National Trust visit spoilt by overzealous staff or AIBU?

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Visited a beautiful NT country house today. Huge 17th century house with Capability Brown landscaped parkland. The house has lots of art by Van Dyck - one of my favourite artists and I was really looking forward to spending a couple of hours with DH wandering around in the beautiful spaces enjoying the peace and quiet. However, every time I stopped to look at a painting one of the staff would come up to me and start talking. This happened several times in every room we wandered into. I totally get the enthusiasm and expertise of the staff but I wasn't really interested in hearing about the Civil War etc., I just wanted to enjoy the paintings in peace. We do visit NT properties occasionally but have never found this to be a problem before.
The staff just seemed to be unable to read my body language as I was trying to walk away or indicate that I didn't want to talk or listen to them by not responding or engaging with them. Short of telling them to shut up it was impossible.
It was a very quiet day with not many visitors so they were probably bored but it was way too much for us.
AIBU by being a miserable bugger (I know I'm quite unsociable at times) or should I be allowed to wander round in peace? Perhaps they should give out 'don't talk to me' badges with the tickets if you want to be left in peace!

I am a volunteer 'room guide' at a stately home ( not NT property) and have read some of the posts on here with some dismay, to be honest. Especially the ageist and dismissive posts about those who volunteer. I am retired, yes, but I am not lonely or desperate to chat. I decided to volunteer because I like the place I volunteer at, it has some interesting history ( IMO) and I have the time now I am retired. We have a number of volunteers who also work full time in other jobs as well as giving of their 'free' time

I do understand the comments that some volunteers go overboard, though, as I have occasionally been subject to such volunteers when visiting other places. I do try to read body language, but it isn't always easy to do, but am fully aware of trying to read, from body language and what they say, how much info people want.

We have some laminated printed sheets giving some info in each room but many of the more 'fun' facts are not on those sheets. To those who only want to walk through and not interact at all with the volunteers, you may be missing some things which you would probably be interested in and remember. Your choice of course, but I am a bit upset at the slagging off, of volunteers on some of these posts

We get good reviews, about the building AND the volunteers, so we must be doing something right. And as another poster said on here, if there were no volunteers, few if any of these places could continue to run as they do, and they would be lost to future generations. It's not just guides either. Many people also contribute their skills for free, such as gardeners, conservationists, archivists etc.

I doubt anyone has had the experience I had in Egypt! We were taken to see a boat exhibition near the Pyramids, I believe it's since moved, and our tour guide gave us information before we went in then left us to look around. I was stalked all the way round by a random man who tried to tell me things even though I had no eye contact with him or spoke to him, continued trying to take photos .Eventually I got fed up and stated to leave, he then demanded a fee for his 'guiding', it was only because our tour guide intervened that it didn't become even more ugly.
I've never had a problem with NT guides, we were members for many years, things may have changed.

Use Your Words can often lead to Did You Mean to Be So Rude ime. It’s No is a Complete Sentence syndrome all over.

Drives me nuts. I just walk off and leave. DH says its rude but i have tried being polite and after several years of suffering i now no longer politely listen.

Im generally not interested in what the volunteers witter on about. Im a historic buildings specialist and more interested in window fixtures, plasterwork etc than which famous person once had dinner in this room.

“To those who only want to walk through and not interact at all with the volunteers, you may be missing some things which you would probably be interested in and remember.”

^^And this kind of patronising attitude is the problem. I DON’T CARE. I don’t care if you think it’s interesting, I don’t care that you think I should know and remember this fact. I want a peaceful day out and to be left alone.

Most of my experiences with NT volunteers have been positive. Many have an incredible amount of knowledge and I've had some great conversations with them which has enriched my visit. I've been approached a few times but I'm happy to have a chat and learn more about the building, particularly as there can be little historical information on display in some places. My husband is less keen and he will wonder off LOL. I don't think this is to do with age or volunteers wanting to ease their loneliness (that's quite an assumption) but perhaps an over enthusiasm on the part of the volunteer and poor training. Personally I'm pleased to see older people finding a role in society and sharing previous expertise and knowledge. One day I may volunteer, maybe in a gardening capacity.

I agree!

Also, one person’s interesting fact is another person’s boring one. It’s also in the delivery. Some people can make most things really interesting but knowing something doesn’t make you necessarily able to deliver it in a interesting way.

I love the staff/volunteers at the NT properties. I don't like to feel like I'm bothering people so I probably wouldn't approach them, them coming over for a chat works well for me. They are always so knowledgeable and give far more details than you can get from the description cards.

I'm sure if you said something along the lines of "sorry we just want a quiet look around" they would leave you to it.

