DH and his flag pole dream….

[Lilysienna1]

DH mentioned a few years ago, that he has ‘always wanted’ to have a flag on display in the front garden. A proper flag on a pole, that we would raise up every morning, and ‘fly at half mast’ when the occasion calls for it.

I have never ever even thought of having a flag. We are British and I know it’s quite common in America, but not so much here. DH isn’t a football fan, so it’s nothing to do with the flag flying we see during the World Cup and the like.

last year, for Christmas he said the only present he would wish for, was to have that flag. He was most disappointed with the watch and aftershave he received instead.

He has now mentioned it to 13 year old DD who thinks it’s ‘kinda cool’ and she could imagine using it behind her for tik tok dances.

So now, I’m being made out to be highly unreasonable and a bore, for saying I do not want to raise a bloody flag every morning and see it outside the front of my house every day. I did try to compromise by saying ‘maybe’ a small one in the back garden, but DH says it’s to go out the front only, and why should we be ashamed of patriotism.

We don’t live in a grand estate home, just a detached house in a redrow cul-de-sac. The neighbours wouldn’t be affected as there are large trees between our only neigbours drive and ours, and we are on the corner.

However, everyone that comes in and out our road will see it as it’s the first house.

what would you do?? Give in and say yes to DH and his flag pole or put your foot down? Am I really being that unreasonable and boring? Does anyone else fly a flag? 🤦🏻‍♀️

Say yes, as long as you have the choice of which flag.

The wokerarti peddling their new form of fascism and policing people’s thoughts and values once again. They seem to have no issue forcing shame and silence on others, as if it’s their life’s godly work to shut down any form of civic pride or celebration and we should be eating gruel and saying our Hail Marys for all of eternity.

July 4th, white settler colonialism day.

In response to being dehumanized as "merciless Indian savages" in the 'Declaration of Independence' (white settler colonial document): "Any holiday that would refer to my people in such a repugnant, racist manner is certainly not worth celebrating. [July Fourth] is a day we celebrate our resiliency, our culture, our languages, our children and we mourn the millions — literally millions — of indigenous people who have died as a consequence of American imperialism"

https://www.mic.com/articles/121671/native-americans-have-nothing-to-celebrate-on-july-4#.Qst75mbCL

Honestly, the more I read the less of an issue I see! It doesn't sound like there's any underlying tension about his views or what you fear it might represent so personally I think I'd chalk this up to quite a sweet quirk and a pretty easy way to fulfil a dream of someone I love and make them happy with very minimal effort from me!

It's quite endearingly wholesome from what you've said!

Genuinely curious what your actual objection is? If it's just "what will the neighbours think" I'd personally prioritise a good husband's happiness (as hopefully he would for you)!

What are the "obvious reasons" why your DH wouldn't be desperate for a flag pole?

@SqueakyShouts Yes, people regularly fly the rainbow flag here, especially during Pride Month.

I think switching up flags is a good compromise, tbh. Although I haven’t flown a Union Jack yet-our Canadian neighbors regularly have their maple leaf flag flying though. 😂

Doesn't he get a say?

@Salaaaaaaaah Did you read my entire post? People fly literally every type of flag.

Do you live in the US?

I'm sorry you feel that way (genuinely) but that is quite the unjustified prejudice. People are allowed to be proud of their country, culture and heritage.

If it would really make him that happy, I'd go for it

TBF it's virtually impossible to tell especially if it's up on a flag pole.

Nope.

Unless it has Starmers meaty jowls splashed across it with #weareallwomennow with a cute little 🌈 then it won’t be welcome by some in the village, and she will be shunned at the corner shop by those that wish to punish her for stepping outside her colonial shame for a minute or two and indulging her husband and his scout tendencies/passing pride.

"colonial shame" 😂

😂😂😂

"Offensive" is not a word I would use, or have used on this thread...

Our national flag on its own can have many meanings, from the most twee and harmless to the most awful. Bake Off bunting. A Royal wedding mug. Fighting the Nazis. Being a modern day Nazi.

Flying a Union flag on a pole outside your house is not very common at all in the UK.

Where it is, it is often symbolic of some of the nastiest parts of our national culture and history. Scottish and Ulster sectarianism. English football hooliganism. Far-right nationalism. Empire and colonialism. The "send 'em all back" elements of Brexit.

(When someone on this thread says it's "normal for Dagenham", you have to bear in mind that Barking and Dagenham has been a hot bed for far-right political activism for many years.)

So, flying the flag means you run the risk of being thought of as being one of "those people", as many people on this thread have testified to.

You don't need to be "offended" by the flag. Offence is not the issue. People are right to be wary of the flag. You can never be sure if the intent of the flag is benign (Paddington and Bake Off) or awful (racist.)

I don't know why you would do something which will make some people think you might be racist. Even if you're not. Once you know that flying the flag would make some people uncomfortable, why would you want to do it, even if it's your right to?

China is perhaps the biggest player in modern day neo colonialism to date, but I don’t see any outrage from the wokes on here about that do you?

I don’t see boycotts of Chinese goods and a refusal to participate in Chinese new year. As far as I can see they are only interested in British penance for historical colonialism dating back centuries, and ignore the human rights atrocities and modern day colonialism happening right now !!

Still ordering tat from Amazon, and berating us instructing us to live in deep shame without flags or bunting is much easier I imagine than getting china to stop their expansion..

masterbeth doesn’t get out much…

‘One of those people’

Where the hell do you even start with that?

I would fly the Union flag as I'm proud to be British. If that makes someone uncomfortable then that's on them, not me.

"Wokerati" and "what about China?". You just need something about the evils of 5G to complete the set.

@MasterBeth Is the Union Jack viewed as negatively as the English flag? Genuine question as I moved away a few years ago so am slightly out of touch.

‘One of those people’

Care to elaborate?

Please don’t ask her she thinks all flags are the devils spawn.

Interesting that you haven’t commented on Chinese expansion into the developing world…

The little Englander racists that I had just referred to. Please try and keep up.