Don’t have more kids if you can’t afford them!

[SportMum1982]

I’m not a raving Tory! But honestly I would have loved more children!!! I would have loved 4 kids but I know we cannot afford 4 kids.

Why do people expect the state to pay for their children? Bar education though! If I’m being really cruel tell me, but I feel I did want more kids but stopped.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-67999028

If the govt made it MANDATORY for men to support their children after a break-up, it would be much better.

Personally I don’t think anyone should have more than two. However much you earn, your children will use healthcare and education. If circumstances change, even more so. The world doesn’t need exponential growth.

@Lavender14 you are fluent and articulate and your posts appeal to everyone who feels hard done by. Which is fine and dandy, but for all the people who just get up, go to work, possibly in a dull job, this is window dressing.

You are talking about people, you know.

@Newchapterbeckons , some men will give up work or say they're self employed to get out of paying CMS.

Some may seem perfectly nice then when things go wrong they turn into shits.

Let's not blame women for men being shit. Women are not psychic.

And in 99% of cases they are left holding the baby. It's not fair.

Totally agree with you OP. Mumsnet has some very strange views on this. Someone posts that they want to get a dog- and all hell breaks loose reminding them of the responsibilities they are taking on/ how will they afford it/ what an irresponsible decision that may be. Yet, when it comes to having children, it’s a free for all!

All children are a need, not a want. People should prepare for circumstances to change, and take that into account. At the end of the day, it’s the child who will suffer if the parents cannot provide for them- that shouldn’t then be for the state to sort that out.

Why did you have children then if you hold those views and are that worried?

@feelingalittlehorse provkding for children whose parents are failing them is EXACTLY what the state should provide

Interestingly, the running poll of opinion is very very strongly 85/15 in favour of people NOT having children they can't afford.

@feelingalittlehorse children are separate people in themselves - they deserve to be support d by the state when they are in need just as adults do

@Lavender14

Sorry, I didn't mean for the post to come across as goady at all and I do appreciate that we are in an incredibly fortunate position. We are currently on a very low fixed mortgage until 2026 and I am conscious that I will need to be working a lot more once my youngest is in full time school.

I think what I was trying to get at is I see people with one or two children constantly booking weekends away, or spending hundreds on days out and making massive home purchases and then saying they have no money. We are by no means well off and husbands income is below average. My earning potential is higher than his but I wanted to be at home with the children while they were under school age. We do all of the things you've mentioned - I don't remember the last time I bought new clothes for myself or the children and I won't buy anything new unless I've scoured vinted and market place first.

I agree would like to have had another child but didn't as could not afford it. There are so many families here in Ireland who have 5,6,7, children because they know is no cap on child benefit and why would you keep having children if never worked a day in your life or plan to. The travelling community always have 5/6 children and that is nearly 1000 a month from the government along with rent paid and social welfare. Should be a cap on 2 children.

How, when you can only get benefits for 2 children?

I agree and it bugs me no end that there's a certain contingent of women on here that will absolutely not have it that women are as capable as men of making bad decisions.

No one's talking about women who've been the unfortunate victim of circumstance - a woman left when her husband died, a woman left when her husband upped and left a formerly happy marriage.

Because - as you well know - Tax Credits and/or Universal Credit might not have 'benefit' in the name but that's what they are.

What's your point?

This - it seems a big misconception that the 2 child cap applies to ALL benefits for children.

It only applies through UC for children born after a certain date. So it does not affect children who were there before the cut-off date.

Education is good, starving children is not.

In my line of work children of parents on benefits are not starving.
It's the parents who earn just over the benefits to qualify for no help that struggle.
If you work and need childcare for the holidays is £50 a day. On benefits it's free.

You’re right of course, but they won’t listen 🤷🏼‍♀️ those parents should feel ‘lucky to have a job’ and be happy to provide for others…

If you lie about your health you can get benefits you are not entitled to

Prepare to be told this doesn't happen, mydogisthebest, because it's "practically impossible to get benefits even when you have stacks of proof"

As for the PP's suggestion of vouchers instead of cash, this has been mentioned many times before and every time we're told they're an insult, with lots of "Why should they's" tacked on

I don't get why the child allowance on UC is higher for a child born slightly before April 2017 than the one born after. It doesn't make sense really.

if we lived in any other country without nhs and even without free schooling would people choose to have as many children as they do?

The only countries without either universal healthcare or free secondary education (very few countries don't have free primary education, at least in theory) are the poorest developing countries. And in such countries the birthrate is always much higher than in the UK. A country with neither universal healthcare nor free education will always have a tragically high childhood mortality rate; and countries with a high childhood mortality rate always have a high birthrate.

Can I check - nobody here who agrees with the 2 child cap, gets UC, child benefit or money towards childcare?

Because you've been on here saying that if you can't afford to have children without input from the tax payer, you shouldn't have them.