Was I BU to leave the pub after being told off by the manager?

[EmptyTheFrickingBins]

I had booked a table for a group of seven people to celebrate a Ruby wedding anniversary. On arrival to the pub we found the table with our reservation and sat down to wait for the rest of party - this was at 4:30 which was our booked time.

Three other guests were already seated at the table and there was no indication that any other table had been reserved for us.

My parents - who are both elderly and disabled - arrived and I returned to the table with them where we asked the other guests if they'd be happy to share-- there would have been room and we couldn't move because the only free tables were for four or under. This was at 4:45 and we had been waiting for them to finish.

They reacted in a very angry way and stormed off from the table and must have informed the staff on the way out.

I just want to be clear - at no point where we rude or demanding.

We were viewing the menu when a manager in a pink top came over to the table and told us rudely that we shouldn't have asked the other guests to move (again - at no point did we do this), that another table had been reserved for us and we should have spoken to the staff - again none of this was indicated, and only the one table had our name on it!

I felt extremely embarrassed by the interaction - we sat at the table in good faith as it had the reserved sign on with our name.

The woman's attitude was awful and spoiled the night - we ended up leaving because we no longer felt welcome - everyone was looking at us as she told us off!

Why didn't you go to the staff and ask where your table was? That would be the normal thing to do.

Not just plonk yourself down next to randoms.

Also YABU for going to a hungry horse, they serve microwaved dog food basically.

Your reaction was unusual but hardly criminal.

Employees shouldn't tell you off! They can explain without embarrassing you.

I wouldn't have left. You let it get to you a bit. Maybe you didn't feel confident approaching staff to start with? Hope you got to celebrate somewhere else

I think the the 3 people getting angry sitting at a table for 10, which was clearly reserved, were rude. Sounds like the OP asked politely to sit at the other end of it. This wasn't rude to ask in a busy pub, even if the table hadn't been reserved.

@EmptyTheFrickingBins

Genuinely don't know what's wrong with sitting St the table with our name on it!

Sitting down at a table where people were already sitting finishing a meal is an extremely passive aggressive thing to do. Even if you asked them politely. Even if they smiled when they said yes.

So where you don't feel like you forced them off because you were nice about it, you absolutely did, and they were right to be angry about your behaviour, however instead of complaining to you THEY OPENED THEIR MOUTHS SPOKE TO THE STAFF...as you should have done in the first place.

In this instance I would have asked a member of staff, I wouldn’t have just sat down while other people were still sitting there, even though there was a reserved sign with your name on. Staff must have ok’d these people to sit at the table, therefore it was up to them to sort it out.

Then you would have been sat at the wrong table too.

Staff shouldn't have been rude, but I think OP is leaving chunks of info out

YABU. You ask a staff member about your reservation. You don't just go and sit with people already there. Its rude.

You are acting as if they purposely stayed late at the table to spite you but you don't know that- maybe their reserved table was late to become free and they literally only just finished their meal. It's not like the second you put your fork down on your final bite you start rushing up to get your things together to leave.

Sorry but you were rude.

In all places that we've made a reservation in, we've arrived and sought a member of staff to let them know we're there. I wouldn't think of trying to find "our" table because sometimes the venue wants to move you to a different one. Fitting the customers to the tables is their job, not ours.

And, I dunno, I'm British and would rather die on the spot than sit at a table with strangers in that way. They might be lovely and humorous people but I wouldn't want to take the risk that they'd just start eyeballing me for sitting with them (because that would be weird and bad form).

However I don't think Hungry Horse have done themselves any favours here, because I don't think it's acceptable that OP's party was standing around for fifteen minutes without staff taking an interest in what was going on. Obviously OP should have approached staff when she arrived, but even when she didn't, staff should have spotted them standing around like lemons staring at some people sitting chatting. That's not good service.

It may have had your name on it, but other people were sitting there, so it wasn’t yet your table to claim! Imagine it from the other people’s point of view? Whatever the rights and wrongs, it was for the staff to sort out, so best to have asked them before sitting down at what, at the time was in fact somebody else’s table, because somebody else was sitting there!

Maybe the 3 people knew another table had been set up for OP's party and the reservation was no longer valid because they actually spoke to the waiting staff? I would have been seriously p**ed off if a large party joined my table (outnumbering us) when I had just finished eating. I have seen people ask to join a table in a busy pub when everyone is just drinking (not a large group though) and there are no spare tables, I have never seen anyone do it in a dining area when people are eating. And I am not 100% sure how polite the OP actually was

I'm a pub manager and can categorically say I would not have behaved the way the one you encounter did.

In my last pub (I'm better contracts right now) we used to put the reservations on tables and people would move them. So I do wonder if this is what happened here.

All the manager needed to do was be polite and explain that. I don't blame you for walking out and I would feedback to the company.

Such unreasonable and clueless behaviour. Is this the first time you have been to a restaurant, "hungry horse" or otherwise?

if you’d reserved a table and some people were sat at it, why didn’t you speak to the staff.
so weird. You were rude.

also- the service level you’re expecting from HH is possibly at odds with the reality of such an establishment.

That is very odd behaviour OP. I’m surprised that nobody in your party insisted on asking a staff member first. I thought it was just basic etiquette?

You should have spoken to a member of staff. Your attitude is quite entitled.

Oh dear @EmptyTheFrickingBins

You were wrong.

If you have a reservation and other people are sitting there, it's up to you to speak to the staff.

It doesn't matter whether the other diners have finished their food. They were entitled to stay in the restaurant as long as they wanted.

The mistake was the management who put them on 'your' table.

I've never known reservations having a name on them.
Usually, it's just a RESERVED sign on the table.

IF those people sat there and expected to be finished by 4.30, then again, the staff should have intervened and spoken to them.

This might happen if a pub/cafe was really busy- the staff would allow someone to sit at a reserved table but insist they left by (eg) 4.15 to get the table ready for you.

However, you were out of order.

The woman's attitude was awful and spoiled the night - we ended up leaving because we no longer felt welcome - everyone was looking at us as she told us off!

So you didn't have your meal at all and just left?

What a way to treat your elderly parents.

I think you could benefit from a 'social skills' course of some kind.

As soon as you saw people were eating at the table with your name on, you should have spoken to the staff.
You were being ridiculous to sit with them!!!

Have to agree with the majority. Etiquette says you ask staff.

And your question is relevant because ... ?

The OP and her party displayed very poor manners when she and her party rudely barged in on those dining at the table.

Pink top or not, the manager was correct in pointing this out. Unfortunately, the OP is unlikely to acknowledge what is said here and re-evaluate the habits of a lifetime.

You desperately wanted to get your children out of the way, and your disabled parents needed to sit down so quickly you waited for 15 minutes while people at "your table" finished their meal? Aye of course you did. Meanwhile in the real world, it would have taken 2 minutes to speak to a member of staff and have them sort it out. I can't believe you emailed them about this tbh. The manager will have a good old chuckle on a Monday morning at least anyway. Who even eats at HH anyway the food is fucking grim.

Why? They'd been seated there by the staff, we're not informed guests gad arrived and then find them sitting at the table.

It could've been handled so much better.

You sat down with people you don't know while they were still eating?? Why didn't you speak to the staff first? Such an odd thing to do. Yabu

Is anyone else thinking of Fawlty Towers?

”Would you mind moving to that table, in the middle of your meal? This is Lord Melbury’s table, he always sits here.”
”I tell you, breakfast is finished, bye bye please, bye bye.”
”I’m sorry but you’ll have to go. We made a mistake, all these rooms are taken.”
”No, this is table five.”