to think my aunt, in a care home, should be allowed more than one shower a week?

[LuluBlakey1]

My aunt is 92 and has been in a care home for 4 weeks for respite care. The fees are £1300 a week. It emerged this morning that residents are only bathed or showered once a week. She washes herself with a flannel and soap every day- no help is available for this.

I asked the question of the 'senior' on duty and was told it is all they can manage and there is a rota. Some residents have alzheimers/dementia and can be difficult and some have medical conditions so must have more baths/showers. In the month she has been there she has never had a bath- not enough time for that and has only had 4 showers.

I was horrified. I thought they must be short staffed but apparently not.

AIBU to think if you are paying £1300 a week for a care home, you should have the choice of a bath or shower every day?

My mum had dementia but still had her own en-suite and tv. It doesn’t seem that you are getting much for the money.

It's what I do now, it's my routine along with a daily shower. It's also what I did when I was in hospital after a stroke.What do you do??

do you have anything like "home instead" in your area they are more expensive but do hour long visits and will get proper meals etc

I on the other hand hate baths, and never feel clean after one (not that I've had one for many, many, years).

OP, I agree that a once a week shower doesn't sound great, I believe it's every three days in the home my late DM was in, but there simply are not enough staff - or hours in the day - for them to shower all the residents daily. It takes much longer to help a person in care to shower, and sometimes more than one helper. They really don't need daily showering anyway, as they aren't doing much in the way of physical exercise.

I dread to think how the "I must have two showers a day or I don't feel clean" people are going to cope when it's their time to move into care

I don't think a daily bath is practical because it probably needs 2 X carers to help a person in and out. A shower should be available more frequently though as 1 X carer could help with that.

My Aunt was in a nice care home like this too also self funded but well over £2300. Plus Hair Dresser, Nail Technician, Ice Creams etc extra. We used to take her out for a cream tea or to walk around the gardens.

In my mam’s care home it was a few times a week, though she was bed bathed towards the end.

When she was able, I used to put her in the bath. She used to like that.

I would expect more than once a week.

I wish someone could shoot me if I have to go to a home. There was also the court case of the carers who were abusing an elderly woman.

All this, and pay thousands for the privilege.

Fuck that.

It sounds awful and expensive

Jesus actual Christ. My mum is in a care home and is showered daily with help. She is private but there are people there who aren't. I would think this is a basic requirement, a need not a nice to have.

To the pp who made the comment about it being good all the carers in a particular home were 'white' with local accents - sorry but can black & Asian carers not be British with British accents too?? How racist!
And also I know many good foreign carers & nurses with foreign accents actually!!

Oh wow I am so not looking forward to being old. I can’t stand getting dressed unless I’ve had my daily shower.

Yuk yuk yuk

That's depressing. I don't want to get old if that's how it is.

Where does the £1300 go - I don't believe food is anything special, they don't pay the staff much more than minimum wage, rooms are tiny (like a student residence).

I think £5k a month should enable care homes to pay for enough carers to carry out basic hygiene for residents.

I'm so confused by once a week washing. I'm going to be graphic here but how does a man get cleaned under his foreskin and how does a woman get all her nooks and crannies properly clean with a damp flannel? If I need a quick wash mid day eg when I'm seeing my waxer or having a smear test later in the day, I squat wash in a plastic bowl. A damp flannel would not do the job. Actual water and cleanser.

My mum is in a nursing home, been there for nearly two years. She needs full care, and can’t stand. She has washes daily, but only one bath in the time she’s been there!
The staff said she didn’t like it, so never tried it again.

It’s funny because they say that about a lot of things that take time/effort.

Why wouldn't you feel clean after a shower? This is the weirdness thing I've read on mumsnet. People who shower don't just stand limp under running water. They use soap and a flannel, sponge and/or hands to rub

So people paying are subsidising other residents? That can't be right. Why would some people be paying for other people?

I've never heard such nonsense about elderly people having one bath or shower a week as what they are used to. My parents (80's) showered daily when I was a child and my mother still does. My father who died a couple of years ago was bathed daily in his care home. The home was wonderful and ensured his dignity to the very end.

Yes, my mum showered daily in her 80s but when she has a shower now it takes about 40 minutes. In a care home there would be two carers doing it. They haven't the staff to spend 40 minutes x 2 on one-to-one care like that.

@redheadsaregreat - fellow ginger, love the name. Sorry this is long, but my understanding of the current position where I live.

As I understand it , with care homes here, there is a headline price; the newly opened one in my town is £2300 per week.
You can book yourself in at that rate , plus extras for hairdressing etc. if you can prove you have 2 years worth of capital to pay for your place.

If you are subject to a care assessment, your contributions will be assessed based on your available funds. In Scotland if you have more than £32750 in savings/ house value, you will pay the £2300 less whatever the care assessment says you need for personal care, which is free in Scotland. It’s about £200. So you are then paying £2100, and the council pays the balance.
if you need nursing care, the council pays another £100 , so you pay £2000. The home will get your state pension so you end up paying £1900 or so per week.while the state pays about £100, and the council £300. Home will still get its £2300

But if you have zero savings above £32750,, the council pays whatever their agreed rate is - it’s about £850 per week. So in that case the home gets the £850 plus the £100 ( circa £950) or so state pension, for the very same type of room that the private funder pays £2300 per week for. Home gets the £950. Swallows the ‘loss’ or basically subsidises the funded residents.

It has recently been an issue locally as the NHS and council needed to buy space at several local care homes, for palliative care and dementia care to free up hospital beds, and that is the maximum they can pay.

All numbers are approximate by the way.

I am not in this field but had to do my research for a relative.

But it wouldn't take 40 mins with carers. Patient sits on stool in shower cubical. Carers use hand held shower head to wash patient. Its quick. It has to be to ensure patient doesn't get chilly

Bathing is quite a flash point with a lot of older adults in care homes, some of the residents get quite violent in their resistance.

At least you would know it was done properly, and with care.

It's down to whether the person wants a shower/bath. Good care is formed from patient choice and clinical expertise.

I don't think I would want to see my dm naked, I'm too prudish let alone help her shower

Isn't that the whole point of the care home