Mental health support at Uni - social sports clubs would help not just for elite players

[Neapolitanicecream]

Hello all my YP is struggling with loneliness at a Uni that was considered top last year !!!! A lot of the clubs are on paper only so it looks good on someone CV 🤔

her cousin at a very sporty uni is thriving at a midlands uni renowned for sports, (so he thought he wouldn’t get into any clubs) but the uni have inter-houses social football…. Brilliant idea to support YP mental health.

please please so called top unis with amazing sports facilities please introduce social sports and not just for the elite

Getting OUT into community provision! Getting put into it is just what they shouldn't expect...

Yep.

At mine sports teams, clubs and societies are all run by the students and students union so not the business of the university itself.

We have fun/friendly inter college sports activities as well as the bigger national teams and all of that is facilitated by the SU and college exec teams.

Ultimately the university is a business, it has the 'top class' facilities but has no real involvement in who/how they are being used as long as the right people are being paid.

The glossy brochure will mainly focus on education and careers, which is what the university is there to deliver, along with support for said education.

Lots of students are enjoying the sports facilities, just not your child. There will be plenty to get involved in that isn't competitive sport if they give it a go. I'm sorry your kid is lonely but this is the right time for them to take charge of their life and make the best of their time at university. No one is going to step in and individually curate their social life.

I'm not unsympathetic. My own nephew nearly dropped out of college because he hadn't found a tribe. His parents weren't ringing the dean to ask them to arrange a Friday night kickabout. He's just turned a corner in the last month by getting into jiu jitsu and making friends that way.

i think that there is the uni experience dream sold to them for a top uni, that really is not there for all and I despair of the accommodation is no social area just a cramped kitchen. Such a pity really considering the costs of it all. Ie v.expensive for very poor accommodation and poor quality uni experience

But how is the teaching? The library and learning resources? The labs and equipment? The careers service? The connections to employers and industry? That's the experience the fees are covering.

Uni is viewed as a place/time to have a lot of fun but it's not a holiday-camp-finishing-school combo that your thread is focusing on.

I think most of the clubs at university are social - they will cater for all abilities. It probably depends on the club, eg a running club will probably be less competitive than an athletics club and if you do something like korfball or climbing it will be about the social side as much as the activity itself.

It's also worth looking at parkruns if your dc can get out of bed for 9am on a Saturday (mine won't :) )

But that’s the thing it is I heard good things about social fun at Nottingham and Loughborough they manage to have top teaching and the social sports for all !!! If they can do it why can’t the so called top uni ??

it just helps get everyone involved and a friendly atmosphere

I work at a uni, ours has a lot of social sport though. Seems odd that a university wouldn’t.

Which one is it?

Uni worker here & we offer a very high standard of diverse support for student mental health. Some of this involves fitness/sport offerings accessible through various routes inc student counselling. It seems that you're quite dismissive of that though. Has your child even explored that option?

At uni the onus is on the adult students to arrange their own social clubs, I think.

Most Student Unions have an officer to help students set a club or society up, so they could do that.

I agree with what @rbe78 and @rachelvbwho said.
'Universities' don't run teams, clubs and societies, the students do.

I'm pretty surprised to hear of any University that doesn't have several levels of sports teams. My dd is currently at quite a small University, not particularly known for sports and she was saying there are 7 men's football teams.

I’m soooo disappointed as is YP not to have got into any of the sports teams (they were very sporty at school) but the teams only interested in semi pro players Well, didn't he ask about these things when you looked round ?

and I despair of the accommodation is no social area just a cramped kitchen. Such a pity really considering the costs of it all. Ie v.expensive for very poor accommodation and poor quality uni experience

Again, didn't you view them, and ask students who were there, when you were on the tours ?

You are right OP. I think I can guess the uni you refer to, and I have a DC at another top uni that doesn't boast top sporting facilities (sold them all off and/or closed them all down due to costs - super, thanks) but is also utterly appalling at mental health support (6 sessions of counselling for the ENTIRE time the student is at university, DC's uni department routinely ignore the support statement and student disability services have no power over the department and are barely able to interact with it). So I emphasise about that horrific feeling of being alone with a desperately unhappy DC living away from home at only 18 yo with no friends and an uninterested uni.

The sports clubs are like that because the uni gives financial subsidies to very sporty students and has to show that throwing money at students and giving them dispensations on the academic timescales/engagement front etc simply because they are good at sport is worthwhile in terms of winning competitions/raised profile etc.

