Future MIL dress for our wedding...

[tellmeyoursecret]

Getting married this year and MIL to be has been stressing about her dress for a while as she hadn't found one she likes..

During convos with her, I have mentioned that I don't mind what she wears as long as it isn't white! (This has been in conversation a few times)

She has now bought a dress (pic attached)

When I first saw it after she bought it I was thinking omg it's too white and I still think so now- my dress is off white and in pictures her white would really stand out!

Would I be unreasonable to ask her to change her dress as I am uncomfortable or do I leave it and ask the photographer to not place us directly next to each other?!

In photos this dress will not clash with your dress any more than men's shirts will. It's really not going to be a problem

It’s also just very tacky and ugly tbh - unless she’s very slim and tall it will look horrendous

Does it really matter? No one is going to think she's the bride. I think YABU.

Do you not want her happy and enjoying your big day? The dress is lovely. You will look lovely in your wedding dress and she will look lovely in her dress. If she feels good in it she'll enjoy the day even more.

Will your DH be upset if your dad wears the same colour suit as him?

I don't understand giving people rules of what to wear. It's patronising.

My own mum wore an ivory outfit on my wedding day. The photos were lovely. She looked and felt a million dollars. It didn't even cross my mind that would be an issue. My MIL wore the same colour as my bridesmaid. Everyone else looked great and had a great day and that's what I remember when I look at our photos.

She’s obviously only going to wear that dress to upset you.
She’s been on MN and knows the rules.
Call off the wedding she has raised the man you’re about to marry.
It’s got disaster all over it.
😉😁😁

The photographer will make sure it all looks good in the photos so I definitely wouldn't worry about that aspect of it! It's why you have hired a photographer rather than asking a family member to take photos on their phone :)

I think it would annoy me because it's the one colour you said not to wear, but I really don't think it looks bridal so as an objective observer, I think it will be completely fine! It won't look weird. But then again I had a massive bee in my bonnet about the colours of the carpet at our wedding venue (they gave us the red room instead of the blue one we had booked, and I was worried the flowers would become camouflaged) so I'm not here to judge you for caring about something that really doesn't matter in the grander scheme of things 🙃

It's way too white.

Who are you inviting to your wedding that doesn't know you are the bride?

Does it really matter? She obviously likes it and feels nice in it. I’d just be pleased she’s found something she likes.

That's a stunning dress - if she's tall and slim she should go for it! She won't be next to you in the photos anyway - dont the bridesparents stand next to you and your DFs stand next to him?

We coordinated the colour/outfits at my wedding so that flowers, bridesmaids, MIL, DM and DAunt were all coordinated pinks/lilacs so friends knew they were part of the family party. They all looked fab in the photos! Mind you that was a thing 35 years ago! 👰😂

It looks like part of the next Warlock tier set in World of Warcraft. What an odd choice for a wedding. Honestly don't get people incapable of picking any other colour than white.

The dress is fine. It’s not white or bridal-looking.

If someone asked me not to wear white, I’m afraid it wouldn’t occur to me that meant not to wear ANY white, OP; I’d take it to mean ‘don’t dress like a bride’. So I’m with the posters who think it’s perfectly fine for your MIL. Whether or not you ought to say something to her, if you’re really upset by it, is a different question… (Sorry, I realise that’s not much help!)

Unless the bride is turning up in a plain white knee-length sack and no accessories, this outfit is absolutely not going to attract more attention than than the bride.

It's not 'attention-seeking', ffs. It's just a formal day dress.

I would call off the wedding and rebook for a day without telling her.

You'd be utterly deranged, then.

It looks fine to me, but I'm not you!
It's definitely not bridal and it's navy/ivory so not white as such, although I appreciate it's close!
Personally I couldn't be bothered creating a drama with family about a perfectly acceptable dress (you should have seen what some people wore to my wedding!!!)

If she likes John Charles, why not go on their website. Lots of similar silhouettes that are not at all white

Assuming its a small wedding I don't see why they can't just rebook for another date and not invite her

Exactly. She's chosen it deliberately

It isn't. It's body con with side panelling designed to draw attention. It's white which is a no at a wedding especially when asked not to and black which is the colour of mourning.

That isnt a white dress its a typical MOB dress but if it makes you uncomfortable you must say as it will brew

@tellmeyoursecret doesnt even look like the mother of the groom dress! and not saying anything but I do see a lot of white on it! what country are you in OP????

Wearing white is not really an issue these days albeit it is if the bride expressly asks not to. Kate wore white to Meghan's wedding and both carol and Camilla wore something very very pale to some wedding

It wouldn't bother me. It is a nice dress and doesn't look at all bridal.
I would let it go to be honest. If she likes it and feels comfortable, then I think it is fine. It is a black and white dress. NOT white & NOT black.

Perhaps you are being a bit precious.

My thoughts exactly! Unless she is very tall and very slim it will look awful.