feeling more protected and I’ve come to love crossover and suv vehicles on the whole.

I've had a Nissan qashqui before and a rav4 and I parked up next to a qashqui today and it looked huge and higher in comparison and just instantly regretted not getting another quashqui as I equally loved my qashqui - it was just a tad small in the boot.

I am aware I sound absolutely ridiculous and spoilt. I am extremely grateful to be in a position to be able to drive and have a car - one that I love too (Karoq) - but I can’t shake off the feeling of worry that my children are less protected in this car than other cars I’ve owned in the past, which is stealing the enjoyment from the car.

The kids love the car and were so excited to pick it up. But every time I put them in it I just feel guilty thinking what if something bad happened? I’d blame myself for being so quick to jump without searching for the safest car possible for our family.

Please talk me down from my stupidity. Surely I am being unreasonable here? Any ŠKODA Karoq owners here who can share some positive stories so that I can start enjoying our new car and not feeling anxious and regretful every time I drive us somewhere in it.

TIA

I think after driving an evoque that does feel sturdy it's difficult to adjust to a car that might feel more 'tinny' if you know what I mean. I'm sure the car is safe though and it will just take some getting used to.

Also I dont think many cars would stand a chance next to the huge SUVs in a serious accident. Just make sure if they're young you have the best car seats you can afford and that's really all you can do other than driving carefully.

You'll adjust to it

Being worried about the damage larger cars might do to you is rancid. Do you ever worry about the damage your car might cause to someone driving something smaller?

Any ŠKODA Karoq owners here who can share some positive stories so that I can start enjoying our new car

I don't think many people have much to tell about their cars in terms of positive stories. If they like that car they like it but that won't make any difference to your liking it.

You are being ridiculous.

Bigger does not mean safer and it's less safe for pedestrians and other road users. If you drive sensibly then your chances of being in a serious accident are low.

And it's not like you're driving an old Metro or something. The Karoq is a really nice car!

https://www.carwow.co.uk/skoda/karoq#gref

I’m sorry but there is something about your post which is really off.
Do you ever worry about the damage your car might cause to a smaller car? And yes most cars will be smaller. I’m not sure if you are projecting your anxieties on a car but it does all ready very selfish and “me me me” in my massive car which is now still big but not the biggest one on the road so I feel very vulnerable 🤔

Not the same experience for sure.
If you must keep the new car (for sensible reasons, but you shouldn't keep it if you don't like it as much as your previous car), reframe the potential accident situation in your mind based around your anxiety and what you're already thinking.
In the bigger car, you would cause more damage to other road users. If that doesn't create any anxiety, go with a bigger car.

We have a Mazda 2 and Peugeot 3008 at home, both petrol manuals. I drive both but I prefer the Mazda, it’s so easy to drive. I’ve never self unsafe in it.

@jimmyhill

Yes actually I do and was relieved that the car has a pedestrian protection braking system and forward collision detection. So if I was to run in to a pedestrian or another vehicle from head on, the car will brake itself after a warning to tell me I am too close to another car/person if that makes sense. I am an incredibly sensible driver and always have been so I feel even without having that extra function on the ŠKODA that I am a reasonably safe driver when it comes to others. I get that accidents can happen regardless of how safe you are, but to answer your question, yes it crosses my mind. But my post isn't about that.

Anxiety is absolutely rubbish.

If you want safety don't buy an SUV

OP

Look up 'Euroncap'

re crash/safety ratings!!

The newer the car, more often than not, the safer it is.

So google the safety of car you may want to by

We always look up the safety of cars

We have a seat Ateca (basically the same car)
It is much safer than the old Range Rover (full size) we also have...

you will be fine!

@Pancakeorcrepe

See my previous reply to other poster as it will answer your first question.

I think my anxieties are more on somebody hitting us, not me hitting them. Because I know I am a safe driver and the car has some excellent features to automatically brake if I was to get too close to another driver. It's more the kind of lunatics that are on the road, pulling out at junctions or driving too close to the back of the car.

The post is 100% not me me me - I am not a car snob by any means. I've owned 'luxury' vehicles Audis, Range rovers, but also owned seats, Nissan, Toyota and can honestly say the badge does nothing for me. Yes I do believe my anxiety is projecting in to the car. Not that I am upset because my car isn't the biggest. I really love the car.

