Security guard following me

[ColourMeBlue]

I am probably overthinking this, but here goes-i have shopped at my local supermarket for 20 years.Everytime there is a new security guard,I get followed.Without fail .Yesterday there was a new security guard.As soon as I walked in,she walked passed me and brushed into my arm.I imagine this was for me to make sure she had clocked me.When I paid she walked down to the till and stood at the end of the till glaring,and I mean GLARING at me.It was enough to put me off what I was doing.I know everyone will say if you are not shoplifting you have nothing to worry about,but that doesn't warrant me being followed every single time.What would others do?say something?leave it go?email a complaint?I'm so annoyed and a little upset today.She really was intimating.

Well, it being because of racism would be my immediate response to @TeabySea ’s friend who is also followed.

Well if her behaviour pisses off other staff members, hopefully it will make her rethink her tactics.

I would definitely want to know why this happens. They clearly have you flagged up for some reason. I would ask the manager. Maybe they have you mistaken for someone else. Do you look like a famous shoplifter?

Yes, sadly it seems to be the case. I'm a very pale white. My friend and I often joke that we look like a couple of chess pieces out for the day.

Even when we had lunch together someone at the table next to us was staring at friend. She doesn't look like a celebrity, we weren't being loud, she doesn't have a disability with tics or anything that might draw attention in terms of movement or sound, and she didn't have a large mobility aid with her.
Admittedly friend is gorgeous with beautiful locs so maybe it was that.

I can’t believe all the “she’s just doing her job” replies. Standing way too close and standing at the till glaring at the customer isn’t OK.

So someone stands so close to you that you can "feel the breath on your neck", why on earth aren't you turning round and speaking to them. If someone was stood that close while I was paying, I'd be worried they were trying to look at my pin to be honest.

is it Aldi? I always feel like a criminal in Aldi so avoid shopping there. I've never stolen anything in my life (except maybe a chocolate mouse in Woolies circa 1983)

This is what’s so stupid. They let male thieves who steal high value items go, because “it would be dangerous to confront them”. At the same time they’ll follow a woman around endlessly even though she’s been in the store hundreds of times and never stolen anything. So it looks like they’re Doing Their Job, but they are achieving nothing apart from annoying ordinary women doing the food shopping.

There was another thread about this, and someone said that in a local shop (Tesco Express I think) a group of men came in regularly and walked out with bottles of alcohol. The staff said they’d been told to let them. If the retailers can’t get their act together to target the real thieves instead of tailing women buying food, this charade will continue and they’ll continue to lose money.

Yes I don't understand a lot of this. I hear them say on the news that shoplifters aren't confronted and can just walk out with the goods. I once walked out with something still tagged...I had paid, the cashier forgot to remove the tah. The security guard stood in the way of the door....so yes it seems like what they are saying is men can steal and women will be confronted. Easy pickings

Yep. Without doubt.

The Sainsbury's security guard follows me everywhere every single time.
I'm a regular and all the staff know me.
It got so bad I had to report him to the management as he was so close he was making me feel uncomfortable.

My bi-racial son has been held back on every single flight he’s made, or stopped by door security in pubs, while his white mates sail through. I’m looking forward to the day I’m with him when this happens.

My local Tesco's it's always the Asian or black security guards that give me the most issues. Even tho I am brown myself - They seem to ignore everyone else and follow me and my kids around (whom are babies/toddlers) they only ease up when they see me paying. I guess they are stuck where they are in life for a reason. Tossers.

Do you look like a famous shoplifter?

Wynona Ryder🤣

It was always my fantasy to, if that ever happened to me, turn to them, say hi and say if you're going to be following me anyway, would you mind holding this/pushing this, and hand them my basket or trolley or items I'm holding.

@ohdamnitjanet it's disgraceful and I'd definitely call them out on it, otherwise how else will they learn.

Why don't you just ask? It's really bizarre

I hated this happening as a teen, the cocky insinuation that we only didn't steal because of them. The following got so bad we used to pretend to steal just to wind them up

Give over. Not every shoplifter is someone fallen on hard times, they're stealing because they can, they want to, or they are stealing to order.

@Efemail If I’m ever there when it happens I most certainly will. Of course he very rarely says anything because it makes it worse, the one time he did, the second time by the same person, it ended up in an almighty row and he wasn’t allowed in. It is disgraceful. He’s also the only one in a white group ( who often look pretty dodgy quite honestly ) that gets his bag searched at festivals. His mates could take industrial loads of drugs in if they so desired, while my son gets searched.

I've had a similar problem recently. I've shopped at my same local shop for the five years I've lived here. Know all the staff really well as they were my link to the outside world during covid. Last August they hired a new security guard and he followed me up and down every single aisle every time I went in. If I went up an aisle he would too. If I stopped he would too, if I skipped he would too. I asked the other guard who I get on with well if I was acting suspicious and and he said no. I had my baby in October and went in looking for maternity pads and he was stood next to me watching. I made a complaint about him eventually as he was walking so close behind me I stopped suddenly and he walked into me, they said he's hired by an outside team but gave me their details. I made a complaint, they investigated, apologised and he hasn't followed me since. After Christmas he was to busy following me he missed to young girls stealing mini wine bottles which I reported! Definitely speak up! If you've shopped there for 20 odd years and the staff know you then hopefully they can reassure you

I was going to ask this - I had an experience in my local one where I had walked in with a bunch of flowers from M&S went to buy one thing for supper which they didn't have and so walked out again. Security guard insisted that I had nicked the flowers despite my pointing out the M&S logo on the packaging and called the manager when I insisted (who was very apologetic).

@Puzzledandpissedoff You've just reminded me that driving back from Europe last year, we got stopped three times at the border on the return to the UK, it was ridiculous. I am a greying, completely boring late 40s woman so hardly eye catching! My husband was sat in the back playing games with our son, maybe the fact I appeared to be on my own looked unusual too.

Our local Aldi and Lidl stores don't even have security guards. Where on earth is this lawless place?