Is this a CF thing for SIL to do?

pinkfones · 2023-12-23T19:14:26+00:00

MIL was round today to drop presents over for the kids, we did a little buffet and had a drink etc. Then SIL turns up with presents (even though we are seeing them on the 27th anyway to exchange/open presents with their kids and ours etc anyway) "Oh is mum here we didn't realise!" So DH invites them in and they say yes. Turns out they DID KNOW MIL was here, and MIL and them had planned it so they could all spend time together at our house. Our house is small, and we didn't want a big event, especially seeing as we're seeing them anyway just after Xmas. AIBU?

TwentyThreeFifteen · 23/12/2023 19:18

Why is it just SIL who is CF if MIL also planned this?

WhatsInStoreFor2024 · 23/12/2023 19:19

Did you enjoy seeing them all? Hosting?

Fivepigeons · 23/12/2023 19:19

I don't let people in my home unless they've run by me that they are coming (unless it's an emergency obv)
I don't give a shit how they react to that.
So no I don't think yabu. I would not have invited her in.

Original poster

pinkfones · 23/12/2023 19:30

They both planned it, so yeah MIL was a CF as well as SIL.
But SIL actually turned up and lied to our face at the front door.
BIL gave it away saying the kids wanted to see MIL and then they both went red and totally gave it away.

It's not something I would do.

OP posts:

Raera · 23/12/2023 19:42

Open house here, I would have been pleased to have an impromptu party!

Rosiesmummy17 · 23/12/2023 19:48

Raera · 23/12/2023 19:42

Open house here, I would have been pleased to have an impromptu party!

Yesss me too!! :)

DillyDallyingAllDay · 23/12/2023 19:57

I'd be very angry about the lying. Like it's one thing that they've planned it, but why lie about it? She could have turned up and just as easily said, oh mum said she'd be here so we thought we'd pop round too, hope that's ok? Not like you'd say noooo please leave?!
Uggghh the lying is what gets me every time and it would make me question everything- what else has she lied about!!

Womencanlift · 23/12/2023 20:15

Seems like a good way to spend the Saturday before Christmas. You sound like you just want to get annoyed

If it was your mum and sister I wonder if it would be same response

Mumaway · 23/12/2023 20:17

Maybe a bit cheeky, but I just love impromptu guests, especially when it's family and I don't have to 'host'. Love a bit of a party

Dotjones · 23/12/2023 20:19

How did you find out they lied? I mean, I know they've turned up, but how did you find out it was pre-arranged? Sounds pretty stupid as well as cheeky fuckery. You know now for next year the golden rule of Christmas - don't answer the door.

Itllneeditshead · 23/12/2023 20:24

I’d have hated this. We don’t do surprises in my family though. We aren’t close so unannounced visits would be very much ‘what the fuck do you want?’ 🤣or we’d hide till they left. Thankfully we know better and nobody does it.

CharmedCult · 23/12/2023 20:25

This is the kind of thing my SIL would do (before DH stopped speaking to her).

PIL wouldn’t be in on it aswell, but if she ever found out they were coming over here she’d just turn up.

It was like she couldn’t stand them seeing us without her being involved.

freshgreen · 23/12/2023 20:39

Sounds fun to me.
Not sure why it matters.

missmollygreen · 23/12/2023 20:41

The bastards! family wanting to spend time together?!

YABU

Santaiswashinghissleigh · 23/12/2023 20:41

So no need to see them after Christmas now is there? Bloody smashing!!

Santaiswashinghissleigh · 23/12/2023 20:43

My ex sil would have done this. My dc were never 'allowed' to see her dps without her and her dc there also.

Greenshake · 23/12/2023 20:52

Bloody Hell, it’s Christmas! Isn’t this exactly the sort of thing what happens at this time of year? I barely have any family and would love for this to be a ‘problem’ that I had to deal with.

Tourmalines · 23/12/2023 20:59

Fivepigeons · 23/12/2023 19:19

I don't let people in my home unless they've run by me that they are coming (unless it's an emergency obv)
I don't give a shit how they react to that.
So no I don't think yabu. I would not have invited her in.

Jesus Christ !

Tourmalines · 23/12/2023 21:01

Dotjones · 23/12/2023 20:19

How did you find out they lied? I mean, I know they've turned up, but how did you find out it was pre-arranged? Sounds pretty stupid as well as cheeky fuckery. You know now for next year the golden rule of Christmas - don't answer the door.

She explains how on her posts .

Bloom15 · 23/12/2023 21:12

Fivepigeons · 23/12/2023 19:19

I don't let people in my home unless they've run by me that they are coming (unless it's an emergency obv)
I don't give a shit how they react to that.
So no I don't think yabu. I would not have invited her in.

Wow

Lunde · 23/12/2023 21:15

Well you can cancel the 27th as you have seen them and have a nice day to yourselves

Greenpolkadot · 23/12/2023 21:17

I don't understand they would cook this meeting up at your house
Why the big conflsb and subterfuge.

Motheranddaughtertotwo · 23/12/2023 21:17

We do that all the time with my family and friends! Jane comes round and tells me she mentioned to Lisa that she’s coming so Lisa might come too. Great, lovely. I have a small home but I’m still hospitable and enjoy company. Do you dislike your SIL?

Bakensmile · 23/12/2023 21:18

Fivepigeons · 23/12/2023 19:19

I don't let people in my home unless they've run by me that they are coming (unless it's an emergency obv)
I don't give a shit how they react to that.
So no I don't think yabu. I would not have invited her in.

Bizarre attitude

Kitkatcatflap · 23/12/2023 21:18

Santaiswashinghissleigh · 23/12/2023 20:41

So no need to see them after Christmas now is there? Bloody smashing!!

This. I would bin off the after Christmas meet now.