To cuddle my baby for all naps and not have a sleep schedule

[Cookiecrumblepie]

I have a 4 month old and am snuggling her for every nap. Co-sleeping and just letting her do her thing. She doesn’t have a set sleep schedule (just rough and whenever I can se me her getting tired) and I let her nap for as long as she likes on me. Her night sleep is fine, also snuggled near me. I feel this is against so much advice but I love it! AIBU?

You obviously enjoy it but I’d be bored rigid lying down for so long in the day. 😂

You can try doing things differently without devising some sort of very strict schedule.
Eg- cuddle them to sleep when they’re tired and then carefully get up.

I'm an adult and hate sleeping in the same room as someone else never mind sharing a bed. Happily married and husband also enjoys having a bed to himself. I was amazed by how many couples sleep separately when I spoke to my friends about it and lots more wished they had the space to sleep alone.

I did the same. At around 6 months, I used to feed him to sleep and then roll out of bed to have time for myself in the evenings. At around 15 months my DS started falling asleep on my DH's chest, so he took over bedtime from then and came into bed when he woke in the night. He consistently slept through at 2.

Contact naps aren't really possible with my DD half as much. I try to when I can.

You do what you think is best for your child and your family. What happens if you want to go out for the day or evening with friends?

Making a rod for your own back is nonsense.
Kids are all different with their own personalities and needs, and different birth experiences and bonding experiences.
You are doing what works for you and your baby and responding to their needs. Nothing like this directly and predictably causes anything else in the future, kids will be good sleepers or not later whatever you do and there's no way to know if changing something in the past would have given a different result.

I did all contact naps with first DC, it was lockdown so nothing else to do! Nearly 4 now and happily settles in own bed, only comes in for a cuddle if there's a loud noise outside or nightmare. Would dearly love to do all contact naps during the day with second baby, but alas, normal life is far busier than lockdown. Not unreasonable at all if it's working for you.

I mean, whatever works for you, but a lack of routine will make it impossible to plan anything or join toddler groups, swim classes etc

No it won't. DD is 2.5 and I have always let her nap for however long she needs whenever she needs. If she's asleep during a group we just don't go.

DD2 is 6 months and contact naps and I let her sleep whenever she needs too it's not caused any problems, she sleeps through the night in her own cot.

Do whatever works for you . We never had a nap schedule as I wasn’t indoors enough to bother , my babies both mainly slept when they were in the car driving from horse to horse to home .

Do what works, as long as you’re safe and happy, family and baby are safe and happy that’s really all that matters. I had lots of people give me “great” advice about sleep training 🤦‍♀️, weaning off the breast (when I didn’t want to), I always smiled and nodded politely then I just went off and did exactly what I wanted to do 😂

If she's asleep during a group we just don't go

Most baby groups round me aren't PAYG, you have to block book. So I had to be sure timings worked with naps.

And the whole rhetoric about not being to go anywhere, join any groups is nonsence! I’ve only ever witnessed the opposite of people on strict schedules, they often can’t leave the house as specific times because nap time is set between 11-1:30 etc. I always just popped babies in the car and brought my sling/buggy if they needed to nap they did just that. I was never restricted and babies were always happy!

Up to you (but you will face issues further down the line despite nobody on here who has done this in the past being brave enough to admit it).

Personally I think there’s a half way compromise to be met with little ones and their sleep, somewhere between putting them to bed and just leaving them (often upset) and the other extreme of cuddling to sleep until they are 10 etc).

@ItsNotOkItsNotTheEnd and @Goodnightto2023 I took the their vs they're to be from this sentence:

"My friend did your approach and was sleeping on the floor next to their cots then beds for the next 8 years."

Sleeping next to they are cots then beds for the next 8 years does not work. Please correct me if I picked out the wrong sentence but I believe this was the only one relevant.

I contact napped both of mine and they both now sleep independently. Do what works for you. Once they were on 1-2 naps a day I switched to using the pushchair but it didn't have to be outside. Neither of them ever napped in their cot but slept in it fine at night.

I had no routine and contact napped and actually had the opposite to what you’ve said. I wasn’t restricted by set nap times so could do any baby class I wanted regardless of time. I could do food shop etc whenever.

If you were fitting daily life around your baby’s naps and letting them sleep in the car or buggy when out or about then you’re nothing like the op.

Op Co sleeps- even during day time naps she sleeps too and always has baby napping on her.

Your way all sounds fairly standard. I’m not sure what you’re imagining a “sleep schedule” to look like. It’s just another way to describe some of routine isn’t it?

Most babies fall into a natural sleep pattern as they get past about 3 months anyway.

You do you. Personally I like routine, and with 3 kids now that approach wouldn't work for us. But as long as everyone is happy and healthy it really doesn't matter about other people's opinions. Enjoy :-)

Love love love contact napping and co sleeping. She’s perfectly able to fall asleep without me. This is just what works for all of us and as I work full time, I take any chance for extra cuddles with her.

Enjoy:)
I did this too, now he's 9 months old and I'm due back at work after school hols so trying to get him to sleep in his bed. There's nothing wrong with cuddling baby to sleep as long as you don't mind being stuck under a baby (for the most part I loved it)

YANBU, we don't have a sleep schedule and I feed to sleep for all naps and baby is happy and sleeps amazingly at night (cosleeping). Do what works for you!

At no point in the future will you look back and say "I wish I cuddled my baby less"

I say enjoy those snuggles 🥰

This is bollocks. When you're lying on you child's floor, hostage, at 9pm when your family/mates are drinking and eating downstairs, you may well regret,

Everyone who contact naps must just have the one child

No one looks back and wishes the cuddled their babies less. If baby is happy and safe, and you're happy it's all perfect!

That seems to be more of the norm now. Encouraging contact naps and baby led everything etc.

It isn't for me at all, love a good routine and have never encouraged contact napping. Have never co-slept either.

Whatever works for you.