Deleted after a few years. Am I a terrible person?

[MysticalMagical7]

I was with my ex for 5 years. We ended mutually and respectfully (just fizzled out) and I always think fondly for him. We split up in 2020.

We are not in contact but civil, still friends on social media. Until the other day when I saw him on suggested friends. He absolutely hated his ex (cheated on him) and he’s still friends with her.

I thought he always thought fondly of me too, and turns out he likely hates me which is why he deleted me.

I don’t know why I’ve taken this to heart but I really have? Why would he do this?

Are your FB posts generally as 'woe is me' as this thread is OP?

I had a good clear out of people on my friend list who were constantly like that. Far too attention seeky for me.

Complete overreaction

I expect he’s got a new girlfriend who has asked him to delete you. You’re more recent that the hated ex, and he probably still talks fondly about you, which makes you more of a threat . Hence you being deleted but the former ex not being deleted.

Well it could be anything.

He could be in love with you and be drawing boundaries to stop your posts coming up in his feed.

He might have a new girlfriend and feels more conformable deleting his exes that meant a lot to him at this point.

He might have had a social media clear out and deleted people he doesn't regularly speak to, guessing you're in this category if you only noticed when it showed up on suggested friends?

He hates you.

So many theories that seem to be blaming another woman 🙄

She didn’t ‘notice’ he came up
on suggested friends which showed her they were no longer friends

Has he created a new profile OP as it’s pretty rare for FB to suggest anyone you’ve already been friends with on there as ‘people you might know’

I have regular clear outs and never has anyone I’ve deleted shown up in my suggested friends.

He's moved on you need to as well.

He was abducted by aliens. OR he could have just moved on.

It's a really really strange leap to go to 'he hates me' from your op.
If that is where your mind goes to in these circumstances, I think you need to work on yourself somehow.

Yes, you’re a terrible person and he hates you, that’s definitely the most likely reason.
Or maybe it’s one of a hundred other possibilities!

Why do you care?

I had 400 facebook “friends” once. I know have 25.
Only people I actually want to keep in contact with.

Out of those 25, I only actually see 8 of them.

Maybe he had a massive clear out.

Who cares you've been over years. Get over it.

Even if he does feel any hostility to you it doesn't matter. He won't feature in your life going forwards.

If he’s on suggested friends it means it’s a new account.

Stop following him on SM and forget it all.

I do this. I don't hate the people or think they're terrible. I just have nothing to do with them anymore, and therefore, they don't need to be on my social media. Completely non-dramatic. You're overthinking massively.

I don't have my ex on social media and I wouldn't like my partner's ex to be on theirs either. It's got nothing to do with jealousy, hating anyone. For me it's just privacy.

I only have family and close friends on social media. I wouldn't be comfortable with exes commenting or seeing things we share on social media. If my OH used social media differently, ie had exes on there, I just wouldn't be "friends " online.

A similar thing happened to me, I was with someone when we was 17 for 2 years, we broke up & stayed friends on social media. I had a few boyfriend after and I'm now married, he never got into a relationship. We was friends on Instagram up until just after I got married. Not sure why, I didn't ask why. We haven't spoke for years and years so it doesn't really matter but I just noticed it one day!

It is normal for people to have a clearout and remove people they've not been in contact with for a few years, which is the case here.

You might be a terrible person for some other reason, but that doesn't hinge on being unfriended on social media by an ex you no longer talk to, that's not a brilliant yardstick OP.

Maybe he just can't bear to see how happy you are without him!

I do this all the time. It’s not that I’ve got any issue with the person but if I don’t interact with them then I really don’t need to know what’s going on in their life and vice versa.

Most of those I delete I’d have no problem being perfectly amicable if I bumped into them.

Facebook deletes people sometimes. My best friend was removed from my friends list and he thought I'd removed him, I hadn't. There's no explanation for it.

No one can know why he did it, though I very much doubt it’s down to hatred. You probably need to think about why you care though.

Why do you care? Are you still in love with him?