Children on Ipads in restaurants

[Somersetlady]

Away in a resort. I am shocked by the number of children on ipads for the entire sitting of a meal. Breakfast lunch and dinner.

Buffet to fine dining.

From todlers upwards.

No social interaction with parents or staff and mindless eating whilst inhaling cartoons.

i understand that parents want a bit of a break but surely this is shockingly bad for the children?

@orangeleopard exactly! Enjoy your meals with your son. I certainly enjoy mine.

I don't really care if you're upset. In the same way you don't care if the people around you are bothered by the use of screens at the dinner table. It's kind of a reciprocal don't give a toss.

Lazy parenting 🙄🙃

So bringing a bag full of activities which will half entertain your child is any better then bringing an iPad, which they will likely enjoy the entire time, is any better? Why is it better?
If they say and read a book and didn't interact would this be better?

It's a different world now to when we were all children. Stop demonising screens and stop shaming parents who are trying their best.

Just enjoy your food and get on with your day.

I do not believe any child has ever starved to death through lack of an ipad. Don't be so dramatic and take some responsibility.

@mintmagnum3 yes, it is better to have books, colouring, card games etc because these things facilitate a level of interaction.

A tablet is an immersive experience that essentially blocks out everything else in the environment.

@Helena7319 she did not say her child would "starve" through lack of an ipad, you are just nastily twisting things and you know it. She said that they would not be able to go out for a meal without intolerable levels of judgement, which make it so unpleasant that she would avoid it. Which is exactly my situation too. Is "not starving" the most we are allowed to hope for in terms of our children's enjoyment of life?

You are the PP who would judge me and my son "disgusting" if you saw us out and about, are you not? All I can hope is that our challenges in life are never visited on you.

@Helena7319 I have just read your incredibly nasty earlier message about not caring if people are upset by your judgemental attitude. Wow. The level of prejudice, ablism and pure spite is unbelievable. So your "upset" at seeing my son happily eating his fish and chips while watching a video (not sure why you are so upset by something that is none of your business and causes no-one any harm or inconvenience) trumps our right to participate in society in the form of having a peaceful and enjoyable lunch in a restaurant? Just fuck right off. Or better still, come and say that to my face in the restaurant.

It's people like you who make every day just that little bit more difficult for people with disabilities and those who care about them. Well done to you, you must be so proud of yourself. Have you an end goal in mind?

Do wheelchairs, hearing aids and guide dogs "upset" you too? Or is it just aids used by people with developmental and intellectual difficulties that offend?

An iPad is detrimental for them and will lead to long term developmental and behavioural problems. Books and colouring are harmless, it may be bad manners for an 8 year old to read at the table but it isn't actually harmful to their developing brain

As long as they've got headphones and not bothering me I don't care. One thing I did notice recently on holiday which did disturb me is how many even were watching at breakfast, I understand dinner may be longer and more tedious but to even be watching a screen so early does seem wrong. Another thing was the parents who set it up straight away even if the kids don't seem particularly interested, or worse when there were multiple kids who should really just be interacting with each other (child friendly resort, early evening so shouldn't be an issue). It seems this is the default for many.

Agree with this, again as one off's then no problem, but I did notice some parents seem to do it for the while duration of a meal, for every meal. The age of the child didn't seem to matter either

I always worried that people are judging me when I let my children watch iPads (on silent or with headphones on) when we were on holiday.

We would have got up early with our kids and played with them all day, eaten out at breakfast and dinner without screens. But by dinner time they were tired and not used to eating in a restaurant three times a day.

My husband and I probably manage a dinner out by ourselves about once a year. No local family to babysit and booking a babysitter just feels like one more chore to add to the to-do list. One week a year it’s nice to be on holiday and be able to chat uninterrupted over dinner. You’re judging parents on a very small window of their day with their children.

Well said. This thread has reminded me of just how crappy people can be.

My charming and lovely autistic DS does three types of sport, yoga, dancing, and is in a circus group and an amateur drama group. He chats all day long (using a phone screen as he is non verbal, sorry if that would upset you @Helena7319?). We moved hundreds of miles to be in a place and at a school we thought best for him. We moved away from the UK so that he will one day have his EU passport back and not be limited in where he can live. We have been through a great deal emotionally and financially as a family to get him to where he is. He is the centre of our lives and everything we do.

And you are going to sit there judging me and calling me lazy and disgusting because he and I sometimes enjoy a quiet restaurant meal together on a Saturday afternoon without people staring and tutting at us? @Helena7319 you do you. I know which type of human being I would rather be.

Nope, not always.
My two boys will sit and play together on their iPad and take turns.
My neice would sit and read a book and not talk to anyone.

I'm not pro or anti iPad, but you can't speak for every child. Listen to what others are saying on this thread if you can't see it from the other side.

Don't worry about people judging you, from OPs post it shows she's quite happy to spend a significant amount of time ignoring her children whilst arguing on SM. She then trots out rubbish like, I've interspersed it with swimming, when everyone can see that she's posting every 2-4 minutes, then has the audacity to judge other parents!

Honestly, enjoy your family like, it sounds great and well measured.

Of course lots of MN, don't want to talk to their DHs, cause they've decided they're useless by the time they've got two children with them, great that you and your DH, still have time and energy for each other.

@doilooklikeicare 😂🙈 love this response!!!

This thread had me feeling so down, but your post really lifted me!

This is a broader debate about a child rearing dilemma of modern times, its not just about 15% who need ipads for medical reasons

Its a shame that booking a babysitter is seen as a chore, surely it's worth it for the relationship to have an evening with out the kids occasionally

I don't want a babysitter for Saturday lunch. I want to spend the day in town with my son and enjoy a lunch with him. When we are on holiday we don't have the option for a babysitter, and in any case, we like to spend time together as a family, including at mealtime.