National Trust visit spoilt by overzealous staff or AIBU?

[Sunshineismyfavourite]

Visited a beautiful NT country house today. Huge 17th century house with Capability Brown landscaped parkland. The house has lots of art by Van Dyck - one of my favourite artists and I was really looking forward to spending a couple of hours with DH wandering around in the beautiful spaces enjoying the peace and quiet. However, every time I stopped to look at a painting one of the staff would come up to me and start talking. This happened several times in every room we wandered into. I totally get the enthusiasm and expertise of the staff but I wasn't really interested in hearing about the Civil War etc., I just wanted to enjoy the paintings in peace. We do visit NT properties occasionally but have never found this to be a problem before.
The staff just seemed to be unable to read my body language as I was trying to walk away or indicate that I didn't want to talk or listen to them by not responding or engaging with them. Short of telling them to shut up it was impossible.
It was a very quiet day with not many visitors so they were probably bored but it was way too much for us.
AIBU by being a miserable bugger (I know I'm quite unsociable at times) or should I be allowed to wander round in peace? Perhaps they should give out 'don't talk to me' badges with the tickets if you want to be left in peace!

Ruder to walk away or turn your back though

Another idea if it's not too quiet on the day you visit - always let someone else go into a room first so that they get pounced on instead, then follow them in and look around at your leisure - much easier then to either engage or drift away if you're not being "directly" addressed. All's fair in love, war and historic houses! 😁

I've had the reverse problem on occasion when I wanted some more info but the volunteers are talking amongst themselves or busy doing nothing in the corner of a room, avoiding eye contact.

I think it's easy enough to request more info or less in a reasonably polite way.

Same but different - a boutique near me has an overzealous shop assistant. She has a slightly superior air to her that you need her input, and you can't look at anything or pick up anything without her commenting on it and upselling other items and so on and talking through how long they have had them in and so on. I know all the sales techniques, and I know she's just doing her job but it makes me feel so self conscious that everything I look at she will comment on. I can't hear myself browse through the chatter

I don't go in any more if she's there, I walk on by.

(The commonality is that sometimes you feel the assistant or volunteer wants to show off rather than assist you).

Its at this moment I get my phone out and say excuse me I need deal with this. I then keep my phone in my hand and move away, thus not ever actually appaearing to deal with it and so they don't know when to return as I never finish

But as a value exchange it doesn’t really work. The largest motivator for volunteering was given as social opportunities- fine that is what the volunteer gets out of it. I pay cash to go, it is not up to me to provide another form of value in the form of servicing the needs of the volunteers.

I think you missed my point.
I was referring to my interest and desire to volunteer to help preserve the building and why I have that interest ( as opposed to PPs referring to volunteers being old and lonely and just wanting to have someone to talk to as the reason for being a volunteer ). If you read my full post you will see I’m against volunteers talking to people unless they have been asked a question.

Quite agree. I was shocked by the comment and there’s been more than one tbh.
Your three fact rule is interesting. I’ll keep that in mind when I start. I’m really looking forward to it as I’ve appreciated for many many years visiting lots of historical properties and the information happily given out. Without people such as yourself a lot of buildings would be lost to the public and others too expensive for a lot to visit.

But the social opportunities are with other volunteers and staff as well as public.
I quite agree it is not the job of the public to fulfill that need but if the volunteers are trained properly they won’t have to- it’s not an inevitable mismatch.

My brother in law is a Londoner and he never gets caught with people telling them their life story and talking on and on. I have no idea how he does it, he’s never rude. My sister and I can never quite manage to extricate ourselves at all. Can’t quite work out where the polite stop can come in.
although at Hampton court palace one of the volunteers totally wound up my kids and told them about ghosts. My kids then accused a shoe cupboard of having ghosts in it. And a load of foreign tourists dutifully took pictures of it. It was an IKEA thing that you put Wellington boots and umbrellas in

Posters slagging off volunteers should probably bear in mind that without volunteers these properties wouldn’t be open at all.

May be way off field but with all the protests over the last year or so with JUST STOP OIL i wonder if they are being hyper vigilant these days. It seems to be the way these protests work that they catch them off guard and cause damage to something 'physical' to demonstrate. By making conversation at every opportunity and visable maybe this is a concerted effort by the NT to be vigilant. The rules have changed and the protestors are as likely to be Norris & Dorris as it is some teenager.

Just a thought

I 100% hear you @Sunshineismyfavourite and have had the same issue with several museums, and art galleries, and stately homes. One did it last year. I tried looking peacefully at the displays and artifacts and paintings and sculptures etc etc, and some random volunteer from the place walks up to me and starts chatting to me, and goes into great detail about what I am looking at.

