**TW**To ask someone to help me talk my daughter down from this episode

[ItsDisneyBitch]

I have posted about my daughter before and her voracious reading the news and becoming highly anxious. She is 18 diagnosed with ADD and autism.

today in the daily mail there has been an article on where the best country to be is if there is world war 3, every single news outlet she is poring over is talking about possibility of wars etc.

She had calmed down a little in the past, but is now ramping back up and today I found in her room she is stock piling her meds to take if there is nuclear war.

not just her antidepressants but I’ve noticed she has siphoned off other random pills, paracetamol etc.

can somebody with some knowledge of the current situation please help me explain so it’s not just her mum talking. A reply here would be great. I’m very sorry I’m worried sick about her again and I’m reluctant to take her back to the hospital as no immediate threat to her ‘right now’. But I will call doctor tomorrow.

Your post is a bit unclear. Is she just storing medication somewhere? Is the medication risky/controlled? How is she acquiring it? Does it involve theft or deception? Is it something she can just buy from the shop? Is there risk of overdose or serious side effects? It is a situation for a medical professional either way, just that it may be urgent depending on specifics. If all above board, is it really a big deal if she is has extra medication for a rainy day - how much extra are we talking? Maybe just talk to her about how much is a reasonable amount to have on hand.

Reason doesn’t help with anxiety disorders that are in full flow. She should take her rescue medication or see her doctor.

What help is she getting for her anxiety and the obsessive behaviour, if any?

Can you go with logic: journalists over egg headlines to sell papers. If the headline was “a couple of countries are having a disagreement” it wouldn’t grab anyone’s attention. Big bold scary statements sell.

She has been putting her medication she is on sertraline and medikinet away, so three strips of each, then she had taken boxes of paracetamol, ibuprofen, the dog’s medication out of the cupboard and hidden them with it.

her plan is to take it all if there is a war.

I hadn’t noticed the paracetamol etc going missing se we have all had flu/covid etc over the last few weeks do thought they were being just taken in the house.

I’m by no means an expert and am aware that this advice may not work for everyone, but my DS is also autistic, with a tendency to catastrophise.

He hates any kind of ‘dumbing down’ and once he’s got an idea in his head won’t be talked out of it. If he’d read the article (and I know the one you mean), telling him ‘not to worry’, or ‘it’s all just hypothetical’ wouldn’t work.

With that in mind, could you try to talk to her openly about how it make her feel, and why?

Is it that she’s scared as she doesn’t live in one of those countries? What particularly is she scared about? Dying? Why? (I know that sounds morbid, but certainly for us, digging down - not spiralling, but really trying to understand the fear - tends to work well). Then, one you understand it, what could you do together to mitigate those fears? Why is hoarding meds not a good approach? Etc…

I would lock away anything that isn't prescribed for her eg the paracetamol, dogs medicine etc. And then maybe only have out a small supply of her own meds.

I think you should look up articles on media scare mongering tactics in order to sell papers and show them to her.

For instance: https://www.sourcepr.co.uk/fear-mongering-in-the-media/

Also, how would she react if you asked her to limit her phone/computer use to 1 or 2 hours a day? Just so that she's not constantly scrolling and worrying.

She was supposed to have been moved to adult mental health after being dismissed by camhs late last year. I’ve been calling weekly to see when she can expect her next/first appointment and no one is helping.

I’ve tried the headlines are there to sell newspapers etc. but she said mum it’s everywhere and it really is! I don’t know if there is someone that I can talk to her that maybe would help me talk to her.

Is there a crisis team you can access?

She is at uni lives at home still so it’s difficult for me to police her usage when she is there and I’m at work.

Your first post made it sound like she was stockpiling to survive a war, the reality is she is stockpiling in order to overdose. I would be calling the crisis team. Who knows at what point or what could trigger her to decide to try.

Ah. With your updates, I take back my ‘talk if all through’ advice. Call the crisis team. She has a plan. That’s a medical emergency in my opinion.

Doesn’t sound like she intends to overdose. But you can’t reason her out of this. She needs professional help. When you say she’s stockpiling has she stopped taking her medication?

She says she doesn’t want to die now and she will share the pills to anyone who survives the bombs. She is stockpiling as she thinks we are all better off dead if that happens.

the medicine has all been removed and put away where she can’t get to it.

I can completely understand her getting fixated on something as a dad of an autistic son I totally understand.

I would say to her yes there is a lot going on in the world right now but these tend to be regional conflicts hyped up by the media.

We are not likely to go to war we are an island with one of the best navy's in the world so even in the unlikely event of a war breaking out the chances of reaching us are very slim.

Explain also we have very strong missile defence so we would even be protected from the air and we are a nuclear superpower so it's very unlikely anyone would be stupid enough to try.

I'm unclear by 'take it all' if you mean she intends to overdose, or take it with her and run away?

Where is she getting the extra prescription drugs to hide away, is she not taking her meds and is hiding them instead or has she managed to get hold of extra somehow?

It sounds like she's very much in crisis, do you have mental health team contacts for an emergency? I know some areas it's a case of going to A&E, which isn't ideal at all.

I think she has been siphoning off strips of it. She has one packet on her desk of current meds but that may have been to throw me off the scent.

Remove the paracetamol now and say you’ll store it. That’s not a discussion.

Lock away all other pain meds.

You’d be hard put to harm yourself permanently on the rest.

Read her Adrian Mole on war anxiety. Yes, really.

I’ve seen a very irresponsible click-baity piece on the mail about the “ten US cities most likely to be under attack in the event of a nuclear war” - is that the one she read? Honestly it’s absolute bollocks. It draws on existing conflicts and takes a leap to imagining what would happen in the event of a nuclear war which no one is seriously talking about. Sure, the world is a shit show. There are localised (if spreading) conflicts and wars. But a world war that draws in nuclear powers and Britain? No, we are not there. Tell her to read better sources, stay away from the Daily Mail, and generally improve her understanding as a way of processing her anxiety in a better and more productive way.

So she’s not taking the medication as prescribed? Contact the prescribed ASAP.

I think she has gone down a rabbit hole with it all and I guess the more you look the more you find.

Does she have an OCD diagnosis? I do and I’ll get totally fixated on certain things and can’t be talked down from it. Has she had any CBT?

Does the adult mental health team have a duty worker you can speak to? I know our local one does.

I'd probably give them a ring in the morning and ask to speak to someone especially as it sounds like she hasn't been taking her medication as prescribed if she is hiding some away

She is no longer in therapy no help since camhs ‘passed her on’.

I forgot to add that the doomsday clock is apparently being updated next week? This is also something that is playing on her mind.

When she gets like this I tend to sleep on the floor in her room with her.