Woman passively outed for shoplifting and I did nothing?

[Juliesdagger]

Weird one that’s rolling in my mind as I’m wondering if I should have stepped in ☹️
busy well known coffee shop in a supermarket this morning. As I was queuing, a man in front of me said loudly to the lady paying at the till “don’t forget the crisps you’ve got” as he spoke so loudly it was hard not to then hear the rest - she looked confused and said what crisps? I’m just getting my coffee” and again in a loud voice the man said “the crisps you put in your shopping bag” again the woman looked bemused, looked down at her carrier bag and said oh gosh they must have fallen in when I got my phone” (or similar, I didn’t get the exact words) and took them out to be scanned. She looked a bit upset and I heard her apologising to the barista at the till saying they were for her kid’s snack and she couldn’t believe she’d nearly forgotten to pay for them. The man who had called her out then started scoffing loudly saying “oh yeah, that happens to me allllll the time, things just fall into my bag and I forget about them” and smirking and rolling his eyes, clearly insinuating she had stolen them or tried to. The woman just looked clearly flustered and by this time had paid and she left looking like she was going to cry.

I then to my surprise saw the man leave
the queue (despite him being next in line to order) and head for the staff only door so he must work there! And was only waiting in line to see if she paid at the till for the crisps.

it’s been playing on my mind all day. The woman was clearly upset but I would have been too if I’d Been passively accused like that 🤷‍♀️I know you can’t type cast but she was buying an overpriced coffee and pastry, the crisps couldn’t have cost more
than £0.60 extra 🤷‍♀️and she looked well dressed, a bit flustered but not wonder and really just like your
average mum rushing Round supermarket etc so I guess I’m doubting if she was stealing? And I feel bad I didn’t challenge that It felt unprofessional of this man who clearly worked there to passively accuse her?

or am I being naive and she likely was attention to shoplift for a reason I can’t fathom?

Well the definition of a customer is "a person who buys goods or services from a shop or business" she had to be reminded to buy all the goods she had, and initially tried to deny that she knew she had them then decided she knew and forgot she had them, but intended to pay (once she realised she'd been observed) without the 'boisterous' intervention of the employee she wouldn't have been a customer, but a thief.

Businesses can do without thieves, even ones who try and hide behind intending to be a customer once caught being a thief. The customer is always right doesn't trump the fact that stealing is illegal.

You absolutely did the right thing. Small businesses have to literally work so hard to survive.
if people have to shoplift I think it’s disgusting to do it to small businesses

People shoplift for various reasons many of which are totally unrelated to poverty. If this woman gets a kick from.the thrill of transgression then a coffee shop with ridiculous mark-ups charging £4 for a drink that costs 50p to make is a relatively "ethical" target. She was embarrassed about being caught but she's clearly guilty and was lucky the shop didn't take it further. It sounds like she probably did it before and the staff member recognised her and created this situation as an opportunity to warn her off. Bags of crisps do not fall into shopping bags unnoticed.

A woman was caught trying to steal a non essential item when buying her overpriced coffee. It is hardly Oliver Twist.

Even if she did drop it in her bag by mistake and it was a bit embarrassing, far worse things happen to people all the time. This is very low down on the scale.

My take is that there are two possibilities.

One is that it was deliberate.

The other is that she had other things on her mind and put them in her bag without thinking.

However, none of us know the whole story so put it to bed and forget about it.

The Police don't get involved with shoplifters with goods under the value of £200. The staff member was obviously on some kind of power trip tho'. She might have regularly stolen Bags of crisps ...

That's a tough one. They probably get a lot of people stealing things. I work in retail and shop lifting has gone up a lot in the last 6 months. They don't hide it very well either. I must admit most of the time it isn't the well dressed.
It might only have been a packet of crisps, but with our shop, it started our with a small item, they didn't get caught, so they come back for more.
It might have been a middle age woman, who forgot, with brain fog, or just been stressed. The employee wouldn't have known. It's sadly part of the job, we cannot tackle shop lifters, just ask them to pay or put it back.

Or maybe she's on the edge of a nervous breakdown, who knows

Where DB lives with his family in Hackney there’s a local Tescos. I’ve seen at least one person take a full basket of shopping there once or twice scan it all through, pack it up and then leg it! Very fast.

Our local Sainsbury’s about one has a receipt scanner to exit after using self service. The other one tried this but it didn’t work. The third one doesn’t have a receipt scanner.

Not for "no reason". We are paying for shoplifters too.

The second possibility is unlikely. She said the crisps were intended for her son, so she knew "what crisps" and she knew they were in her bag. She intended to leave without paying for them.

We all - including honest people who struggle to make ends meet - pay for shoplifters. She does not deserve sympathy or excuses. She's a thief and as others have said, the staff were probably already looking out for her.

Do u no if she has form is shoplifting from this store a regular occurance arde the staff paying shortfall from their wages do u no the background of this scenario or just a slightly overheard snippet

Quite right!
Its not difficult to treat people with a bit of common decency.

I recommend some people on here never go to Australia where people asking to look in your bags before you leave a shop is pretty normal, even if you bought stuff.

We had a guy in our shop the other night, can't in walked round, had a nice chat with our staff, bought some cigarettes, large wad of cash, then he went and looked round the shop again, except he didn't just look he stole about 5 things with a nearly equivalent retail value to the cigarettes. People nicking broadly what they pay for is common. Some of our most prolific thieves were also surprisingly high spenders if you looked at them over weeks/months

Don’t see harm in him saying ‘don’t forget to pay for the crisps’.. but the comments after we’re uncalled for.
I wouldn’t have said anything in your position, non of your business

Additionally I see more vigorous defence of this middle class looking woman (I accept we don’t know her race but I’m going to assume white or it would’ve been mentioned probably) who was caught red handed, than I did than on the thread for the black woman and her child who were wronglyaccused of not having a bus ticket and manhandled by the police.

Absolutely.

A member of the New Zealand parliament has been arrested for three counts of high end shoplifting. Golritz Ghaharaman, an alleged Iranian refugee was elected because she was on a Green Party MMP list. No one actually voted for her inin the free world. what has to be the most undemocratic electoral system in the free world. She is the one sitting down. In front of her is a Mexican refugee who was elected in the same process.

Gosh - judge, jury and executioner.

Like I said, we don’t know the facts so you can’t make a judgement on it.

He actually shouldn't have and you can sue if a shop accuses you publicly before you've left the shop so it certainly was unprofessional. But worked out well for the woman if it was an accident that she dropped them in.

I'm genuinely surprised by this can you show us any examples of people suing shops because someone asked them not to steal something?

It feels really counterintuitive somehow

A friend who works in a large shop says mums with prams are the biggest shoplifters. They slip things in the basket under. Just because I (and you) didn't do it, doesn't mean people who look just like us don't!

Everyone is so outraged by woman allegedly stealing and a busy unpaid body, humuiliating her into paying but are pefectly alright with the price increase in everyting every time they shop. Misery truly loves company, and fighting each other is the perfect way to keep us all there.

They probably see dozens of people every day shoplifting - that woman probably was! Not sure it means anything her being well dressed and looking upset!

Can you also sue them for reminding you to pay?