Looking at "insta worthy" homes gets me down..

[JackSpratski]

I try so hard to keep my house nice.. but it's just, not. I don't have a hallway, just a tiny porch. No big bifold doors, no kitchen island. Walls that the plaster crumbles just by looking at it. A garage you can barely walk in as we have no storage space.

Looking at all these insta houses (the one I'm looking at at the moment is the haddon home.. they're usually working mums too.. and their houses are immaculate. I don't know how they do it.
Anyone else feel this way?

You're a homeowner by the sound of it which is beyond the reach of many.

It might be a good idea not to look on social media at what other people have that you don't.

There’s an easy fix to this…..don’t look. Fill your time with something more worthwhile which brings you pleasure instead. (I say this kindly).

I was just thinking about this! I unfollowed all the beauty and fashion influencers spending £££ on clothes, with 'perfect' hair teeth and bodies and felt a lot better about myself after a week, but ive realised I've just replaced that with home instagrammers! So I think I'm going to do a cull and ONLY follow the ones who clearly have the same budget as me (none 😆 ) and show the reality of it - one perfect room but the kitchen looks like a big standard kitchen, okay this corner looks beautiful but up close you can see the skirting dirty, plaster has cracked, the desk is a cheap one covered with vinyl etc

Stop look at them then if they make you so upset.

I immediately unfollow any instagram account that makes me feel shit. If it's not helpful for my wellbeing its gone. You should too.

They're pretty pictures to look at but they're not reality. The people posting these photos shit and have bin juice the same as the rest of us but they don't choose to show you that because then you might realise none of it's real.

Should do same rather, unfollow.

Focus on what you do have 💖

The reason I don't follow Instagram !

We don’t have an island… if we did my dc would fill it with crap.

Just had a look and Haddon Home is a "working mum" in the sense that her bio says she's a "digital creator". She spends all day in her house making it look nice for photos.

I agree just don't look. These are carefully curated images which some people make a living from so don't mistake it for "normal life". There will ALWAYS be someone with a nicer house and a bigger kitchen but there will also ALWAYS be plenty of people who would love what you have.

It's an old cliche but comparison really is the thief of joy.

My Nonna used to say to me and my siblings all the time "you kids are spoilt; you have no idea how lucky you are; be grateful; count your blessings" etc and it drove me absolutely crackers at the time. As a teenager I hated being told this but now as an adult I think it must have gone in.

I feel lucky because of my circumstances but also because I can appreciate them if that makes sense? I know it's easier for some than for others to be grateful and see positives and I think that is a real gift. I know plenty of wealthy people in big houses who still have a general sense of disappointment with life so don't be thinking everyone else is skipping though life with glee.

Do you need to follow these things?
Is there any benefit to you whatsoever? Nope?
Then just don't.
Never has it been so easy to find ways to compare ourselves to others and destroy our own confidence in the process.

Just don't follow any of it.

Just had to look up The Haddon Home. Looks like they ripped up all life from their garden and covered it in plastic. It looks so fake, soulless and very, very dated.
The grey thing with cheesy writing on walls is such a cliche. “Work hard, play hard” 🤮
I can’t see any colour at all in that house.

I always find these sorts of posts strange, because I am managing to get through life without insta, and facebook, and whatnot. There is a very simple solution to these things that are causing such stress. Why bother with these things, if they are not doing something to enhance your life?

I read these threads and presume the OPs comparing themselves to fake online accounts must be very young and naive.
Delete the app and live in the present. You’ll be so much happier.

Plus while you are clicking on these things that are making you miserable, you are helping to create capital for these people, so they can have even more.

Sometimes the news gets me down. When it does, I stop watching it for a few weeks. Could you do something similar with Instagram?

Comparison is the thief of joy! Stop looking/following, stop comparing your house to others’ and focus on making it as nice as you possibly can, over time. Most people can’t instantly afford show-home style and it takes years of saving.
Gratitude also helps a lot - remembering that you have a roof over your head, a happy/healthy family, etc. Honestly, being grateful for the things you do have rather than lamenting the things you don’t is the happiest way to live.

I had a look too it's quite a simple formula in some rooms like the bedroom, tack on some panelling, bedside table ra h side of bed, white or neutral bedding. It's not hard to achieve.

If you have plaster crumbling we'll maybe work on your walls and getting them into a decent finish.

I have a certain style I like I just looked at pictures and almost.copied them. My garden is similar to the Haddon home one I like that LA look so I pit down white paving I have steps going through the grass as a path but my grass is real as are the plants and some small trees bit I got that LA vibe going. Took me 10yrs of saving to afford the garden job though.

Depends on if u want to spend the money if u can.

The Haddon family will be happy with the views that, no doubt this post will generate, (not from me though!)

A lot of people will do what is called staging for house sales.
and a lot of influencers hide the mess from the camera and have an area of tidiness.

they also have £££££/$$$$$ which a lot of us aren’t so fortunate to have HOWEVER you have a roof over your head, that is a blessing!

if you’re following to aspire and use as a goal, great. But don’t compare. What they have on screen doesn’t show what you may have in abundance.

No, the rooms they show you are immaculate. You don’t see the cupboard about to pop open because all the junk’s in there, the clutter shoved into another room to allow for photos to be taken (then it all comes back out). It’s fakery, plain and simple. Don’t feel bad. No one really has a house like that and the people that do treat it like a full time job.

I thought I had vision issues looking at that. I like a home with tatty books on the shelves, a cat or dog doing their level best to cover the house in fur/attack the soft furnishings/generally clutter the place up. I like to see candid family photos where everyone just looks normal even if someone looks tired/grumpy, isn't looking at the camera, is showing a double chin with laughing.
Those homes aren't something to aspire to OP a home should feel warm and lived in, the kind of place you can go for a cup of tea and a cuddle when it's been a hard day. Snuggle under the mismatched blanket on the sofa that auntie Susan knitted and no one has the heart to tell her, it shouldn't have gaps in it and brown and orange zigzags aren't everyone's cup of tea, but it's chilly and it's useful. Where there's probably Lego under the sofa and crumbs under the seat cushions.
My home is my family's and I wouldn't sell it all over social media for anything, and people wouldn't want to see it anyway!

I've deleted SM. It all got too much for me. I'm more content day to day.