To think there should be some sort of penalty for people who pull out of buying a house for crappy reasons?

[AngeloMysterioso]

DH and I live in a tiny (c. 700 sq ft) 2 bedroom flat. With our three DC- 4, 2 and 3 months. We first put the flat on the market early last summer, got a “cash buyer” pretty quickly and had an offer accepted on a house that was completely perfect for us. However, our buyer turned out to be more full of shit than a Glastonbury long drop and it all fell apart before we’d even got a memorandum of sale.

Meanwhile, prices continue to plummet, we end up taking £25k off our asking price. Eventually accepted an offer from a lovely elderly lady who came to view the place with her son, daughter and son in law. She was downsizing from a 2 up 2 down and didn’t have a buyer yet but we accepted the offer as by this point I was very heavily pregnant, and we didn’t want the hassle of viewings etc whilst trying to prepare for a baby/deal with a newborn. Plus we liked her and the flat is perfect for her- a good size, its own little patio, quiet neighbourhood, bus stop outside with a route to town centre and supermarket.

She eventually finds a buyer, we get a memo of sale and start looking. Found a place recently, made an offer, it’s accepted and we get the ball rolling. Hoping for a quick transaction as we’re desperate to get out of the home that’s way too small for us, and our vendors are in a hurry as they’re moving for a job promotion/relocation that’s in danger of being withdrawn if they can’t move.

Until today. Buyer asked to come and see the flat again last week, no real reason given, just to have another look. My spidey senses start tingling but DH said we had no real reason not to let her so we go through all the faff of getting it looking like it isn’t lived in by a family with a 4 and 2 year old and a newborn (this mostly involves using our cars for storage). It turns out this time she’s brought her other daughter with her who wasn’t here at the first viewing- and this daughter, according to the EA, spent the entire time being rude, slagging the place off, and said if her mum wanted to buy it they might as well put her in a home (EA later spoke to buyer’s son who said that sounded fairly typical of her). Apparently buyer was saying she liked it, she wanted to buy it, and she’d given us our word and wasn’t going to pull out for no reason.

Except today, that’s exactly what she’s done. She’s pulled out of buying our place and also of selling her own. By the sounds of it her daughter has spent the whole weekend working on her, saying she should just have her house adapted instead etc etc. The EA obviously did his best (buyer’s house was listed with them too so he’s lost two sales in one go) but it’s dead in the water, just like that. I cried, my DH cried, our vendors too were apparently devastated when the news reached them and our buyer’s buyer was also said to be mightily pissed off.

I just feel so angry, and sad, and worried. We need to get out of this flat. Our DC need to be able get more than a few feet away from each other - they fight and scream constantly and my and DH’s nerves are in shreds. And basically thanks to one stroppy bitch who clearly had more than half an eye on her inheritance, the plans of 3 families including at least 5 children have gone to crap, not to mention three months and thousands of pounds already wasted in the process. But our buyer just walks away scot free.

You seem like a nice person.

Please do not apologise ! Just ignore the hate filled people . You should see the hate I got last year when I said I was thinking about having a 4 th child in a 4 bedroom house . Like sharing a bedroom with a sibling is some sort of child torture 🙄

Oh come on! It's not their fault you went ahead and had a third child in a "tiny" flat.
And it's not for you to judge what counts as a "crappy" reason for pulling out.

😂😂 I am a lovely person thanks……

I agree, the UK system is all wrong, I went through a nightmare house sale. Guy buying my house disappeared on the day we were supposed to get keys, and we still had to give him a two week grace period! Meanwhile if everything does go smoothly everyone's supposed to move out and in on the same day? Madness when you think about the chain of money reaching on account to another ,if it's a long chain it could go on till late! Where do you live now out of interest if you don't mind.... Need to find an escape route 😂😂😂

No advice, you're right to feel absolutely devastated. It's a terrible system, I've been in a similar situation and my world fell apart. I'm so sorry for you x

There's no penalty until contracts are exchanged. That's the point of penalties.

Before that it's just negotiating.

Its the biggest purchase most people will ever make. No one should be penalised for reconsidering their position until they've committed to exchange.

The brother clearly wanted her to sell, the sister didn't. Both may have equally valid reasons, none of which are required to be disclosed. All you are entitled to know is the decision.

The estate agent just wanted to make their commission and was willing to pressure an old lady to do it, I feel zero sympathy for them.

Just take a deep breath, remarket it and try to keep as emotionally detached as possible until you get to the point of exchange.

Yes there should be some sort of penalty.
My sister and I were selling our mum's house, the potential buyer had viewed the property, made an offer, we accepted and all the paperwork done when they pulled out literally at the last second. Because they suddenly didn't like the permit parking! The permit parking that they knew about before viewing the property, they saw what it was like when they viewed the property and it was still there when they made the offer!! And we still had to pay our solicitor hundreds for the work they'd done regardless of the fact the property hadn't sold. It's just an absolute joke.

I’m sorry, but this is bollocks. Of course it’s personal. It’s not some corporation acquiring office space. This is people’s homes, their lives, their futures. It doesn’t get more personal than that!

I feel for you, we were in a 2 bed flat with 3 children and it’s tough. I hope it works out for you soon.

With regards to the Scottish system, I don’t have any personal experience and this is anecdotal but my brother bought a house in Scotland last week and that had fallen through twice before he bought it so surely people can and do pull out before exchange?

