To think there's an off/bad vibe out there?

[ARichSeamToMine]

Does the world feel "off"?
Sorry if this seems ranty, I'm really interested in the vote though.

I'm feeling like there's a weird vibe out there.

I live in London, meet a lot of people through work and am not just judging by my circle.

I've been struggling to articulate this.

I'm late 40s and have seen recessions etc before.

Was out in the City tonight and I would say bar and restaurant were busy for a Monday night, so good there. The street I was on had several completely closed offices, pubs and two gyms, which was sad.

I understand that changes in social habits have been affected by working patterns etc.

I just feel there is something else at play

I increasingly find that people are a bit...strange? We saw groups in the bar, who presumably went out together from choice, just gazing at their phones. I was never anti tech but I'm starting to wonder if there is something in the idea that it affects communication skills.

my friend is worried about her dad because he constantly watches videos of fights - this is a TV show in the US now I hear.

I know a lot of people in my age group feel very "meh" and have little enthusiasm for things, but it's not just middle age. I don't think so anyway.

I'm happy if people are happy, but starting to wonder if they are happy. I meet a lot of people who don't want to go out, are up at 5am walking a dog, they take care of themselves with a good diet, often vegan, don't drink alcohol.

I'm not saying any of these things are bad. I can see if the City is reasonably busy on a Monday night, hospitality must be recovering, which is great.

But something out in the world feels off...like people aren't interested in much.

My online creative writing group has almost no posts. The tutor is regularly cancelling workshops and looking to do online only.

I'm in touch with a couple of exes and we are staying friends but they seem to do nothing but gaming. One in particular has no friends and is not bothered.

I might get flamed but I do wonder if men are particularly prone to doing less stuff if they are single.

Again, that is fine if they are happy. But I get this sense that people aren't happy.

Social anxiety seems very much on the rise.

Just curious to know if others get this vibe.

YABU - people are fine and just living life as usual

YANBU - people are losing communication skills and becoming unhappy

Thats right, then they will be sitting in the local spoons at lunchtime with a pint and two brandies in front of them, LOL.

It's weird that we no longer have proper seasons either. What happened to winter? Is this climate change? I've scraped ice off my car windows once so far this winter.

Last winter was absolutely bloody freezing.

I was thinking this. Winter has been ridiculously mild

I'm not usually one for conspiracy theories, but I think Russia has reached the heart of Western Politics and the Socal Media we are addicted to.

I'm convinced that in the future Boris Johnson will face charges in connection with his Russian friends.

Somehow, someone with power and money played kingmaker, and 'made' Nigel Farage and Boris Johnson...talentless , workshy grifters and conmen who charmed a gullible public.

Our population, over the last 6 or 7 years, has been influenced to the point that to 'hate is seen as a strong and admirable quality, and to 'care' is weak and something to make fun of.

I guess England's history of entitlement and exceptionalism has made us so arrogant in general, we can't see what we have become.

Social Media..yes people are addicted to their phones..to engage in aggressive hate filled arguments , to troll, to doom scroll and to watch vacuous clips of nonsense. We have been led there though, by analytics and information gathering.

Anyway, I'm sure people will scoff at the above, but I will say one thing for certain, no way would I bring a child into this world now - especially into this crumbling, poverty stricken shell of a country.

@Raincloudsonasunnyday
I fully believe that a life rooted in nature and the outdoors, in different groups of friends and in community is the path to mental and physical stability - without which we can so easily lose ourselves and each other.

I agree with you.
I think covid was a turning point because that's when we lost each other. Quite a few posts on here pointing out people don't want to socialise any more. Whatever other shit is going on in people's lives, it's losing connections with others that makes it all so much harder. Sadly most people don't seem to realise the importance of these relationships until it's too late.

I totally agree about life being ‘off’. Have thought this for a while now. Initially put it all down to Covid - but though life would have gone back to ‘normal’ by now.

I have 2 children. One had all their pre school years pre-covid. One was born during lockdown so all pre-school years during/post covid. The difference between their life experiences is staggering ….

People aren't happy at the moment for sure. Many reasons really including CoL, recession, stupidly high energy prices and inflated prices of everything else from food prices to insurances. All things which most of us have to pay for one way or another.
There is also wider unrest about the upcoming GE, the Ukraine war, the Israel-Gaza war etc.
Looking back I think a lot of this started 4 years ago at the time of covid kicking off. The lockdown restrictions, which IMO were heavy handed, encouraged people to shut themselves away from the world and retreat to news and conspiracy theories on the internet. Those people that were not able to go out to work at that time due to lockdowns must have been going crazy with boredom and worry. I felt especially sorry for children who were not able to socialise with their friends as schools were closed.
Social opportunities for all were severely restricted for weeks and months at a time which was very damaging for some people, especially those living alone.
Also some people, including myself, lost close relatives to covid and were not able to see them in hospital in their final hours.

All of the above, which has been going on for some time, has left many people feeling depressed and worried for the future.😞

It’s caused by using some random symbol rather than an apostrophe.

@Naptrappedmummy
I think the whole ‘me and my little family’ culture doesn’t help. Of course babies and toddlers swallow you up a bit but I know so many women who do nothing bar the school run, housework, taking children to clubs and having ‘family weekends’. Fine but when their kids are teenagers and don’t want to know them anymore they’ll have nothing to do, no friends and no life really.

