AIBU...want to catch up with some I met over 10 years agoo

[ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees]

Hi, I want to understand if I'm being weird or unreasonable and see what people think.

I meet a man about 10 years ago. We went on two dates. Didn't even kiss and he has to move country for work shortly after.

We kept in contact, occasional calls, texts initially but it died out. When he returned, he contacted me out of the blue and let me know he was back. He suggested coffee but I had a lot going on at the time so it didn't happen. He moved again a few months later but only 2 hours away.

We still keep in touch birthdays, Christmas but not in regular contact.

There wasn't any initial physical attraction and I don't see him like that but I never clicked with someone as much on my life. So much in common, great conversation, on the same page with do many thing. Some of the best conversations of my life. He's kind, intelligent, very funny. It was like we had known each other for years. We both thought so.

I really think we could had an excellent friendship and he says the same. I would love to catch up with him regularly. We are both extremely respectful to partners so I guess that's why we haven't.

I have a partner of 2 plus years. He is a fantastic guy and we are considering moving in together soon. Definitely the best relationship I've ever had and I've never really had a bad one.

He knows about the first guy. Nothing kept secret at all. He has no problem with me meeting him.

I was thinking of calling him and arranging a catch up? How do I even go about it? I don't want a romantic relationship. I have just never clicked with someone so much before.

Any thoughts?

Would you say this if it was a woman friend? As a woman in a male dominated career I have lots of male friends and a couple I have very close relationships with. Why does everything have to come down to sex ?
Also if she was gay would you say she shouldn't have female friends?

I was going to say something very similar. If you've not been in such constant contact, things may have changed a bit, and the conversations may not be as engaging or fulfilling as you are hoping.
However, nothing to lose, so perhaps see how he feels about meeting up and take it from there.

It sounds like an emotional affair except you've taken what you know of this guy and filled in the gaps and made him perfect and become infatuated.
It's not real, if you're feeling there's a hole to fill in your relationship then there's a reason for that.