Friend won't go to "building site"

[ChedderGorgeous]

My friend and I are due to go away "somewhere in europe" at Easter. We had agreed on a city break. Lots of options were discussed and we settled on Barcelona where neither of us have been. Flights booked but no accommodation yet. One of the sites we discussed being excited to see is la sagrada familia.

In conversation, I mentioned that it seemed crazy to us, living in 2024 that it had taken 140 yrs to complete and still wasn't quite built, but in the past this was the norm for cathedrals. My friend was more silent for the rest of the convo and today she asked if we could actually rebook for someone else as she didn't fancy going to a "building site" on her holiday (she particularly likes to visit cathedrals wherever she goes). Wtf? I've tried explain to her that it won't be like the quarry of the HS2 extension there, but she is insistent that she only sees a cathedral in "all its glory".

I'm so frustrated with her (given flights are already booked) that quite frankly I'm going to cancel. AIBU?

She sounds nuts. If she’s so into cathedrals then she would have known that’s it’s “not finished” and why did she agree to go?? If things can be changed without cost then maybe change, but otherwise just go and she can do something else while you visit the cathedral.

Sagrada Familia isn't a cathedral. Just to be pebdantic.

Pedantic

Really??? You wouldn't go visit Barcelona because you saw a crane??? Christ Almighty sometimes (actually more and more often) MN astounds me 😖

Oh and they BOTH wanted to go there and booked it together.

OP- your friend is an idiot ( as others have rightly pointed out), and you would be mad not to go because of her idiocy. But, I couldn't be friends with someone so stupid and definitely would not go on holiday with her.

That's really weird. I would just split off and meet back up.

What an idiot she is, when I visited Barcelona this was my favourite part of the city.

What exactly does she envisage?

she has said she can't tick off a work in progress.

Oh God. One of “those”…..

If that’s a building site I’d like to live in a building site please!

Yes to all the people who have explained that the actual, official Barcelona cathedral is not Sagrada Familia, but the one someone shared earlier. And there are other incredibly beautiful churches in the city. But, in your shoes, OP, I don't know if it's worth even trying to convince your friend. She sounds that very specific mix of ignorant, stupid and stubborn that would make me want to smash plates. I would go without her and ditch her after this - you must be very patient and tolerant for her not to have irritated the fuck out of you by now.

She's unreasonable, but you know that
Do you usually have a good time on holiday together?

Surely she means change the excursion and not avoid Barcelona altogether?

Sagrada familia isn't actually a Cathedral, it is a large church, there is already a cathedral in Barcelona, which is finished. She can go and look at that, in all its glory!

I empathise with your 'pain'. Her take is ridiculous. In your shoes, I would definitely feel miffed since you have had the excitement of planning and booking (and I'm one of those holiday bookers that almost enjoy the planning as much as the actual trip) it, she's tainted that with this ridiculous take and now, if you go, there's an potential weight above your head that she'll continue to spoil the trip while you're there. That in turn has probably spoiled the trip for you already.

Coincidentally, I had a Barcelona/group friend trip that was spoiled by various gripes and was one of the straws that eventually broke the back of our friendship. As a result, I generally don't remember the place fondly and have no interest in going back.

So between then and getting with DH (a period of about 8 years) I opted to travel solo which worked much better for me.

There may be plans you can put in place so you can still enjoy the trip with her, with you going to La Sagrada Familia on your own. But, if you don't think that could work you could always ask her if she still actually wants to go, given that cathedrals are her thing. I think cancelling it unilaterally YWBTA but I do understand why you're feeling the way you do.

I’ve been a few times over the last ten or so years and it’s always been spectacular but it’s almost done now (thanks to advances in 3D printing technology!) and I don’t think she’d even notice the building work now.

Just tell her you were wrong & it's complete, you got your churches muddled. Show her the actual cathedral instead.

I was there last summer. The road works at the bottom of La Rambla (Columbus monument) were worse than the “building site” she is worried about!

What about a different cathedral? There’s multiple amazing ones in Barcelona itself but there’s also Montserrat which is stunning and you could do a guided bus tour, it’s up in the mountains.

I’d just go there without her and she can amuse herself for a few hours.
We went when it was almost entirely shrouded in tarpaulin and it was still utterly breathtaking. Definitely not to be missed. She sounds very odd

30+ years ago I went to the sagrada and at that time you could go up one of the spires, part by lift, part stairs. When right at the top there was some flimsy scaffold and you could walk from one partly finished part of the tower to another. Terrifying and wonderful. Wished I'd had a phone camera then!

Went again about 4 years ago and it's transformed. Magnificent inside. It feels finished inside. A remarkable place surrounded by nice park. The stained glass windows are beautiful. It really is a masterpiece.

Ditch the strange friend and go. You need to book tickets though and they do enforce entry times.

You'll love it.

Yes, do. The Cathedral of St Eulalia and the Holy Cross has resident geese inside - so well worth a visit. She will be delighted.

This is hilarious. Could you show her some pictures to prove it's not a 'building site' ? It's pretty impressive by anyone's standards.

Just to say if you do go book the tickets for Sagrada Familia at least a couple of weeks before you travel, especially if you want to go up the towers. We went in October last year and really struggled to get tickets having just assumed we could book a day or two in advance. No tickets at the door any more at all.

She sounds a bit insensitive, and that t-shirt concept implies she likes things neat & tidy! I would just try annd accept her limitations and spend the day by yourself, soaking in the amazing atmosphere there. When someone really annoys me like this I try and think of the reasons I’m friends with them. I’m sure she has her good points?

Well don't change the trip to Paris, whatever you do. She'll shit a brick when she finds out that even though Notre Dame was pretty much finished for several hundred years, it's a bit of a building site still !

Most English cathedrals are also under a fair bit of scaffolding, which is a shame if you're a fan of elaborate West Fronts.

I think I’d go alone rather than with someone who gets a tick-box T-shirt of her travels. 😬

Tbh I found the Sagrada Familia a bit of a letdown because of all the scaffolding (although I’ve not been for 10 years, I don’t know if it’s still the same). But there’s a lot more to Barcelona, it’s still worth going. The Casa Batllo is incredible, as is the Barri Gotic, the old cathedral… I’ve been twice and didn’t make it as far as Parc Guell, because there’s so much to see and do in the centre.