Would you have a baby at 50?

[pumpkinpatch6]

Off the back of the "Do you regret having a baby at 40" thread, would you have a child at 50 assuming you can provide for it emotionally and financially? Obviously medical assistance would be needed.

No way, not for a million. Having one at 39 was very difficult and I feel too old at times. It’s a young persons game.

But I’m not you and you should tread your own path!!

If I found myself accidentally pregnant then I would proceed with the pregnancy (as long as all was fine etc) and have the baby. I wouldn't deliberately set out to become pregnant at that age though.

I had a baby at 46, he is now 14 and I am 60. Don't regret that at all but I wouldn't have had another one at 50, even if I had been able to. I can't say though, what I would have done had I not fallen pregnant for the first time until 50 (had no other children of my own although had stepchildren).

I was going to say no but you said “assuming you can provide for it emotionally and financially” so maybe yes assuming this covers a full time nanny to do all the night feeds 😂

No. I had my 2nd DC at 40 and that was my limit. Physically and emotionally. Also, he's 20 now but being a single parent to a troubled and angry teen was exhausting. I probably would have coped better had I been younger and more energetic. No regrets, though. I love my boy! ❤️

No, it’d be utterly exhausting. I accept I’m privileged to have already had children though. If I hadn’t, I might feel differently and I expect there would be physically fitter 50 year olds who would cope better than I would have.

@SickOfSoreFeet
It’s simply an expression.

Nope.

I think if you hadn’t had previous children it might be fine. You’d potentially be 71 before they were financially independent though.

Hell no!!
Had one in my 20s then again in my 30s. That was enough.

I have more energy now I’m on HRT, so I’d definitely consider fostering or adoption (I’ve done both before), if DH agreed (he won’t).

But to physically go through birth feeling how I did before HRT? No.

Not for me personally as I’d be too exhausted. But if someone was able to and give their child a great start in life then fair play. Just the negative points you’d have to consider too, obviously. None of us know what’s round the corner though.

We had wanted another one, but had given up actively trying. I did decide that a third would be too much though! and took some steps to avoid that.

Re the idea that having a baby can be immediately followed my menopause, I'm sure that's possible.

However, I've also heard that having a child relatively late can go along with a late manopause, and that often people will have periods for another 10 years or so after that last birth.

I'm sure there's a lot of natural variation!

Mum at 38 and 40- I can do it now but no way in 10 years - not the toddler stage

DH and I happily fantasise about our 50s when youngest will be 18 and we can abandon our house and kids to go travelling!

No way would I have kids at 50. But not sure what I would say if I didn’t have them already 🤷🏽‍♀️

Love my DD too, of course. I had her at 37. Both my children have brought me so much joy; honestly they are the best "thing" that's ever happened to me. But parenting is jolly hard work, so much more so as an older single parent.

Absolutely not!! I’m in my early 50s and I feel very different health wise to how I was at 40 (I had DCs in early 30s).
My late mum had me in her early 40s, I had ‘older’ parents who were old fashioned and both had died by the time I was 30.
Men have kids later, but old sperm is not good and they’re not the ones having to give birth or (usually) be the main carer.

Cannot imagine having a baby at 40,let alone 50. I'm exhausted, body is very sore, I think it's peri. In secondary school I had a friend who was a miracle baby when her DM and df were 48 and 54 respectively. Her df died when she was 7 and her DM seemed absolutely ancient when we were 12/13. She was an only child and we are 42 now. She has basically been her dm's carer from a very early age, couldn't go to university, go on holiday for more than a few days or move out. She's still alive and my friends life revolves around her. She has to work low paid jobs so that she can be very local as her DM needs a lot of care. It's so sad really.

You'd hit retirement age before they hit adulthood. I think it's selfish to have a child so late in life.

As well as anything else, the idea of funding university education on a pension is frightening!

The vast majority of people saying no are people who already have children. If you didn't have kids and had wanted them for a long time, then you might feel very different.
Friend (41) is finally pregnant with her 52 year old husband and, when they told me, I almost shuddered at the thought - but that's because I'm sensing light at the end of the tunnel with my own almost-independent kids. For my friends, it's a new and long-awaited adventure.

@Sasqwatch Not even slightly ridiculous - after 35 the risk of miscarriage is higher, as is the risk of complications in both pregnancy and birth. Not to mention other factors such as a higher risk of chromasomal conditions. If women are happy to take these risks then fair enough, but I wasn't so completed my family by age 30.

i adopted a baby at 50 so it's a yes from me.

Nope.
Personal choice obviously, but not something I'd willingly do in a million years.
Am 50 now and, as well as 2 teenagers, I have my mum to care for.
Plus wider family issues (finances/illness/wayward siblings etc), life just seems to get really complicated in middle age (surely this should be getting easier🤔?)...
Add a bit of never ending perimenopause and general feelings of 'I need to get in a cupboard and hide', and it's a magical time already...👉💩
Just the thought of a baby in the mix tips me right over the edge.
Sorry, that sounded really negative - there are also good bits, like the thought of getting a bit of independence back! 😬

I’d rather stick pins in my eyes. In my 50’s and 60’s I want to enjoy handing grandchildren back not raising a baby/toddler again. I want to be sipping cocktails on a sunny beach as far away from the school runs as possible.