To think it’s rude not to respond?

[billiesunset]

Organising a meet up with the four women I went to uni with (not seen each other as a group since covid). It’s taken ages to find a date that works - but one didn’t bother to even acknowledge the suggestion of a meet up and never read the texts.

She did respond before the suggestion of the meet up to give us a life update etc

And just to say she of course doesn’t have to come (evidence suggests she doesn’t want to) but to blatantly ignore the messages I think is a pretty shitty thing to do. Aibu?

And so?
If people live very far apart the meetup's likely to take place on a weekend. A limited number of those each month. Travel, kids' competitions, etc a lot of those are likely to be booked out already.

It's different from, say drinks at the pub after work.

Maybe she doesn't want to commit to a lunch that far in advance? I wouldn't. Anything could happen. I would, however, have just told you that already. Give her a bit of time, I guess.

We started off discussions with earlier dates and it always clashed with something but she never took part in those discussions and I could completely understand someone turning around and saying I don’t want to commit to something so far in advance.

Have you tried calling her? Perhaps she is ill, or busy. Perhaps she has just got a new phone. If you don't backup Whatsapp before changing phone you lose all the messages - it catches people out all the time.

OP is ignoring the posts about her other thread because she changed username and has been caught out.

in general, i would say you are very easily offended OP based on both your threads.

We do live far apart so yeah you’re completely right and it’s never going to happen in the week with jobs and childcare. It had to be a weekend and it was crazy the amount of clashes, I’m already going to events in July because the tickets were released that early. I have a group of friends where we’ll text on the day “let’s do dinner tonight” and it just works but this situation is totally different.

Ah no that's someone else sorry! Different usernames.

We just don’t have a call and talk type relationship. I do with other friends but some it would just be weird iykim

Surely texts are WhatsApp? If I say I will text you, it will be through WhatsApp, same for people saying it to me.

I don’t know anyone, including elderly relatives, who use any other way to message each other

It is the same person. They changed usernames and are mad they've been caught out, they've ignored every single comment calling them out on the 2 threads and bullshit lol.

Seems very rude to me I'm 40's and still believe in manners but I have dc of uni age and manners don't seem to occur to them, even with their friends.

Texts and WhatsApps are different things you might use the same word but that doesn't mean they are the same and your small circle of people not sending texts doesn't mean that it's not totally normal for other people to send them

What do you call the 2FA messages you get for online sign ins?

Nope.

Texts and WhatsApp messages are different platforms.

If I say I'll text someone, then I send a text.
If I say I'll WhatsApp them, I'll send a WhatsApp message.
If I say I'll message them then I might use text, WhatsApp, FB messenger, dm on Twitter, dm on Signal or another platform.

I found the initial posts where text and WhatsApp were used interchangeably to be quite confusing.

as frustrating as it is when people don’t respond ( I get annoyed too) but… she may be depressed or broke or socially anxious or just anxious or not want to do a f2f meeting
there may be someone in the group she’s not so keen on - she may not like the dynamic of the group and never voiced this … all kinds of reasons … or she may just be rude !

your small circle of people not sending texts doesn't mean that it's not totally normal for other people to send them

Lol, patronising much 😂

Was just a question as not something I (and my “small circle”) do so was interested

Yes I think it is rude. I am in a group of 6 women who meet up from time to time. One never posts or responds, but will sometimes turn up and sometimes not. I find it inexplicable to behave like that.