To wonder what posh Mums cook for dinner…

[Primrosecottagelover]

I have just seen Pippa Middleton’s bikini photos on the DM. Three different bikinis so far, washboard abs & nothing jiggles as she chases three kids. She could easily pass as a fibreglass mannequin. I’m wondering why it is that the Middleton women and affluent women (even middle class at my child’s school), always seem to be so impossibly slim. I struggle with my weight and I would love to see the groceries, fridge contents, packed lunchboxes and dinner plans of the other half. Obviously I know what healthy eating and cooking is but, the bodies of Mothers these days is next level. Why am I struggling to keep my tummy from flopping out while women in their 40’s pull off wearing linen mini shorts (not in UK) and high waisted jeans.

😂

We live in an obesogenic environment. It doesn't mean that it's impossible to be thin but it can be an uphill battle for many.

What I see a lot of on threads like these is so much judgment and viewing being overweight as a moral failing. Constant denial of any factors other than greed/laziness is not helpful.

I think the single biggest influence being rich has on body size is simply the fact that it’s seen as admirable to be slim, fit and athletic. Self control is also seen as a positive trait and of course is a key factor for successful people. I don’t see that it’s any easier for rich people not to overeat.

I feel very unhappy when I’ve put on weight, not least because most of my friends are slim and I feel embarassed.

The negative impact of obesity on health is so significant that I think the UK has to stop normalising and excusing it and instead concentrate on educating people about the risks. I was amazed that covid wasn’t used to launch a national get fit programme given that after age, obesity was the second most significant risk factor for covid deaths.

What a horrible post.

More judgment the other way I would argue. If you are not overweight you must live on lettuce leaves and steamed fish, lead a totally joyless life and putting all this effort in just to keep your DH from straying.

There is a complete inability to comprehend that some people can eat cakes and other junk food and not be overweight because they aren’t stuffing themselves with them, moderation is key. I remember when I was pregnant, seeing a post on my birth board with someone wondering how they had managed to gain seven stone while pregnant when they had posted the previous day about eating a box of 12 donuts at lunch - 12 fucking donuts and you don’t understand why you have gained so much weight?? There is just complete denial from some people.

I don’t know the last time I read a thread on Mumsnet along the lines of ‘I am just so thin and miserable’ but I have seen plenty of overweight and miserable threads

I think it's pretty obvious - I don't know if you're just being wilfully obtuse or are just very attached to the idea that it's all your own fault if you're overweight but I will have one try at explaining how money makes a difference..

My life Vs PM's when we both had young children:

Me on mat leave -

No childcare - had to exercise either with the baby or at weekends

Up 4-8 times every night - too tired to exercise TBH

Breastfed clingy baby - often had to prepare and eat food one handed with baby in a sling

Her life -.

Nanny - could exercise as she pleased

Night nanny - much less tired

Personal chef - "can I please have a salad under 500 cals cut so I can eat one handed while feeding the baby"

Personal trainer so all exercise geared to making her as healthy as possible

I am not saying it was impossible for me to be as slim and fit as her but it's clearly easier if you have her resources and I don't understand why you try to deny it

I was at a toddler class where toast was offered. One slim and slightly posher than usual mum remarked that toast was always better elsewhere as at home you'd only allow yourself a scraping of butter 🤔. I absolutely didn't relate to this, I just wouldn't bother with toast at home with a scraping of butter, but I suppose that is the mentality you have to have at all times to remain slim.

Exactly. If it's making people so miserable and they can't stop...why do they continue? Shaming individuals for not having enough will power will never deal with the issue.

Sorry but the number of people who have personal chefs is vanishingly small. I’d be amazed if Pippa Middleton has one, that is really the 0.01%, in the UK anyway.

The only people I’ve come across who employ them permanently have them in their stately home and even then they don’t have one in London, only for weekends and holidays when they’re entertaining.

@Comedycook but equally don’t you think that telling someone who is obese that it’s all fine and it’s nothing to do with choices they’re making is not only unhelpful but downright dangerous.

