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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that 6yo should not be playing on the street unsupervised?!

84 replies

raspberryjuiceandpompoms · 28/12/2023 13:46

I have this long standing argument with my family who feel that I’m a helicopter parent. Apparently I should let my 6yo DS go play outside on his own in streets of our village as he’s on technology a lot otherwise. Apparently my family members did it and they turned out fine. I always say that it’s a survivor’s mistake and that he will be allowed to go out to play when he’s older (more like 10). But apparently I’m hindering his development and infantilising him. Just had another argument and I’m furious. But thinking maybe I AM wrong? I do tend to be weary of people taking him (for play dates for example, only if I know the parents, no sleepovers yet etc.) He can make himself a sandwich or cereal unsupervised but apparently I worry too much about his safety and that is why he cannot even make himself an omelette (like even why?!?).

OP posts:

Zanatdy · 30/12/2023 10:14

I wouldn’t have dreamed of letting any of my 3 out of my sight at 6yrs old. Ignore

HoldMeCloserTonyDancer · 30/12/2023 10:25

We had a kid of 21 months playing out in the summer. I kid you not. Parent was kind of supervising but wtf

AndThatWasNY · 30/12/2023 23:10

existentialpain · 28/12/2023 14:15

As a 10-year-old growing up on a council estate loads of kids used to play around together unsupervised including 5 and 6 year olds. This was in the early 1990s. I think its too dangerous now sadly. There was so much more freedom when I was growing up.

What more danger is there?

Thementalloadisreal · 30/12/2023 23:15

Benibidibici · 28/12/2023 14:41

If your family want him to get off technology why don’t they actually just play with him rather than just turf him outside?!

Children shouldn't need to be constantly played with/entertained by grown ups. Maybe they think at his age he needs to learn to amuse himself some of the time by himself.

😂 who said “constantly”?!
There’s no reason why adults can’t / shouldn’t engage with children in their family!
Quality time spent with family members is much more beneficial than being left alone.
And much better than being chucked outside alone at age 6. 🤦🏻‍♀️

The whole “learn how to entertain yourself” stuff is just as outdated as “seen and not heard”. 😂 Why would you want to ignore the children in your family?!

Thementalloadisreal · 30/12/2023 23:16

OP, he’s 6. Trust your gut. Your family are being unreasonable and judgemental.

StarDolphins · 30/12/2023 23:20

I let my DD 7 (but allowed since 6) play out with her friend but I live on a cul de sac. Her friend lives across a small green & I also let her walk there/back. I feel like our area is safer than a lot, although nowhere is ever safe fully.

Stompythedinosaur · 30/12/2023 23:44

I think this is a decision that really depends on your area. My dc played out at 6, and it was absolutely normal in our village, but I imagine I might have done something different in a more risky area.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 30/12/2023 23:49

raspberryjuiceandpompoms · 28/12/2023 13:59

@Comedycook he’s allowed 2.5 hours of technology a day. I take him to play outside at least twice a day (he’s also got a baby sister, so he’s watching TV or playing switch when I’m putting her down for a nap for example). Problem is he’s rubbish at playing on his own and would winge and moan for ages to let him play longer. Very very occasionally he would pick up his action men or do some colouring. He does play with his sister and has play dates a few times a week.

Cut back on the tech it'll be killing his ability to play by himself.

Totally depends where you live as to wether it's safe or not to play out.

RedHelenB · 31/12/2023 00:06

chewsandwhine · 28/12/2023 14:11

Yes he should be allowed to play out.

You can’t wrap him in cotton wool

He’ll be missing out on fun with friends and won’t thank you when he’s older

This. As long as its safe traffic wise and near to your house. Mine played out from 7 +, walked to the shops by themselves. 10 seems a bit too old to have never played alone outside, mine were going further afield by then.

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