I can sympathise wholeheartedly with you! We sold our last year, took 3 sets of buyers. First buyers: we accepted the offer, and put an offer on a house we loved. 6 weeks into process, they come round with a builder, point out things that were extremely obvious on their first two viewings and try to drop their offer. We wouldn’t budge, so lost the buyer. Back on the market and accepted an offer from a couple almost immediately, so we still had our purchase progressing thankfully! Within two weeks those buyers decided they didn’t want to leave London for west wales and pulled their offer! Back on the market it went, and sold within a couple of weeks again. However the vendors of the house we were buying decided not to sell as they were worried about changes in the mortgage rates (understandably) and so our purchase fell through!
we continued our sale, as we were desperate to leave, and have ended up renting off family for the time being. Fortunately we are now in the process of buying a real fixer upper, so we are in the best position to do it up and not have to move straight in, so all working out in the end. But with two young children it’s been a stressful couple of years! I definitely think there should be repercussions for people who pull out of house sales after a certain amount of time has passed (before exchange of contracts) there is so much money and time wasted, and it can be utterly soul destroying!

It’s a business transaction in the sense that money is exchanged for a property. They aren’t buying your house out of the kindness of their hearts and you aren’t selling yours out of the kindness of yours, it’s a business transaction. No one is going to do it unless it benefits them.

It’s not a great system but unfortunately until exchange anyone can pull out for any reason. I agree it should be changed.

But without meaning to sound harsh, your home / life / future means nothing to the people buying. What's important when buying property is whether it's the right one for them. Not the vendors personal circumstances. It's a trade for money.

If I'm buying a property and something happens to me which means it's no longer suitable or I find something wrong with the property, yes I'd pull out too. The vendors personal circumstances don't come into it. In your case for example, I highly doubt the potential buyer is doing it just to spite you.

As I said, I get how tough it is.

What a nightmare! I’d be seeking some sort of compensation for money spent in all this! I really feel for you, not quite the same as I’m a council tenant but when we tried to swap our home the first time round we were 2 days away from signing our tenancies over and the lady who was due to take ours pulled out. I was absolutely devastated. We’d sold furniture so as to make space and lessen the load come moving day, I’d handed my notice in at work as well as found new schools for my 3 children. Like you the children were too close in proximity in the flat which just ended up in tears and fights. The lady couldn’t care less. About a year later we eventually found someone else and the original lady sends me a message 3 weeks after moving asking if I’m still interested. I almost cried laughing and told her “too late! Had you said yes the first time round you’d have got lucky!” People are ruthless and selfish and don’t care what their actions mean to others. I really hope you find someone trustworthy and get into your new home soon!

It could well be that the daughter has prevented her mother from buying a flat that is unsuited to her needs, despite the son pressing her to go ahead.

I don't think that's an 'invalid' reason and, as you also find yourselves in a property that is unsuited to your needs, I'm surprised you are not more sympathetic.

just a word about how wonderful other countries’ systems are.

I’ve bought and sold two houses in France, the process is very similar to England. They do have a ‘sellers’ pack, rather like the one which Ed Balls tried to inflict on England, with a state vetted ( that is, someone buys a licence to do it) inspection and report…..except that no one takes any notice of it. The buyer still goes round , often with a builder, and inspects for themselves, because why should you trust anyone else’s word when this is hundreds of thousands of £ or €? If you are borrowing money, the lender needs to try to secure their loan by making sure it has a functioning roof etc. They can’t take the vendors’ word for it ( nor the borrowers). It’s just an extra expense, like the now defunct scheme to make everyone have a breathalyser in their car.

Actually, there is ten days when either party can pull out for any reason after signing the equivalent of the contract! so even more tense than England.

The searches in UK are not irrelevant, they can be the only thing which stops you buying a house which the neighbour is intending to deprive of light by building a monster extension.

As PP have said, there is no English system, it’s a private contract ( unlike in France where you have to have a state notary involved to collect the purchase tax). As long as you can legally transfer the title, it’s yours to buy and sell as you please. The ‘system ‘ has just evolved because that is how most people want or need to do it.

I won’t go into the Italian system where people used to leave the notary’s office and discuss the real price because they were avoiding the property tax….this may of course be a myth, or just my friend’s unique experience.

A small, ground floor flat in a quiet safe neighbourhood, with its own private patio, three single women as neighbours, a bus stop right outside with a service into town and supermarket and a gorgeous park over the road, is less suited to the needs of an 80 something woman looking to downsize than a 2 up 2 down terrace on a main road next to a secondary school and a pub?! Nope, I don’t think so.

This is heartbreaking but calling the daughter a stroppy bitch is uncalled for.

Terrible market but in future do not take it off the market post offer unless and until the buyer provides a 5-10% non refundable deposit.

The English system puts far too much risk on the seller IMHO.

As a minimum there should be a few things normalised such as surveys prior to offer and not taking properties off the market until exchange.

We had our fingers burnt by a buyer who fannied around for months before pulling put at the last minute.

They had all sorts of ridiculous demands (replacing a broken alarm system, warranty for the loft ladder, we had to tell them 3 times their surveyor mistook a house martin nest for a wasp nest and we would NOT remove it).

My parents and their 4 house chain managed to drag a house sale out for 6 months due to everyone being slow and indecisive.

Why did you choose to have so many children so close together in such unsuitable accommodation? I do sympathise but that's your own fault surely 🤷🏻‍♀️

@IHearTheTickingOfTheClock

Unlikely to sell. There's good reason the process to buy something for hundreds of thousands takes a while, and compromises, to finalise.

Buyers will walk away if asked for a non refundable deposit.

You’ve got to take the emotion out of it. She’s entirely within her legal and moral rights to withdraw from a sale. They may not have disclosed every tiny detail to you.

That being said, moving home is one of the most stressful life events, so I’m not surprised you’re finding it difficult with 3 small children. Much sympathy!

Thank goodness you’re here… 🙄

I think your mistake here was to accept an offer from someone who hadn’t sold and couldn’t proceed!