There is one way to combat this, take a toddler in. I have many memories of visits to NT properties where my ex insisted on going in the houses rather than just enjoying the grounds. I’d be forced to walk round with our DS holding his arms down by his sides to stop him touching anything. Wish I had a pound for every death stare I got from the volunteers who clearly didn’t want us in their areas 🥴😆

This is why I adore the old stately home near me (unsure if it's NT). It's such an underfunded city and in an area really not populated by the typical crowd who'd volunteer at a historical site, so when you go it's just... silence! Peace! Emptiness! Bliss.

'Use your words'.

Where did this hideously patronising, banal (not to mention inaccurate) cliche suddenly spring up from? It's really bloody annoying and it's never, ever used in good faith. It also says nothing about OP, but a great deal about those posting it.

Ugh.

This is true.
Also, one person’s fascinating fact is another person’s incorrect factoid (the number of times I have heard nonsense about ‘sleep tight’ being a reference to rope beds….).

Quite the opposite here with Nt buildings and kids. It never stopped the narrative in my case but I also didn’t feel unwanted. Quite the opposite.

A really lovely volunteer walked over to us at Petworth over Christmas to explain what something was by the fireplace that he could see we were questioning. He was very knowledgable and engaging with the kids and gave just the right amount of information. We frequently visit national trust houses with our kids and have only ever had positive interactions with staff and volunteers. I really hope this thread doesn’t dishearten those that give up their free time to volunteer as it is much appreciated by many. I do think it would be a good idea however if NT could come up with a system so that those that don’t want to be bothered can politely indicate that they would rather be left to wonder in peace.

@Silvers11
Your comment about visitors ‘missing out on things’ is a bit patronising. You have absolutely no idea what your visitors know, or do not know. Let them come to you.

Clearly there is an issue in the way volunteers are trained. The sheer number of responses on here would suggest that and I do hope this is picked up by
National Trust et al as the OP has really struck a nerve with this one.

Also, the overwhelming amount of people commenting so far have been polite and not ageist at all. Some have, but you’ll always get a proportion of idiots on threads this long.

I was an NT room steward for a number of years whilst I was in my 30's and I have to agree with the OP in some respects. I hate being pounced on when I'm visiting places.

As has been pointed out by plenty of PP, they are volunteers not staff, which is the root of the problem. Volunteers chose to donate their time for many reasons, and have varying levels of aptitude for the roles they take on.

I come from a customer service background and was regularly tearing my hair out at the inability of other volunteers to see when people would rather be left in peace. Some were excellent, some were well meaning, but a little oblivious, however the occasional one had only taken the role to have a captive audience for their own grandstanding. Some fuck off badges would be an excellent visual aid for volunteers.

However - the NT couldn't economically run without volunteers. When you join the NT or pay to visit a property - your money is for the upkeep of the places the NT care for, it is not a posh Merlin Pass.

As others have said managing volunteers is extremely difficult and the low paid actual staff work very hard at it.

Incidentally the reason I stopped volunteering was the appalling entitled behaviour I started experiencing from NT members about the time of covid.

Completely with you - it's very difficult to not come across as a bit rude when they launch into facts and spiels about what you're looking at but they are sometimes awful at reading body language.
I tend to kind of nod politely for a moment then literally walk away once I'm ready to and say thank you as I'm walking off. Not sure else what to do sometimes!

So no wonder she would have a lot to share and fascinating information and anecdotes.

Even If she does, that doesn’t mean everyone wants to hear them!

I think they feel they have to be doing something and of course many people like this.I am like you however and dont appreciate it.

Indeed, and as it happens she is absolutely not one of the in-your-face ones! Other than checking everyone’s HHA cards at the door she just sits there quietly doing very impressive knitting until someone asks her a question.

I visited a similar (not NT property), ahead of us was a guy on his own who was swooped on by every room guide in every room. In the first room, he did the polite listening thing. In the next, he did the "thankyou, but I'll ask if Ive qiestions" by the end hecwas more "please, leave me alone". Nothing he said worked. It was wierdly fascinating. By the end he was pretty tetchy, at which point that rooms tour guide was hugely offended. It was like a sketch from a bad 90's sitcom. Obviously the then-boyfriend and I did nothing useful, as was an irritating late teenager at the time.

Big over the head headphones.....

I completely identify with the OP in this. I also prefer to just take things in at my own pace, just admire things silently. My favourite aspects of NT properties are the decor and the peace of the grounds. There is plenty of information in the brochure or on the displays for me to read. Forced interaction stresses me out, if I want a guided tour I'll apply for one! My idea of actual heaven is a empty stately home! So I can pretend I'm in Bronte novel 😂I once went to a non- NT stately home on a weekday in the mid winter and it was totally empty except for me and my partner. There were no volunteers, only a grumpy man selling entry and there was no cafe or shop. It was incredible

https://youtube.com/shorts/swYLb-qWPN4?si=8ycqNXTeDImWJhq_]]

😂