I think you would like the uni to be more interested and supportive of your DC in their mental health, rather than simply setting up a social club for them, so the criticism you are getting is a bit unfair. You need to be raising concerns about your DC's mental health with student support services.

If I have guessed the uni correctly, there is a uni social local walks club on Sundays that is quite low stakes I believe. I would guess community involvement is a bit tricky due to location, but probably there are possibilities if your DC likes animals.

The campaign to make universities have a duty of care for their students would go a long way to making universities more supportive of students' mental health. Sadly, Bristol university have made this essential duty of care take a lot longer to introduce than would have been the case if they had not appealed against it. Universities have 18 yo teenagers living away from home in their accommodation and paying a lot of money for their courses, but the duty of care is currently less than an employer would have if the 18 yo were in employment. The big ones are too big to care and don't have the facilities for mental health support that they should be legally obliged to provide. Departments and faculties should have a legal duty of care not to make students' mental health worse by not providing reasonable adjustments or being obstructive or just careless about reasonable adjustments.

Please can everyone sign petitions and ask MPs to support the move to make universities have a duty of care towards their students.

Which uni is it ?

It would help if we knew

Recommend lesser known sports for social stuff and welcoming beginners. Ultimate frisbee v inclusive, in my DC's experience.

I am surprised there's no social sport at all - most students' unions are very good at setting this up and many have sports reps etc who can help with set up costs etc.

Which uni is it? Have you looked at the student union page to see what's on offer?

The bottom line OP is that Universities run as businesses and they all have different "selling" points which they will stress in order to attract students. I'm generalising of course, but on the whole the establishments that find it easiest to fill their courses on their academic reputation alone don't need to be as concerned about the student experience as those who might need to work a bit harder to fill places.
I do sympathise. I know it is a worry when a student is slow to settle, that 18 or 19 doesn't really feel very grown up when it's your own child and that it can be difficult for them to be proactive when mental health is not great. But I think you need to encourage your DD to make the most of what is available rather than being upset about what she feels is missing. I know my DS found the change from school which was pretty much staff led to University where he needed to be a lot more self directed quite a challenge at first. As I said upthread his University does have good pastoral care but he still had to learn that he had to go and ask for any support he needed and to push himself out of his comfort zone to join in things - nobody was going to invite him.
There will be other people like your DD at the University and there must be something she can get involved with surely, either within the University or in the community? You've mentioned football a few times. If that is her thing, is there a grassroots women's football team within reasonable travelling distance - it's so popular right now there seem to be clubs popping up everywhere. Chances are they'd love to have another enthusiastic young player joining them.
I know it is hard for young people who are not naturally outgoing but it's not boarding school - things aren't always organised for them and students don't need anyone's permission to leave their "cells" as you said in a previous post. They are bright, able, young adults and, difficult though it can be, they need to work through these issues themselves. To be honest, I wouldn't be surprised if the University refuse to talk to you, as your DD is the "customer" not you, and she is over 18. In your shoes I think I would be focusing trying to support your DD to make practical steps to improve her situation, or if you think things are too bad then looking into more major things like changing accomodation or even moving University.
I don't want to sound unsympathetic but I think you will be banging your head against a brick wall as whilst there are no doubt some very caring individual staff members it is unlikely that "the University" as an entity will be particularly receptive to your concerns. I'm not saying that's right, but it is currently the way things are, and your energy is probably better directed elsewhere.

Definitely get them looking for community based clubs. When I played netball we always welcomed uni students into our team when they were about. I even gave lifts to some. There will be local leagues / opportunities they can get involved with. It also helps them build a support network that doesn’t just consist of other students.

I don't understand why you think it's the responsibility of the university to offer mental health support to your daughter, rather than that of the NHS via the GP. The university is an educational institution, not a health provider.

I don't mean that to sound unsympathetic, as it's very clear that there's very little assistance available to people of whatever age who have mental health issues. That's shocking and frightening. Ultimately, though, a university is never going to be the main provider of any kind of health assistance. The problem is the lack of adequate help available via the NHS.

It can be difficult though to get people joining in if they're not team standard.

I played tennis, and the actual club you had to get onto the squad, which gave you access to the university courts and practice sessions. The practice sessions would have around 20 people regularly.

But I tried to organise a social just turn up for anyone group for a term (summer) and was lucky if we got three people, which was hopeless. Lots of people told me they were keen and would come, just never did.