Firstly, if I want to know I will ask.

Secondly, I do actually do often KNOW some stuff about what I am looking at already.

Thirdly, most things have little signs at the side and notices in a laminated frame, with the information on, about said item.

One man kept me and DH is a really hot room 3 summers ago. It was about 80F (27 C,) outside and it was humid! It must have been 95F in this room, (35 C!) and it had a big skylight, and I was cooking on the inside! We had masks on too (it was mid 2021 - fuck you covid!) and I was dying! DH was starting to flag too, but like me, he was too polite to say anything!

After 15 minutes I said 'I really have to go - I am dying from the heat I'm so sorry.... ' The man seemed fine, but he was about 30 - and slim. I was 50-odd and menopausal and a bit chubby! 😆 DH too! (Well apart fro the menopausal bit!)

But yeah, I KNOW these people are being nice and kind and helpful, but they shouldn't bother people unless they ask. As I said, there are loads of signs and bits of information on each thing you are looking at anyway. I think they must just be wanting to relieve their boredom! 😆

It's easy for people to say 'you should say leave me alone,' but it's not that easy to actually DO it.

Some people in small independent shops do this too. I HATE going into any shop when there's no-one in there, because they are just sitting behind the counter and you feel you have to strike up a conversation with the person behind the counter. When all I want to do is look around for 10 minutes!

Same with market stalls. I feel awkward looking at the stock, because the owner of the stall just looks at me and smiles, and I feel I have to chat to them, and feel bad if I don't buy something!

Yes, my Mum is a volunteer in a museum but has a fairly busy life despite being in her mid 70s. She enjoys the social life that comes with volunteering, pub lunches, Christmas parties etc but she has other stuff going on and other friendship groups so isn't lonely, she is interested in the museum artefacts so that is why she initially joined. As a volunteer, she has more of a crowd control role though and helps with an interactive attraction where people take turns. If the Volunteers weren't there, the interactive stuff would often not be used as it needs someone to manage it.

Did somebody really say 'USE YOUR WORDS!?!' 😆 OMG cringe!

I worked in the sector for over a decade and feel this style of visitor engagement is very old-fashioned (regardless of whether it's done by volunteers or paid staff). It's weirdly patronising to think that the only way visitors will get the most out of a visit is if they get lectured at.

Most visitors visit these places primarily for social reasons, and secondarily to learn something - and all of the research shows that visitors retain very little of the information, usually max 1 main theme and 3 related facts. Nearly 70 years after Tilden published his principles of heritage interpretation, and some heritage sites still don't bother with interpretive planning.

Jargonless version - some people working in the sector are just as frustrated as you, OP

No-one is complaining about volunteers being there, and of course they are needed for some of the interactive things!

But they shouldn't be pushing themselves on people just quietly looking around artifacts and paintings etc, and forcing conversation on them, and coming out with a load of information about the item they are looking at.

If someone wants something/wants to know something, they will ask!

As a pp said, it's patronising to zone in on people like this, because you're assuming they know jack-shit about what they are looking at, and you absolutely MUST tell them.

Also, as I said earlier, most things have little signs by them with the information on it anyway. These volunteers need to be told to leave people alone unless they approach them!

Two thirds of almost 1300 people so far, agree with the OP and think she is not being unreasonable. So she is far from the only one who thinks volunteers in visitors attractions need to rein it it, and leave people alone, and only engage with them if the visitor approaches them first. Smile by all means, but leave them alone until they want you/need you.

.

.

As the volunteers made me feel unwelcome and that I will never visit one of their properties again I don't care if they are open or not.

Passive aggressively placed teasel 😂

He's a bloke. People expect women to listen. Men, on the other hand, are expected to be busy.

I mean, yes, I tend to agree and posted about my experience at a NT property. My Mum hates it when they come up to you in NT properties and do this as she tends to faint easily if standing too long. The museum she volunteers for is more about being present to practically help not deliver information on the artefacts, although she can do that if asked.

You were lucky you didn't have a bunch of Mummys with their wailing infants strapped to their chests and a horde of stampeding three year olds doing laps around the rooms 😂

Another reason why "use your words" is such a stupid response on this thread is that it originated as a way of encouraging toddlers to communicate instead of acting out their frustration. In other words, to urge little Sabrina to ask Charlie for a turn on the tractor rather than to pull him off by the hair. It isn't about getting people to acknowledge and express their needs: it's about getting them to modify and limit that expression of need.
The people who find it hard to politely ask a volunteer to leave them in peace are probably people who took this message too much to heart as toddlers. They are too good at suppressing their frustration and their needs.

This.

It was entirely possible to say that you are looking for some quiet enjoyment and you'll let them know if you have any questions.