Aibu to not get up early?

[LateRiserLazyCow]

In my late 40s, kids left the nest, and have realised that I'm just not a morning person!
During covid lockdown my body clock seemed to find its own rhythm and I found myself going to bed around 1-2am and waking around 9 or 10am. I'm lucky that after struggling with working early mornings for years I've been able to find a job starting later in the day.
This is all good but I get alot of stick from people for supposedly being 'lazy' because I'm not up at bloody 6am like them. Constantly exclaiming horror at me still being in bed when they've been up for hours!
Why are they so judgemental! You live your life and stop judging me for living mine...

I'm not a morning lark, or a night owl. I'm very much in exhausted pigeon category.

I like being up early, before anyone else to have a cuppa in peace. But I also hate being up early as I rarely sleep well so am always exhausted. I'm happier if I've woken early naturally as opposed to HAVING to be up early for school/work

Equally by 9pm I'm dead on my feet and my eyes are stinging so I go to bed and read for a bit until the eyes are too sore to stay open. But then lay there tossing and turning whilst my brain plays up and refuses to let me sleep.

Ah yes. The mooning people aka better people. The once at the office at 6am that cannot understand how we pathetic lazy people drag ourselves to work in the middle of the day. Totally irrelevant that they fuck off at 2pm and we stay till 5pm. I was jnder the impression we all had 24h in day but somehow we are wasting it? Sleeping in on the weekend. Again, I staying in bed after 7am the full day is ruined. And then obviously staying up late means you're lazy aswell. But sleeping at 8pm means you're productive

When DS2 has left home I will absolutely work more to your timings.
As it stands, me being a night owl yet still needing to get up for DS2 means I'm just darn tired.
I do work full time, but we are an international group so it's very flexible.

I do have the odd lie in when I can and after waking at 7am or so, will make a cuppa and then go back to sleep for a few glorious hours. I don't give a fig if anyone thinks I'm lazy, because I am not.

I'm more likely to go for a run at 10pm than 7am. I used to love the 9-10pm swim session but they haven't reinstated it since Covid.

Uhmm, 7am IS insanely early. I think you are officially a lark.

People will judge you whatever you do.

I go to bed at 9-10pm and get up at 5-6am.

People judge me/ make comments because I struggle to stay up late because it's just not my routine. I go home quite early these days if I'm out for an evening.

It really doesn't matter. Just do you. Who cares?

Given half the chance this would be me. Even with early(ish) starts I still stay up late. It's actually 1 am right now and I am due to start work at 8.30 am. Working from home so all I need to do is roll out of bed and throw some clothes on, at least.

I much prefer getting things done late in the day. I wind down 7-9 pm and then I get inspired to do stuff.... and don't get to bed until around 1-2 am.

I'm working towards being self employed - when I get there I will probably have 1 or 2 normal start days and sleep in the other days and stay up late.

Im a morning person (up at 6am in the week, usually around 7am at the weekend - out of choice as kids are old enought to entertain themselves). I love getting up early, especially if its a sunny day. There is no way my body wouldn’t naturally want to get up early and get out on a sunny day.

I wouldn’t judge you for it though and as you said, you’ve found a pattern and a job that suits you better. The only time it would possibly be a problem is if you had arranged to meet friends for a day out or going away for the weekend. As long as you were flexible with others (as I think most people do prefer to get off to places early), then it isn’t a problem.

I never used to be a morning person, then I started running and decided I prefer it in the mornings when it’s quieter and now I seem to be stuck in that position. I get up about 5.30/6ish and get so much more done in those few hours before work. I’m generally pretty lethargic in the evenings so having a work out first thing works for me. My bf on the other hand is totally the other way, he would rather do a 9/10am-2/3am day as he is better in the evening. Sometimes it is a bit pants to be going to bed/ getting up at separate times so we make a effort to meet in the middle some nights but mostly we stick to our natural patterns. It means I get time to do my own thing whilst he sleeps and same for him 😀 I certainly don’t think he is lazy though, he can stay awake and get stuff done long after I’m a zombie for the evening so he’s equally productive. The ‘morning is morally better’ idea just seems odd to me.

I'm a morning person. Can't help getting up early and I'm more productive in the morning and get loads done. I'm tired in the afternoons and don't achieve a lot.
So no one is productive all the time. It doesn't matter what hours suit you as long as it doesn't keep anyone else awake. For example I'm very very quiet sneaking out of the house early in the morning.

I love this.

It's not a problem so long as you adapt to my way of doing things when we're together.

Do you not think that maybe you could adapt to your friends' preferred approach occasionally or compromise and meet in the middle?

A while ago, I saw a poster say that anything past 7:30 is a lie in

Ofcourse if its lunch or something like that, absolutely.

But if you’re going for a day out somewhere - shopping for example - most shops open roughly 9-5 or a day out looking round a city. Most attractions are only open for certain hours in the day and I wouldn’t want to miss getting the most out of the day.

