To say no! Twilight sessions (unpaid)

[LorlieS]

Can't sleep I'm so stressed!!
I'm working as a HLTA - paid hours 8.30 until 3.30.
Just picked up an email sent today telling me I need to attend two twilight sessions from after school until 6pm. Needless to say these will not be paid for and the first one is this week!
AIBU to say no?
Oh, and I also have a 3 yo and her childcare only runs until 4.30.

Usually in schools when they run twilight sessions staff then get a day of in lieu in the form of one less inset day. I’m a teacher and in my school if any staff really can’t work the twilights they have to work the extra inset day instead. It’s probably worth finding out more about the twilight sessions, I’d have thought it’s unlikely you’re expected to go without a day back. We do occasionally have unpaid training sessions offered as twilights but they’re always optional and not compulsory.

So, when were the insets/twilights booked in for? All the teaching staff will have needed to make a note of them as attendance is compulsory. Plus they have childcare to arrange.
I've no idea how an Asst Head i/c cpd could make that basic error?

What I do in my work if asked short notice is let them know it is too short notice to arrange childcare, I let them know that I have tried and ask them if they have any suggestions

Perhaps if your mum didn't do the morning bit could she do the afternoon? Then you could ask them if you can start later those 2 days as you don't have your mum in the morning?

It's certainly a very strange way to run a school, not giving inset details for the year ahead. However, as I said upthread, you'll need to speak to the Head, because it must be compulsory. Is it the Safeguarding one?

@HAF1119 I could ask but it's a school so they won't be flexible on hours.
I wouldn't mind so much if I was getting TOIL or overtime. Is that what happens in other jobs?

The problem is that even if it wasn't short notice you don't seem to have a contingency plan for things like this.

You won’t get paid extra as twilights are in lieu of a day off you will get at some point in the year instead of going in for an inset day.
But if they genuinely have only just been put in you’ll have to speak to the head, say you’ve got no childcare and ask if you can join on teams or make up the time at another point.

I am 74 , I do childcare 4 days a week for my grandchildren and work very part time on day 5 for a local university. I babysit a lot for both families. Ones the many great things is how many new friends I have made. Lots of grans at the school gate and mums/grans at play sessions. Having play dates with other mums and grans helps share the load. I worked full time as a teacher all my working life and had no parents / parents in law locally. There was little formal childcare available. I did a lot of reciprocal childcare as did my friends. I learned to offer to have friends children on Sundays so I could call in favours when needed.
It was different for parents years ago. We had to stand on our own two feet with regard to childcare. Every parent runs into problems with childcare and reciprocal arrangements are so crucial to coping with a career and children.

I appreciate it's pretty short notice but you're married and seem to have other family members too. That's a lot bigger support system than many have.

Not necessarily. When I was a TA I had an old contract so no requirement to attend INSETs. This was amended a few years later!

Some of the responses here are ridiculous - if the SLT genuinely just added it for next week that's not enough notice

I'd argue that the next one is also not enough notice if it's next week

Inform them via email that you cannot attend and request the calendar for the year.

They don't own your soul op. I'm a teacher, have been for 23 years - learn to say no to anything ridiculous. Work worries should not see you awake in the middle of the night!

I've already said this and so have others but it depends on your contract. You need to read your contract and see if it includes a specified number of training sessions.

I've also already said this, along with others, but you need to work on putting something in place for emergencies, whether that's finding a mum friend or neighbour who can babysit for cash or for a reciprocal arrangement.

There will be more times when you find you need someone to have your child.

Wake up on the morning of the twilight with a terrible migraine

@Willyoujustbequiet My only other family member is my 68 yo mum who will have had 3 yo from 7.40 that day so she's said no to extra hours. Which I totally understand! Hubby can't just take time at such short notice.

@Zonder Can't afford to pay for this sort of childcare, especially when not getting any toil or overtime!

As others have said, you will be paid for these. The twilights are in place of coming into school say on the 2nd January, which (to me) is inhumane

I have a friend whose school does twilights in exchange for an extra week in Oct half term. Worth it IMO.

This is what people are telling you though, check your contract. You probably are getting TOIL. You've probably had an inset day off paid already, and this twilight session is in exchange for you being paid for an inset day you didn't work.

Have you emailed the Head or Head's PA?

That's why I suggested looking to make a reciprocal agreement. You could swap a couple of hours this day for an evening when your husband is home.

But again, read your contract. If it is in there then you have agreed to do it.

Seems very simple to me. They didn't give sufficient notice so you can't attend due to previous commitments. This isn't an emergency it's normal training.

This scenario is why employees are being shafted, if more people got a grip and said 'no' to unpaid overtime, unreasonable requests (like this one) etc the employers would have to be more organised and employees would be happier.

Her DH should not have to step up here, the meeting is too short notice, end of. That said OP you need to ensure you are prepared when they are diarised. It sounds as though HLTAs are quite hard to recruit so what are they going to do? Sack you? No way as they have not given acceptable notice of a meeting.

How many INSET days are in the calendar OP?

In this instance it’s such short notice I’m sure you won’t be the only one who can't make it, but going forward there are going to be many times when you might be required to change plans suddenly, if your DM wasn’t well for example. Your DH needs some kind of flexibility too, it can’t ALL fall to you, your job is just as important!

Discuss with school and your DH, so that a future date can be organised, you shouldn’t be stressing so much about this.

Similar set up here OP... also a TA and there have been a few Twilights sprung on us at very short notice (due to a new Head who is dreadful, but that's another story)
There will always be some staff who simply can't make it due to childcare/other reasons. If you've had notice (your second twilight) then yes you really must find a way as undoubtedly it will be in your contract, but if the first one has literally just appeared on your calendar and you can't go... you can't go. Worst case you get hauled up for a meeting. While I don't reccommend this approach, I think it's highly unlikely you'll be fired... heaven knows schools can't recruit anyone at the moment!
When I ran into childcare difficulties (Dh was Forces so literally in another country and no relatives within 100 miles) I went Supply. Downsides, no sick pay, but actually made very little difference to my pay, and meant that if I said I couldn't work days, I let them know in advance.
I'm still working supply now as I'm caring for my 2 yr old grandchild. There was an inset yesterday.I didn't attend because I couldn't as had my dgs... I'll catch up on the info at a later date, or do it online at home if needed. Worth considering as it takes the stress out of working, knowing I can tell them when I am available and when I'm not!

So am I right in thinking there was NO training in the calendar and rather than staff saying 'er hang on' nobody mentioned the oversight?

I suspect this kind of thing will almost certainly be in your contract, so you will have to do it OP. The childcare issue isn’t your employers issue, it’s a case of you agreed to do X in your employment contract so it’s up to you to fulfil that, whether that means paying for childcare or some other means