To expect a private space for private Pilates class?

[pilatespilatespilates]

Hi all, completely prepared to be told I'm BU - not quite sure how this all normally works. I've been doing 1-on-1 pilates classes with an instructor for a few months now. The classes are really expensive, but the privacy is worth it for me as I have body image issues, binge eating disorder and social anxiety. The instructor and I always have the small studio to ourselves and if the privacy wasn't available, to be totally honest my mental health is so bad I wouldn't go.

It's a small business and the owner of the studio has previously said the arrangement is fine, but I have to slot in around the studio schedule. That's fine, I've been really flexible.

However, my original instructor's moved and the new instructor doesn't really "get it". She's said a couple of times things like "you'd be totally fine keeping up in a group class now" "You should book into some group classes over the Christmas break".

She's just let me know there'll be other people in the studio at the same time as our next lesson.

The thought of it is causing me stress. AIBU to expect a private space to exercise in when paying for a private class?

Maybe the arrangement's not working for them anymore and I should find a private provider that teaches from home or something. Or am I throwing the baby out with the bathwater.

The change isn’t going to suit you, so find something else. It’s your money.

Just tell her that you're more comfortable being in the studio alone and you'll cancel this weeks and wait until there is a slot where the studio is free.

I sympathise with your need to have a private space, but I don't think at all that you should expect it as a matter of right just because you have booked a one-to-one session.
On the other hand, the instructor should be tuned into the individual needs of her client and so you should definitely feel entitled to explain how you feel clearly and ask if special arrangements could be made so that you are always alone. If that isn't possible, though, I don't think you have grounds for complaint.

Now you know the basics you could do a zoom class. My instructor started doing zoom during covid and still does it. I don't have a problem doing pilates in a group but doing it over zoom has many advantages.

I wouldn't necessarily expect a 1-to-1 session to be in a private room, no. A bit like how I wouldn't expect a PT to work with a client in a private gym. That said, I have a great deal of sympathy with you and wouldn't join a class (or even have private sessions) for similar reasons. It sounds like it might be better to find someone else who can give you the privacy you need.

Have you told her clearly what the issue is? Sounds like she thinks you’re having private classes to improve your technique rather than because you feel uncomfortable with others.

Sounds like they can’t or won’t accommodate you anymore. Best to find somewhere that will.

Would it work better if you find a tutor where you go to their house or they come to yours?

My Pilates teacher offers private lessons either online or in clients home. He wouldn't pay to hire the studio just for one person as it's not cost effective.

YANBU to want a private space for lessons.
I also wouldn’t want to do zoom Pilates as a lot of the corrections are very subtle and impossible to see online.

I would speak to her & explain this.

However, the studio / small gym I use offers p/t sessions & it's while the facility is in use with different individuals or training sessions underway. It wouldn't be viable for them otherwise.

Do talk to her as maybe it is still possible if you explain - she may just not get it.

I would ask her if she’s fully aware of the reasons you need a private space? If so can she stop trying to persuade you to do group work or do your session in front of others.

I think you can’t expect it but it’s what you need and what you are willing to pay for so I would change instructors
you don’t need this really - I suppose they need the room and make more money they way.

Does she know the reasons behind why you need a private space?

I would take private to mean 1:1. My Dd used to have a private riding lesson with an instructor but shared the riding area with others having ‘ private’ lessons. My neighbour has a pt come to her garden/ home( not wealthy) so is that an option?

It’s common for 1-2-1 to be in shared space

i know it’s an ask but challenge yourself to a group

there is such a range of ability and shapes your anxieties may be unfounded

the social anxiety even though your in a group there’s no interaction with the other people as your all doing the class there’s no need to interact with them

Given the studio already expect you to be accommodating to their schedule in order to have these private sessions I expect this new teacher just doesn’t want to have the same arrangement. I’d tell her that you want exclusive use of the studio during your private sessions. I don’t think you need to go into your reasons if you aren’t comfortable doing that. If they won’t do exclusive use anymore then you find somewhere else.

This. She probably doesn’t fully understand why you do private classes so explain to her.

My original instructor said she'd do a full handover and explain everything. And the new instructor confirmed there'd been an in depth handover - but in saying that I'm not 100% sure she knows the full extent and it's been too hard/awkward to bring up.

At the same time though I find lots of people understand mental health on paper, but still don't really "get it" - so it could be a case of that too. I seem fine and bubbly so what's the problem? sort of thing.

Or she might be under pressure from the studio owner.

I know the only way to find out is to have the conversation, but it's just really hard and awkward as still so much stigma.

Thank you but unfortunately it's not just nervousness, it's more than that

It's probably something that's no longer financially viable but they don't want to say that.

Just to add, although it will be hard for you to transition to a group, it probably is something that you should try to do, since physical exercise is such an important resource for mental health as well as physical.
I am pretty much the same as you in terms of my mental health. For me, the social anxiety is triggered by the very fact of interacting with the instructor and is, if anything, diluted slightly by there being other attenders there. As regards body image issues, I find it valuable to challenge the self-denigrating self=image that I have by placing myslef alongside other bodies of all shapes and sizes (- and by seeing that the leanest are far from certain to be the fittest)

It will cost the same for the studio rental no matter how many people are using it. If 5 (say) instructors are giving 1-2-1 lessons in it, it's obviously a lot less per client than if just one, yours, is able to. I'm sure you could do it, but expect to pay more.

Social anxiety isn't just nervousness

@rwalker you demonstrated the same understanding as the new instructor, well done.

Agree with PP, you can cancel and let her know you’ll wait until the studio is free, but there are thousands of Pilates videos you can follow along to at home via YouTube if that’s better for your MH too.

I’ve been there with body image and binge eating issues. I like YouTube workouts because of it. There’s a woman who does fantastic low impact ones that can really help for the days you’re just not feeling up to a full blown one too

OP. I think you're going to have to tell the instructor you want to carry on but in a private space and you're unable to practice in a shared space. It might be that part of the handover wasn't done very well.