Approaching 40… looking back what advice would you give?

[Cloud44]

Soon to be 40, and feeling like I want to make some changes to try and be my healthiest self. I’m really not looking forward to being péri menopausal / going through the menopause. Is it as bad as you hear?! If you are past your 40s what advice would you give looking back?

Get into a routine with exercise now, find something you enjoy, then make it a priority in your life.
Get down to a good weight now, and maintain it.
Read up about HRT now and decide if it’s something you want. If it is, don’t wait until you’re on your knees before you start it.
Write a will.

Exercise as often as you can, lose weight if you need to, take supplements, start strength training, cut out all alcohol.

Enjoy being 40 and the next few years . Do not spend the next few years dreading menopause .

Talk to your mum about her own experience of menopause and when it happened - that should give you a clue on your own likely age .

Sort out your diet and your exercise regime now . Get good sleep and minimise alcohol.

Research menopause symptoms so you know what changes might be relevant . I started with flooding and night sweats which I didn’t realise was the start until much later . There is much more info out there now than there was even just 5 years ago . Then just enjoy life . Don’t put off any life experiences.

Many people do want / need HRT . I haven’t taken it and feel better now I’m menopausal than I did throughout peri . So for me it’s not been that bad.

I’ve lost a couple of friends to cancer since turning 40 . You only get one life so enjoy it .

I agree about keeping a healthy weight and exercising, I love Pilates and yoga. Don't give up tasty food and alcohol though, everything in moderation. Life is short and if you fancy that piece of cake or glass of wine go for it, just don't eat the whole cake in one sitting!
Do you have youngish children? If so, start planning for the future when they're young adults and don't need you so much anymore - write that bucket list for days out, weekends away, holidays, socialising. I'm nearly 50 and honestly, in some ways, even though I loved the 'little' years, life is so much better now, and I feel like 'me' again rather than 'mum'. (And even if you don't have kids write that bucket list anyway!)
I sometimes think people worry too much about turning 40/50/60. Just enjoy life as much as you can and stop thinking about how 'old' you are. You're only as old as you feel!

I’ve lost a couple of friends to cancer since turning 40 . You only get one life so enjoy it .

Yes, and adding this to my post. So true.

I'm 43. Sure I would like to be doing all these things mentioned by PP, but the truth is I'm not. I don't do any formal exercise, I do housework and gardening and a bit of walking if the opportunity presents. I am overweight, I drink a little too much wine and my diet could be better. I am perimenopausal, but ok, aside from an increase in migraines.

I know lots of people will want to take the healthy approach and I applaud them for that. I think I have been too many people dying early and having been doing all those things, that I really just want to enjoy everything I enjoy before it's too late. Not saying it's the right approach, just my approach right now.

So I guess my advice is take time for you, prioritise what you want, stop pleasing others and doing what's expected and grow old disgracefully.

If you need to, lose weight. In my experience I have noticed a huge correlation between being overweight and experiencing menopause symptoms.

Ditch my husband sooner TBH.

And stop colouring/bleaching my hair.

Get a dog, go to pilates, take time to smell the roses.

That's interesting. Is that just among people you know?

To not sunbthe.

Take cod liver oil supplements.
Buy a good, rechargeable hand fan.
If you’re overweight, try and cut back a little bit. Your knees will thank you.
Research HRT and if your GP fobs you off, ask for a second opinion.
This is the age where things start going wrong unless you’re really lucky, so get your paperwork organised, get a will written, make sure you keep up with your friends and enjoy your life as much as you can.

Great advice here.

Has anyone taken the NHS health check which is available from age 40?

Was it any good?

This is all very sound. I'm in my 50s now trying to shift the weight I started to put on at 40....it would have been easier not to put it on.

Keep up with your friends...you'll need them.

Start something new.

Get a dog.

Keenly following.

I echo all of this.

My peri and menopause were nowhere near as bad as some women's and I haven't had HRT. Don't spend time dreading it because for some women, it's really not bad - a friend didn't notice anything except cessation of periods!

Live each moment- the years after 40 have flown by for me.

My mum went through it at 43 and says she didn't even notice the menopause, just that her period stopped. She's 67 and still a size 10 so not all woman are affected by the symptoms. I definitely wouldn't spend time worrying just in case.
Just like not all women get period pains or morning sickness but some do, it depends on the person.

My mother in law said she didn't experience any symptoms either, my father in laws raised eyebrows said it all....

I'd say 40 is nothing. Just do what you like. Maybe at 50 then we can talk...

Get a pension.
Get private health insurance if you can afford it. Beneden if not.
Do some yoga and weight bearing
exercises
Look after your skin and teeth as well as your body

I’m 42, I agree with loving life to the full, I also have had a few friends in their 40’s diagnosed with cancer and am going through a cancer scare myself (hopefully I get the all clear), I’m also peri menopausal, it’s not that awful other than be angry and people a lot 😬. I exercise every day, mainly for my mental health. I enjoy being single, have made new friends, got new hobbies and hopefully will get a dog soon. I try and eat healthy but I also don’t let it take over my life ‘if you want the cake, eat the cake, life’s too short’.

so my advice…

Enjoy life.
Try new things.
Put yourself out there to make new friends.
Don't take any sh#t from anyone, don’t be afraid to say ‘no to cheeky f#ckers.
Exercise/keep active.
Don’t stress over menopause.
know your body, check your boobs, don’t put all health changes down to menopause.

Do the things you love - spend time with family, loved ones, travel, whatever floats your boat. Because life is short and you don't know what's round the corner. I wish I'd spent more time with the people I've lost in the last decade (I'm 50) than I did.

Exercise - get into a good routine and include strength work. Your 50 plus self with thank you.

Look at your nutrition - do you have a health diet and is there enough protein and fibre in it? Do you have weight to lose - if so, start working out what sustainable changes you should make today.

Arm yourself with knowledge about peri menopause, know what symptoms to watch out for and what treatments are available. Understand the potential benefits of HRT. I wish I'd been better educated and started HRT 5 years earlier. You don't have to fear it, but take advantage of the greater awareness and understand their is now.

Look at your alcohol intake - if it's too high, start trying to cut it down. It gets harder for your body to process!

If it's your bag, look at your skincare regime and what might be worth changing as you get older.

My 40s were great btw, there's lot to look forward to - especially giving a few less fucks about some things!

I’ve read that fat produces oestrogen, so it contributes to hormones being unbalanced. But I guess like most hormone things it effects some people and not others.

But I’d agree, get your weight under control because the older you get the harder it is to lose weight.

Cultivate an inner calm - there isn’t much that really matters. Will it matter in 10 years time? No? Then don’t worry about it too much.

Look after your body, your joints. These age quickly, more than you imagine. And any old injuries will bother you if you haven't sorted them.

Mobility is not to be sniffed at.

This is food for thought. I’m just 40 and I believe my Mum went through menopause in her early 40s (she is no longer with us to ask). I started flooding and having horrific PMS 4 years ago after my second child was born. I went on the pill and all those issues stopped. I wonder if that was menopause related. Hmm off to do some reading.