This is so true.
It's not even just those with children, it seems to begin as soon as people are in a couple. I've a few acquaintances who've split up from long term relationships recently and almost immediately dived into new ones (and posted it all over Facebook!). It doesn't seem emotionally healthy - no enjoying time for themselves, doing things with friends, making a new life based on them as an individual - it's all geared to coupling up again ASAP. In a way who can blame them, if everyone else is making it clear that the only way to have any companionship or nice days out is to be with a partner!

My theory is politics needs checks and balances and and too much of any ideology is bad.

Capitalism - gone way too far which causes problems with things like the housing market and the billionaire class. Nothing to reel it in. All governments we have dance to vested interests.

Liberalism - gone way too far. The Trans madness socially. Economically the neoliberal ideology which every government adheres to.

We've needed a reset since 2008 crash and instead the answer has been to go further to the above which was what caused the crash.

The media. Dreadful journalistic standards in the UK. Leveson ignored. Brexit as a legacy as the public gaslight for years by Murdoch/Mail/Telegraph

It wasn't cold here and I'm up north. The spring also started in February because the bees were out. It got up to 15 C one day.

You might not miss the office, but many people are just not socialising like they used to, and there are many posts on here from people who seem to not be able to interact with others any more. There are already far too many people who have anxiety and can't cope with life, staying home and not learning how to deal with others is not going to help with that. I fear for the future of society tbh.

I wouldn't be surprised in a few years time if WFH is looked on as being damaging.

Agree@Kdtym10
the very fact the blame is put on covid or the Government is in itself showing the very attitude change in people. ie to not look inwards at ourselves but to blame others.
We ve lived through this change from the 70s to now. Social media is the one factor that caused an explosion in entitlement

Yes, the aftermath of lockdowns and increased tech use. Also, remember we're in February and have had a few months without much sun. Things might be looking more positive once the sun starts shining, people will be out more and socialise more.
Bring on Spring!

"OP I don’t understand this part of your post:
I meet a lot of people who don't want to go out, are up at 5am walking a dog, they take care of themselves with a good diet, often vegan, don't drink alcohol

This sounds like me, and I’m perfectly happy (fit and healthy too). I can’t work out what’s wrong with being like that. Which part of it is ‘off’ ?"

I have a colleague who'll almost never go out for a drink with friends because he has some sport or other every night. Imo his life isn't balanced enough and he's missing out on fun and socialising.
Still better than being on computer games all day, I admit.

It's the fact people see things trending downward and therefore don't look forward to the future with optimism, or want to bring kids into the world.

I think there’s just a general hopelessness. The future looks pretty bleak, with people unable to afford homes or live comfortably because of the dysfunctional housing market and cost of living crisis. The birth rate is falling so who knows how pensions will be paid in the future. Austerity has resulted in schools and hospitals that barely function, and the concept of social mobility has evaporated. There’s not much hope for a better future and it feels to me like most people have responded by shrugging and retreating indoors.

I can assure you that NZ was not locked down for years 😂

@Clarebelle878

There’s not much hope for a better future and it feels to me like most people have responded by shrugging and retreating indoors.

This, 100%. I’m one of those people. I can’t cope with the world outside - it feels like a dog-eat-dog place where anything scary and dysfunctional could happen. I’ve responded by staying in more, focussing more on the things I can control - the house, making sure the family are well cared for. I have developed a suspicion and a wariness of people in general and feel like I’ve been wounded somehow. I think it may also be because I’m peri-menopausal 🤣

It's the cost of everything too, I went to Asda the other week and all I bought was some basic household stuff, loo roll, kitchen roll, toothpaste, milk, eggs, bread, butter, tissues, a few bits of cleaning things and a couple of snacks and it was £50! Nothing there it make any meals, just basically replacing things I had run out of. When I do go out and I add up what it has cost me, say a cinema ticket, a drink and an uber home it will be around £20-£30 and I am a member at our local independent cinema so get some discounts. I go out far less often than I used to do and one of the reasons is the sheer expense

I’ll also second the poster who said something about the social contract being broken. Younger generations are going to be up against it - and for what? When will they be able to retire and enjoy those leisurely lunches with fellow retirees? They can expect to work their asses off for shite housing - probably crammed into tiny flats which they need two professional salaries to keep. Savings - forget it.

Children - what’s the fucking point? Can they afford a family? With enough left over to give the kids a good quality of life? Lots of younger people are deciding they don’t want kids for this reason. They can look forward to working until they drop - and they’re rightfully pissed off about it

I agree with you op. The Covid pandemic sped up some of the worst aspects of social media. I think the same, I think people are very individualistic and narcissistic now. Not in a pathological way but it becomes pathological because of the effect on society. Then you have the worst of them all, fucking tiktok, which is nothing but a propaganda machine to destabilise society and turn us all into gormless muppets who only care about labels, micro aggressions and fucking 1000 variations of eyeliner. I want to scream at people to delete it all, fucking go out.

And I agree with pp working from home is damaging, especially for younger people, they’re all or nothing where they think we’re interested because they go for a cup of tea or some nonsensical bollocks. Or they don’t say anything and are scared of human contact. It’s not right for everyone and it should be the exception and never the default. I know there’s swathes of people that get mad about that but I’m sorry it’s just not healthy to work in isolation. I did it for a bit and became a fat depressed fucker.

I thought this this morning - it's like a post apocalypse with out the apocalypse. Its like the hope and humanity has dribbled away from the world and been replaced with a fake version- also know as social media.