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AIBU?

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Original poster

Christmas ruined - what do I do?

390 replies

Mummytotwonow · 21/12/2023 21:58

My 8yr old has hunted and found all the Christmas presents wrapped up for her and her brother. I have spent bloody weeks getting the presents, organising fun things to do, school admin, whilst juggling FT work and all the other mental load women have to do. This has just fking topped it off. What’s the bloody point. Do I just tell her there’s no father Xmas and ruin Xmas for her and her brother or do I re-wrap everything? I feel like fking walking away. I’ve had enough :(

OP posts:
MummyJ36 · 21/12/2023 22:29

If she unwrapped them OP think it’s time for her to learn about Santa. It’s not unusual to look for gifts but to open them all is very hurtful and I think this unfortunately has to be the consequence.

AInightingale · 21/12/2023 22:30

If she hasn't unwrapped them, just buy a couple of massive rolls of cheap paper and wrap them again, and tell them the ones she found were for 'someone else' a charity or something. It happens, children are overexcited at this time of year.

Singleandproud · 21/12/2023 22:30

DD once had something giant delivered that couldn't be hidden,it coincided with the night that the Charity Lions Santa went passed so he delivered it early.

It's really a non issue, don't tell her that Santa isn't real even if she's 99% sure there's an awful lot of hope left in that 1% and telling her the truth with no gray area won't help bring the magic back.

larkstar · 21/12/2023 22:31

Exactly - as @Nothingbuttheglory suggested. But you could hide the presents in a number of tricky places and make up some clues - like a paperchase - that require them to work out where the presents are. e.g. you'll go round and round looking for them (in the washing machine drum), this is a rubbish present (in the bin) etc

Mostlyoblivious · 21/12/2023 22:31

You need a break OP.

re jig birthday and Christmas presents - re wrap some but perhaps scale back how many FC brings to minimise the wrap effort. If there is a DP then make it their job.

she was excited and it’s so natural to hunt presents-it wasn’t done with the intention of making your life harder - the fact she is excited about Christmas means you have done a fab job each year. Have a festive drink, kick the dp and have a lovely Christmas

MrsSucculent · 21/12/2023 22:32

Tell her Santa drops them off to parents throughout December because how else does he go round the whole world in one night really! Also at 8 she probably has suspicions he’s not real.

ChaToilLeam · 21/12/2023 22:32

Did she unwrap them? If so, then get her to rewrap. Tell her not to tell her brother.

If not, just stick them under the tree. She’ll still have the excitement of receiving everything on Christmas either way.

She is 8, it is unlikely that she completely swallows the whole Santa thing by now. And you are catastrophising, I get that you are stressed, but Christmas is by no means ruined.

NeighbourhoodWatchPotholeDivision · 21/12/2023 22:33

I've been on MN for years, since before your daughter was born and in that time, i have learnt many things.

One thing I've learnt is that pretending that all your gifts to your children are actually from Father Christmas is unsustainable, and creates unexpected issues the week after when children want to know why the magical being known as Father Christmas didn't bring them the unicorn they asked when they've been so good all year. Especially if Father Christmas did get Hugo Jones, class bully (and only child of two £100k earners), a £3k remote controlled drone, a £1k mountain bike and the latest console...

Father Christmas brings the things in the stocking here, and wrapped presents come from people in your life who love you.

Christmas is not ruined because your daughter saw some wrapped presents.

Fiftyvines · 21/12/2023 22:33

YABU. I'm sorry but Christmas isn't ruined because your kid found the xmas presents. Let's get a little bit of perspective here.

BusySittingDown · 21/12/2023 22:34

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Bloody hell, chill out!

People are allowed to feel upset by small things you know. I'd be quite annoyed if my children found their gifts that I'd lovingly picked out, wrapped and carefully hidden!

JANEY205 · 21/12/2023 22:34

So you are ruining Christmas then? What’s the big deal?!

Pumpkinspice13 · 21/12/2023 22:36

If you usually tell her that Santa brings all the gifts just re wrap a few up from Santa and keep the rest wrapped and say they are from you. Another option is some bows and Xmas stickers to put on the paper.

ImFloatingInAMostPeculiarWay · 21/12/2023 22:36

We always said that santa brought the presents here for us to wrap (why we had the same paper)

VanityDiesHard · 21/12/2023 22:38

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While I agree that the OP is making too big a deal out of this, the 'genocide' is completely irrelevant and actually it is a bit distasteful of you to use those poor people as a stick to beat the OP with. Using victims of heinous things as guilt trips is not the flex you seem to think it is.

HelloDaisy · 21/12/2023 22:38

Fairydustandsparklylights · 21/12/2023 22:03

Where did you leave them that she found them? Did she unwrap them? I would re wrap, return a few and replace with different ones so they still have Santa presents.

Great plan!

Kittylala · 21/12/2023 22:39

Chill! She's found your presents, not Santa's!

Roastiesarethebestbit · 21/12/2023 22:40

Christmas is not ruined! Trust me, your daughter is more concerned that she gets the presents on her list, than whether it is you or Santa getting them! My kids - aged about 8- get all their presents from Santa, and yet still they know that they aren’t allowed to look under my bed because there are presents for them there, and they see the Amazon parcels arriving all the time! But they are too caught up in the excitement of Christmas to want to question any of it too deeply! Actually my younger one did ask this year if her dad and I get her anything, or if it’s all from Santa, and I said ‘of course we do but I just put all the presents together in one pile’ and she was fine with that. All you have to do is make up some little story that gives her permission to still believe. And don’t dwell on it too much. If she questions it and doesn’t believe you, then she’s ready to not believe in Santa any more, and that doesn’t have to be a big deal. Are any of us adults traumatised by childhood memories of finding out he wasn’t real? Did Christmas cease to have any point once we no
longer believed?

Bluebellsbells · 21/12/2023 22:40

I tell mine most of their presents I buy wrap and send to the North Pole. Santa then decides if you are on the hood list or not and delivers them. Just say yours are on their way to the North Pole on Saturday

Katbum · 21/12/2023 22:41

I would have been in so much trouble for this, and if it were my own DC, they would be getting majorly punished for this. At the very least several presents taken away and additional chores! Really bratty behaviour. Horrid.

Christmassss · 21/12/2023 22:42

I wouldn’t say anything, Christmas isn’t ruined if she doesn’t believe in Santa.

IDontLoveTheWayYouLie · 21/12/2023 22:43

Katbum · 21/12/2023 22:41

I would have been in so much trouble for this, and if it were my own DC, they would be getting majorly punished for this. At the very least several presents taken away and additional chores! Really bratty behaviour. Horrid.

You're joking aren't you? 😅

stayathomer · 21/12/2023 22:44

Op when you say hunted and found is that just that she found them? My son at 8 didn’t believe (we told him age 10 but had been fending off questions for years), but in general an 8 year old is all about the magic! You said you feel hurt, she’s only 8, she wasn’t out to cause trouble

PrestonHood121 · 21/12/2023 22:44

I doubt at 8 years old she still all in for believing in Santa.

HungryandIknowit · 21/12/2023 22:46

I don't understand this. Santa just gets stocking presents (mostly satsumas) no?

DaughterNo2 · 21/12/2023 22:46

I was always told Father Xmas brings ur stocking 🤷‍♀️