@itsnotallfunandgames

exactly spot on the “duty of care” at the uni is less than if they were in employment at 18yrs. Yet some simple steps could enhance mental health, so why not. Clearly money making machines, yes they do need to be enticed out of their cells for their own benefit.

lessons from previous years should be learnt to benefit all

OP if your DC needs better counselling that the uni can't provide, they can also self-refer to the local mental health team. The uni medical centre might have the right number or just google it.

However, the university's own services will manage the waiting list based on urgency, so you should assess the urgency of your DC's mental health and if necessary any urgency should be communicated (any urgent cases will be seen quite quickly).

Aside from Bristol university's appeal so that universities have no legal duty of care to their students (shame on that university in particular, and all other universities that think it is right for universities not to have any duty of care to the young adults living in their accommodation and paying for their courses), I do believe that universities were told to have one named parent/guardian/other adult that could be communicated with directly by the university, although I know that my DC's university have not set this up yet. However, the student disability service at my DC's crap-for-mental-health money-obsessed university allow the DC to give permission for the student disability service to talk directly to a parent. If your DC gave this permission, you could raise your concerns directly with them.

Sorry you and your DC are going through this. There was a brief bit of media interest in high levels of loneliness among university students last year (it was even on the Jeremy Vine radio show) but it doesn't get nearly enough coverage or attention. Students are dropping out of university due to loneliness, and there are even worse outcomes.

How awful to think that at any university there are probably hundreds of lonely students feeling stuck in their rooms because social spaces like kitchens, lounges, sports clubs etc are dominated by the extroverted or elite.

Maybe your DC could try the student social club for their course/department, if there is one?

You are right that mental health is greatly helped by a bit of fresh air and exercise. It shouldn't be/feel so hard for a YP to access at a sports-focussed uni.

@itsnotallfunandgames

thankyou for getting it. Yes I talking about prevention of mental health issues as has been proven the social sports gives you, as advertised by said Uni !!!! With the great facilities
So things don’t escalate to needing mental health treatment/support due to isolation

OP sorry your YP is going through this. I hope you find a resolution.

I actually think too high expectations are placed on uni social life.

If someone isn't naturally a joiner, or introverted, or their face doesn't fit (or not white or ND or circumstances are they've accidentally joined an unpleasant houseshare or year group) the whole thing often can be fairly strenuous experience.

There's a lot of adults who are doing incredibly well career and life wise who hardly engaged with "uni social life".

Of course some people meet their partners or friend group for life. Especially if they're super extroverted.

But a lot don't. Or they get on the graduate job path and start making money and that's when their life takes off. Not everyone enjoys a houseshare environment!

I'd say focus on the basics rather than trying to force social things. Especially as I assume they're on student loans.

Get the good degree, put work into the next career move, don't overspend, don't get into drama, stay healthy, learn basic housekeeping, see it as a means to an end.

They may meet people naturally so enjoy those ad-hoc interactions.

Like pps say, there should be some activity or environment they can just drop into for a cup of tea and a chat. Chaplaincy can be good for this.

But if they don't easily find a friendly group, then I wouldn't force things or spend ages looking for the right one. It doesn't make their uni experience inferior to anyone else's.

Most people lose touch. No one gives a shit if you had the most fun parties in your first year.

If they.get their degree, get on the graduate career path and stay healthy that's all that matters.

If they've got a full week of classes that should take up enough time.

Maybe you could sub them Netflix or something. Or pay for a monthly gym membership. Something to ease things a bit.

But I wouldn't overthink the social stuff

(obviously if they're specifically being bullied then that's another situation. But not finding their tribe isn't an immediate worry).

Yeah- I think the issue is that everyone wants to do it…. in theory…. on their own terms and when they’re not too busy, but no one wants to organise it and no one wants to commit to turning up regularly. You do need some sort of commitment to get even a social kick about going. You can see why it gets annoying when you organise a social game but then you get six people flake on the day.

Collegiate universities have more social sport because it generally is a formal league- it’s not just random social games- Cambridge has an inter college league and “cuppers” which is a knock out but it’s all student run and organised. The college “management” aren’t involved at all.

OP I’d advise your dd to join a town team. I live in a Uni town and loads of students play in the local women’s netball league and for the local rugby clubs, either because they didn’t make thre cut for the Uni team, or they didn’t like the culture or the training schedule doesn’t work with their course commitments.

@TrouseredTed

yes agree there is a high expectation of the uni life, I feel sad for them not finding their tribe. It’s just an expensive experience!!! They did think about a Saturday job.