Yes everyone is different and the OP has found a good solution for her, but most of the world is up and awake during daylight hours, sleeping during the dark.

I'm the same as you. Always been a night owl but work and kids forced me up by 7am for years. Now I try to get up by 830 but more often than not it's between 9 and 10. I do have fibromyalgia now and osteoarthritis but at only 51 I do feel guilty x

But you're still going by your definition of getting the best of the day. Sure, there is the occasional thing that requires an early start and being there at opening time but most things don't. A day's shopping - most shop's are open until 5.30 or 6, many are open until 7. Starting shopping at 11 will generally give you more than enough time to get the shopping done. I think most people would get fed up of shopping after 5 or 6 hours anyway.

Attractions - yes, some require an early start but generally you only need a couple of hours to see them. If you're away for a weekend, a relatively relaxed breakfast at 9. Out the door at 10, 10.30. Check out an attraction or two and then check out what is offered in the evening. I really don't want to be on the go from attraction to attraction from 9am until 6pm and then back to the hotel, dinner and bed.

If you were going away for a weekend with friends (everyone working in the week), I would want to be out of the door and on our way by 9am. I think most people would. Same with a day out. Leaving at 11am or later would make me feel like ive wasted the day.

And same as enjoying a hotel breakfast (love that part of a weekend away). They usually run from around 7-10am. Some of the comments on here suggest it would be impossible for some people to get downstairs for a hotel breakfast, even with a 3 hour window.

I appreciate not everyone is a morning person and OP has adapted her life to fit her (and thats great). But I do think the majority of the population are geared up to getting up earlier than 10/11 and going to bed earlier than 1am or 2am (which is the middle of the night for most people).

It is for some people. I'm one of those. I very very rarely sleep in past 7.30am. I find it very difficult.

Reminds me of the threads about what time it is appropriate to make noise. Those people commenting were defo morning people. And very eye-opening what others consider appropriate.

^ totally agree.

OP if it works for you then carry on!
I work with a load of "early birds" if I log in at 9am I get a chorus of Good Afternoons!
But they all log off at 4pm and I'm frequently still working past 5pm and only one available after 4 to deal with anything that needs resolving quickly which seems to go unnoticed- funny enough not many urgent issues arise before 9am .

I wish I had thought to address it when I chose my career! My 8am starts are a killer. Just counting down the years til retirement now... Only 20ish to go 😂

@ShiveringMeTimbers my sight is hopeless in bright sunshine. Fine at night even with headlights unless they are those that beam to mars. Better without a torch ironically!
j suspect your theory might hold water!!

And I disagree completely that most people would want to be out the door at 9am on a weekend away. I think most people like to do things a bit more leisurely when away for a week end and a military style up and out at the crack of dawn would ruin the weekend for me.

I remember one time when my kids were young I was away for a few days with one of them at a training camp for his sport. Parents made the meals etc. One parent had us all up the first morning an hour before breakfast so "we could get ready". Ready consisted of putting bowls, spoons, cereal and milk on the table.

All the other parents moaned to one another but said nothing to her so she presumably she thought they were all OK with it. I told her not to call me the following morning. By day 3 most of the other parents had told her the same...

I do think though that we are likely to attract and be attracted to like minded people and even if we have friends with a different approach to life we generally have enough sense to go away with like minded people. I have friends I would never go away with for a weekend despite getting on brilliantly with them normally. They would feel the same way about me.

This shows why compatibility is so important when traveling with friends. I would not want to be out the door 9am. Sure if there was a reaosn to but to just go around. Nope. If the breakfast is at 10am then I'd be waking up up 9.25 to go downstairs for breakfast. On the otherhand I enjoy sitting at the lobby bar/room at midnight and enjoying a drink. I think the thing that separated morning/night people is the "wasted day" mentality.

I'm with you. Am WFH and don't wake until 8am now. It's great but yes, even when I didn't work and had to get DC to primary I'd get the competitive parenting chats about how busy everyone else was. Tiring to listen to and boring! Half of the time I just wanted to ask them why they were telling me that they were clearly miserable on a daily basis and not changing anything at all.

@LateRiserLazyCow unfortunately many older people don’t sleep well any more, me being one of them. That’s why you see them out and about so early.

I’ve always been more of a night owl forced into a morning lark lifestyle by kids and jobs. Now that I’m older and don’t have to get up early, I can’t bloody well sleep!!

My DH got up at 4am for 20+ years and just retired. He is managing to stay in bed till 7 some days now, but he’s unlikely to get much later than that.

@Rewis we have a whole group of people we won’t go on holidays with because they want to be up for breakfast and on the trot right away!

Even though DH is an early riser, when he’s having a break he doesn’t want to be on the move early.

We are definitely “late breakfast” one activity per day people.