People ending their lives?

[girlfriend44]

Are more and more people giving up on life? Heard another suicide today and its going to be debated in Parliament tomorrow?

Is it because mental health services are poor, have they always been poor?
Is life just getting harder for people?
Or has it always been hard?

I can remember when suicide was rare now you hear it so much sadly.

Its sad to think that people are so trapped they cant see a way out.Also sad to think not so many years ago could actually be imprisoned for "Committing Suicide"! None of us know whats happening really with others lives though.Sometimes its hard to go on

Three male friends have died by suicide in the past 10 years, directly due to turn not able to access proper mental health treatment. One walked out of hospital to do it.

There is a crisis in mh treatment. It can take 2 years or more just to access basic therapy. Way too late for some people.

Oh just because I’m special.

🙂

Anyway, it’s a stupid thing to say, nobody has any idea how they’ll feel when they get older. I have a happy and full life, with a wonderful family, lots to keep me busy, and able to do what I like when I like these days. I have friends in nursing homes with dementia, but I also have friends still travelling the world still going to rock concerts (me till very recently).

It's certainly talked about more but I don't think it was necessarily less common in years gone by.

Two of my friends had lost their fathers to suicide. They weren't really allowed to talk about it as it was too shameful, their families said.

Another friend took an overdose in front of me when we were at school. The school refused to give them any help other than allow a teacher to escort them to hospital for a stomach pump. I was told to not be upset by it and stop being silly. Nobody wanted to say "suicide" as that didn't happen in a nice place with nice people.

I do think there are more people in desperate situations. Just finding no way out or if they have tried to access help and haven't had any or it hasn't helped then there is a desperation not to have failed. There is more talk about mental health and how we can improve it, but the implicstion that if you haven't improved then you've failed which can create a viscious circle.

I'm so sorry for all those affected, and who haven't been able to talk about it.

I can remember when suicide was rare

No, you can just remember when suicide was rarely talked about. That's not the same thing.

As the first reply in this thread shows, the suicide rate is much lower than it was in the 70s and 80s. It's just less of a stigmatised subject so is talked about more, and of course people are keen to reduce the rate further by raising awareness of it.

I would also add that the suicide rate in the 70s/80s was probably actually quite a bit higher than we think, because it used to be quite common for coroner's verdicts to be given as something different like 'accidental death' in certain types of suicide case, usually ones where the main breadwinner had left behind a spouse and children who would not receive a life insurance pay-out if the deceased was ruled to have died by suicide.

I'm like you

Please can you send me the link to the website?

A terrorist commits their crimes with the sole purpose of deliberately injuring or killing as many other people as they can. They are not in pain, they are trying to make a political statement. It's not remotely comparable because the intentions are entirely different.

Interesting. Didn't realise this. So it was as common just not talked about.

I take life in five year increments at this point. Disability and chronic illness has meant that, for me, that's reality. Makes it easier to face it all and try my best to make life worthwhile. But I have no desire to be here if the illness takes away every bit of my quality of life and mental health. That would be meaningless.

Indeed

Back in the day (even up to the 60s I THINK) survivors of suicide attempts were put in prison for the Act.
Like they needed Prison on top of whatever else drove them to the brink of death by their own hand
Awful

One of my relatives caused serious trauma to strangers when they took their own life (think train tracks)
My other relative seriously traumatised and endangered others (motorway bridge) They did it knowing that other people would get hurt. It was a complete shock, but it came to light afterwards that they'd been planning it for months and had the presence of mind to get all of their financial affairs in order.
I believe that they were in mental turmoil, but theyd never even attempted to get help or told anyone how they were feeling. Seeing the clarity in which they came to the decision, the things they did to prepare over months and yet still decide to destroy the lives of their loved ones and potentially strangers, it's very hard not to agree with the analogy.

Suicide has never been rare, not even in my grandparents lifetime and they were born 100+ years ago. But it was a lot more taboo up until quite recently and was even illegal at one time. Thankfully people talk about it more, they discuss mental health more, there is more sympathy. But we have a long way to go in society and mental healthcare is woeful and just getting worse. Waiting lists longer than ever and services overwhelmed.

@MillicentMaybe well clearly you do think you're special, it's great your health & your life are good, but how about you let other people make their own decisions about their own lives? She's not suggesting any one does it.

It used to be that everything possible would be done to avoid saying that someone had killed themselves. For instance my grandmother completed suicide in 1985 after trying on and off for 50 odd years (due to severe MH issues). Even though it was totally obvious what she had done, her death was recorded as death by misadventure as it 'couldn't be proved' that was her intention.

Oh for goodness sake, stop taking life so bloody seriously. People can do what they like, I can do what I like, and I can hold whatever opinions I like. Incidentally, I never said one word about my health.

Now off you pop and have a wee ride on your high horse.

I’m not sure. However, I’ve heard of 3 men (one approx late 20s) and the other mid to late 40s, latter both married with children. Both said or were said to have had mental health issues, depression and maybe financial.

I do think people don’t talk about problems much or solutions like therapy. Men in particular.

It is unbelievably sad for me as my best friend ended her life in her early 30s but she was probably bi polar, under the care of her mental health time and they’d given her a huge incorrect dose for the past 3 years. You never get over it.

We understand that many serious physical illnesses have a death rate and that some illnesses remain untreatable even with all possible medical intervention. Might it be that it is also true of severe mental health problems? That no health or social care or family support system can reduce the risk of death to zero?

Mine was over 30 years ago.

It was the single, most influential, life changing excruciatingly painful incident that I have ever ever felt or experienced.

The fall out, to this day is still deafening.
I have and never will recover from it.

No note. No indication. No diagnosed or treated mental health issues (that we knew about).
A happy, funny, witty, intelligent and quietly successful person. We all adored him. 26. A dad.

As out of the blue as you can get.

His mother died from heart break. We all have chronic heart break that knew and remember him.

Previously, I had no experience nor had I known anyone who had died by suicide. I do now, more & more.

@MillicentMaybe

Pop off yourself.

This!

The 'support' I recieved at an NHS 'mental health hospital' was frankly a disgrace and, if anything, made my situation worse - after one night I was sent home, where I then had a complete mental breakdown.

Fortunately for me, I have medical insurance, which I used to cover four weeks admission to a private hospital and a further fifth, which we paid for ourselves. It literally saved my life.

I dread to think what would have happened without it and I despair for those who aren't so lucky.

The government budget for mental health services is minuscule, almost non existent, that’s how much they care

I agree.

I ve had NHS CBT when I was younger. It was OK but 6 sessions nowhere near enough.

I found myself a fabulous therapist but I have to pay. I go for as long as necessary to work through my issues at that point. All my coping techniques have come from therapy.

When I was a child a neighbour, father to two small children, "got tangled up in a rope". It was not until over 40 years later that I learned it was suicide, it was always hushed up as others have said.

For those people who are saying it’s selfish, I’d guess in at least half of those cases the people have weighed up those people have thought long and hard about whether their loved ones would be better off without them. They absolutely wouldn’t have done this thinking ‘life is too hard for me, won’t impact anyone else’. In my situation, my kids would be financially set for life if I died in the next few months. I know my death would be hard on them but would it be worse than relieving all their financial worries for life? Ultimately I believe that they’d get over an ‘accidental’ death but not intentional. So it’s not a choice I’d make atm. But some days weighing up that choice is vv close. In many instances people who choose to die do it precisely because they think they are providing a benefit to loved ones