I think you are focussing far too much on a perceived 6% safety difference.

I come from the horsey/countryside world and we just LAUGH & LAUGH at the numpties who drive Range Rovers - POS, basically.
I have been driving a ŠKODA Yeti for 10 years as I need it to tow a horse trailer & up to 1100kg of horses. Brilliant, and probably a third of the price of a LR, many of which have a very limited towing capacity.
Skoda is part of VW, so you get VW engineering for a reduced price as it is not a prestige brand.
Girlie, I suggest you actually learn something about vehicles, not just whether they are pretty.

@Geebray possibly - just got panicked when one element was described as 'weak' in the child protection! This is what anxiety does to a person - fixate on tiny little details.

Tbh crash tests aren’t that realistic. They are only relevant if someone hits you / you hit someone in the exact way that it says in the test. An inch off the same line and the results can vary wildly between models.

for example if you take a 98-11 New Beetle and a 12-18 Beetle and crash them head on, the newer one will come out better. But if you do an overlap head on (which is more likely) then it’s actually the older one which fairs better.

Also the NCAP standards change. What is as a 5 star car 20yrs ago would probably score quite badly now as technology has moved on so much and the ‘pass rates’ have changed.

@Moanranger

Did you read my post in full?

I didn't buy a Range Rover because it was pretty. I also aren't worried about my ŠKODA because it is a ŠKODA. Truthfully, if I wanted to buy another Range Rover, I could have. I chose not to because I am not going to justify a car needing constant repairs or increasing insurance because it is branded 'luxury'. I am also aware of the VW Audi seat and ŠKODA group. And I feel privileged to be able to own a car on the whole regardless of its status and badge.

In a totally honest answer - visually hands down I love the ŠKODA appearance far more than my Range Rover anyway. This is not my concern.

My post is specifying my concerns about safety because I suffer with anxiety and have fixated myself on worry after reading the ncap score - Not appearance or status. I did expect somebody to call me out on owning a Range Rover, so much so I nearly didn't specify what the previous car was because that doesn't matter.

@ClockworkDisaster thank you, these are the kinds of answers I was hoping for to ease me of my anxiety and concerns. Not those who think I'm upset because I don't have the biggest and best car lol.

Useful information for me to bare in mind. Thanks very much.

@akkakk

Thank you for the comparison with regards to safety of a newer ateca and an older Range Rover it puts my mind at ease.

How old are your children op? If they’re under 6/7 and not in a rear facing car seat then the differences in car is probably totally meaningless. Rear facing is approx 5x safer than forward facing, and you can get seats that rear face up to about 36kg.

are you getting help for your anxiety?

@Branster

I want to keep my new car. I don't want to dash out and buy a bigger car purely because I am anxious. Anxiety is horrendous and causes the sufferer to avoid situations purely because they are anxious. If I was to go buy a bigger car tomorrow it would be a decision based on anxiety and my anxiety would win. I love this new car and want to enjoy it without anxiety stealing the pleasure of it.

Also I'll reiterate regarding other road users: this ŠKODA has a braking system that will avoid a potential collision head on. So if I was to hit another road user or pedestrian it would brake after giving me warning messages to tell me I am about to crash. So I do have less concerns about the damage I could cause to another road user because the safety for other road users is fantastic on this car. It's just the score is lower for child protection. That's my worry. That's not to say that it couldn't happen - me hitting someone else - but combine the cars features with myself as a sensible driver, the chances of me causing damage to anyone else is reasonably low. My concern is more if someone hit me such as pulling out or driving too close from behind - because there are so many careless drivers about and that is what makes me feel vulnerable, if one of those careless drivers happens to be driving a bigger car, what could they possibly do to my children in my car. That mixed with already suffering anxiety has prompted the post.

@Excited101 one is rear facing.

The ncap test is based on a 6 and 10 year old in a car seat. That's where the score came from.

Yes and no - started sertraline but haven't been able to attend CBT unfortunately. My previous counsellor went on sick leave and new counsellor couldn't fit me in at suitable hours. I need to explore it again for sure.

Girlie 🫢