We have recently moved to a new house. Technically it’s DP’s house as she bought it, but I live here too. We don’t have curtains on the living room windows yet. For context, we live in the countryside. There are no houses overlooking our living room.
The afternoon I have come into the living room and switched on a floor lamp so that I can read my book as it’s beginning to get dark. DP came into the living room about 5-10 minutes after me and sat down on the other sofa with her laptop.
She commented “I hate having this light on, being under the spotlight”. I explained that I wanted to read my book, and that I need the light on. She basically said it would be reasonable for me to offer to read for 30 minutes and then to switch the light off once it got properly dark (as there would be an increased “spotlight” effect in the total darkness). I said that I wouldn’t expect her to use her laptop for 30 minutes and then switch it off just because it didn’t suit me, and I pointed out that she could also choose to sit in the other room if she didn’t want to be in a room that was lit up. She then got angry with me, saying I was telling her where she could and couldn’t be in her house.
I said, “that’s not what I’m saying, you’re perfectly welcome here but I need the light on as I’m reading so I mean if you don’t want to be in a room with the lamp on”. She said, “oh thanks, you’re telling me I’m welcome in my own house!”
who is being unreasonable?