It doesn't literally have to be a personal chef @Teddleshon there's various ways to outsource food, like something like Detox Kitchen meals which are unaffordable for most.

I get what you're saying, however it's not self discipline. I have zero discipline. I do eat whatever I want but the things I actually want to eat are largely unprocessed and considered 'healthy' I guess. I love cake, but only homemade ones, not supermarket bought ones which I find sickly. And my appetite is naturally quite small, I don't have much of a sweet tooth, alcohol doesn't agree with me. It's definitely not discipline, maybe more just long standing habits and fortunate preferences. If there's a bar of chocolate I prefer to just have one or two squares and will happily stop there. It's not self discipline, it's just that I don't want to eat more. I've never been on a diet or told myself not to eat. I eat when I'm hungry, what I want, when I want. The best thing to do is to get creeped out by ultra processed foods and then you won't want to eat them because they're not real food.

No but letting them fool themselves that people who are not overweight are only that way because they live miserable lives is not the answer either is it, instead it leads them to think that there is no point in trying to lose weight. Honestly there are so many people on this thread being wilfully ignorant as to believe that you can eat normally and not be overweight.

Personal responsibility is part of it but certainly not the whole story. If so many people are overweight or obese...it really can't just be down to an individual and down to individual mindsets. It's a much bigger problem than that. As humans we evolved to eat high calorie food when it's plentiful...it's a survival mechanism. Problem is food is always available nowadays. Some people have the tools available to avoid this instinct and others do not.

What I see a lot on these boards are many women who are incredibly proud of being thin. It's their greatest achievement. They have their thin tokens. They absolutely hate that there are women who don't work as hard as them to be thin. They enjoy lording it over them. They perceive them as lesser....less motivated, less disciplined. But like I said, being overweight is not a moral failing. It's a result of many factors. What you put in your mouth and how much you move is not a reflection of your character.

I actually think the worldwide solution for obesity is going to be medical rather than behavioural. We've tried that for decades and it hasn't worked.

Yes! This IS the diet. You're on a constant diet..!

@Comedycook I don’t recognise your description of people on this board who have posted about watching their weight.

Speaking for myself I stay thin primarily for health reasons, the same reasons I don’t smoke and limit my alcohol intake. I want to be a good role model for my children and give myself the best chances of living a long and healthy life. It’s hardly my greatest achievement though.

Do the royal family eat any carbs? My partner has heard the late queen never ate potatoes after reading your comment it must be true.

They don’t, the nanny cooks

How do you eat cotton wool and not just end up in hospital?

@Carpediemmakeitcount the queen was not particularly slim.

To you that would be a constant diet. To her she’s eating exactly what she wants to eat.

I think she was....it's just that famous people look so much bigger on TV than they are irl. I always think Camilla looks a bit dumpy in photos and on the TV but according to people who've met her, she's actually very slim.

I saw on a youtube video by the Queen’s ex head chef (I can’t remember his name) that she had a ‘jenga’ of about four chunky chips next to a tiny piece of battered fish every Friday.

And that she had a chocolate biscuit cake made on a Monday and sent up every afternoon when she was ‘at home’ with a tiny slice of it ready served on a plate next to it - but that she didn’t always eat it, if I remember rightly!

I saw a few pathetic adverts after Covid and then nothing. It was our best chance to get the message out there (a virus having just swept through the population which we know is much more likely to be seriously harmful if you are overweight). We completely missed the opportunity. They were quite happy to terrorise the population with adverts to do with ventilators etc (Matt Hancock admitted himself he wanted to scare the population into ‘following the rules’), but when it comes to weight, the government seems afraid of an actual hard hitting campaign.

I’m not the one being obtuse. I didn’t have childcare with small babies I just took them out in the pram every day when I walked the dog.

You don’t need a personal chef to make a 500 cal salad! You just need a fridge with a salad drawer - grab some leaves, avocado and nuts - done.

To be as muscly as Pippa you do need to work out regularly and eat a high protein diet, but you don’t need to join a gym you just need weights and resistance bands. And just to be slim doesn’t require any additional money at all. In fact - arguably less money spent on food and alcohol.