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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to want my husband to wash the soap off the dishes?

118 replies

Mamasharp97 · 31/12/2023 10:34

As title says… he leaves the suds on and doesn’t rinse.
I think that’s disgusting and have asked him before after getting a mouthful of soap.
he's mad at me this morning because he did the washing up and I asked why they were soapy and not rinsed.

aibu?

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 31/12/2023 15:56

I only rinse if there’s visible soap on the item, never had a mouthful of soap.

LividStrike · 31/12/2023 15:58

Non-rinsers are fucking gross.

Drinking water glasses being especially vomitous.

Now I live alone again and have a dishwasher I can stack my own way, and thank fuck for that.

JingleSnowmanTree · 31/12/2023 15:59

Macaroni46 · 31/12/2023 15:29

I agree. Not rinsing is grim. But then I also find washing up bowls disgusting.

Show quote history

@Macaroni46

care to elaborate on why you think washing up bowls are disgusting?

@Mamasharp97

he'd be in the extension footings by now!

You NEED to wash off the residue under very hot water. The sudsy water only enables you to loosen the food particles, the hot rinsing removes them & the chemical residue.

@ others that don't rinse. You're leaving food & chemical residue on your dishes. It's not good for you.

HeddaGarbled · 31/12/2023 17:42

It's not good for you

It might be. Or it might be of neutral effect.

Thistooshallpsss · 31/12/2023 18:51

Domestic harmony means letting each partner take responsibility for and do their tasks as they see best

ithinkthatmaybeimdreaming · 31/12/2023 19:17

DisplayPurposesOnly · 31/12/2023 14:27

I dont rinse, have never tasted any suds on the dried dishes

Me neither, and I'm in my 60s. I don't believe I've ever seen anyone rinse dishes. If you are getting "a mouthful of soap" either he is using far, far, too much dishwashing liquid, or you are being ridiculous.

Also, if my partner said that to me I would be suggesting they take over dishwashing duties in future.

ithinkthatmaybeimdreaming · 31/12/2023 19:20

@ others that don't rinse. You're leaving food & chemical residue on your dishes. It's not good for you.

I can assure you that I do not have food residue on my dishes, and somehow I've got to the age of 64 in very good health, so the chemical residue doesn't appear to have damaged me, and my DPs and DGPs lived until their mid/late 80s with no obvious damage from not rinsing.

I do have to agree about washing up bowls however - they are not a thing where I live (thank goodness!)

VisitationRights · 31/12/2023 19:29

It is such a bizarre thing, why don’t people rinse? I don’t understand the reasoning.

Lovetotravel123 · 31/12/2023 19:38

I too believe it is carcinogenic and so definitely needs to be rinsed off. So YANBU.

Crishell · 31/12/2023 19:41

Isn't it funny how on MN, everyone is so over the top when it comes to cleaning and hygiene, yet every other thread is talking about all the horrible bugs going around.

I wonder...

DillyDallyingAllDay · 31/12/2023 19:58

So how are people washing things if they're not being rinsed? Are you using soap on a sponge to clean say, a plate, and then leaving it to drain on the side? surely it's not even wet enough to all the soap to slide off? Or drying them with a towel? Honestly this sounds like a truly British problem-I'm of those foreigners that just doesn't get it.

ArchetypalBusyMum · 31/12/2023 23:25

It is a British problem! For some reason lots of people in UK don't just rinse as a matter of course.
Go to other European countries, Asia, India you name it not rinsing is unusual.

LuciferRising · 31/12/2023 23:31

When I was an Au pair in the US at 18, they told me off for not rinsing. Said it was a British habit. It would make us all sick apparently. Always rinsed since as felt ashamed.

Skimm · 31/12/2023 23:37

I dislike the traditional 'English' method of washing dishes. When I wash up everything gets scrubs and rinsed with the tap running.

I notice it more when I visit placements with older English individuals, encountering the notorious washing up bowl, greasy and filled with remnants of old food at the bottom. It's rather unpleasant.

While I understand the need to soak first, I prefer a more refreshing 'shower' approach to washing up, as opposed to a 'bath'.

Everydayimhuffling · 31/12/2023 23:40

I don't bother to rinse mostly. No-one has ever mentioned a soapy taste and I've not noticed one ever.

I wash in very hot water, and there is soap in the water. Most things come out with minimal suds or none anyway. I wash and then dunk in the water, but I don't separately run fresh water to rinse.

The dishwasher is better for my life though, so now most things go in that.

OhNaffOffYouWazzock · 31/12/2023 23:49

Rinse. Dishwashers rinse, washing machines rinse, car washes rinse, we rinse our hair and bodies after washing. The process of cleaning dishes is no different and they need rinsing.

BusterGonad · 01/01/2024 00:26

I don't rinse, never have and I use a bowl. I rinse the food off first then do I final wash in the soapy bowl. I can't be bothered to then do another rinse. Life's too short and I don't see the point.

ithinkthatmaybeimdreaming · 01/01/2024 01:02

BusterGonad · 01/01/2024 00:26

I don't rinse, never have and I use a bowl. I rinse the food off first then do I final wash in the soapy bowl. I can't be bothered to then do another rinse. Life's too short and I don't see the point.

This. However, there are many MNers who seem to think we are living in the 50s and they have to prove their housewifely skills. Yawn .........

ArchetypalBusyMum · 01/01/2024 01:06

BusterGonad · 01/01/2024 00:26

I don't rinse, never have and I use a bowl. I rinse the food off first then do I final wash in the soapy bowl. I can't be bothered to then do another rinse. Life's too short and I don't see the point.

Well of course a rinse then a wash then a rinse is a total faff. So why not wash then rinse, same work cleaner result. 🥴

ArchetypalBusyMum · 01/01/2024 01:07

ithinkthatmaybeimdreaming · 01/01/2024 01:02

This. However, there are many MNers who seem to think we are living in the 50s and they have to prove their housewifely skills. Yawn .........

Show quote history

Meh , no one's proving anything except manky-ness with dishes maybe. 🤢

CointreauVersial · 01/01/2024 01:10

Yuk!
Not rinsing dishes is my pet peeve....or it was until we got a dishwasher.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 01/01/2024 01:55

Why don’t people rinse? Honestly I find it fascinating. I mean it’s not like it’s a lot of extra work? You’re already at the sink.

Is there a crossover between non-rinsers and people so don’t have garbages in their bathrooms?

Lieblingsessen · 01/01/2024 02:07

OhNaffOffYouWazzock · 31/12/2023 23:49

Rinse. Dishwashers rinse, washing machines rinse, car washes rinse, we rinse our hair and bodies after washing. The process of cleaning dishes is no different and they need rinsing.

👏👏

blackpanth · 01/01/2024 02:25

My partner does this and it annoys the hell out of me

Justosaythis · 01/01/2024 02:45

Agre with pp it’s a British problem. My parents are from another country and they found it bizarre some people don’t rinse here. So needless to say we all rinsed in our house. It’s literally just another few seconds why would people miss a vital step in the washing process? 😂 most people I know rinse but I did have a former best friend when I was younger who left huge amounts of washing up liquid foam on her dishes 🤢 I’d often offer to do her dishes after she cooked a meal when I was staying for a weekend 😂

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