To ask about your good men?

[Imonanotherdiet]

I know this will sound a bit 'men are trash'. Of course there are many good ones, I'm just losing faith.
I'd love to meet some that aren't primarily thinking about getting laid, that aren't scared of commitment and being 'tied down', that don't leave their dirty underpants all over the floor.
Ones who don't have those too close for comfort 'friends' that they clearly fancy, who are honest, kind, and contribute fairly.
I'm not bothered about a 6-pack, 6ft3 and 6 figure salary at all, just someone with the above who's decent and wants commitment.
Would be great to hear your positive stories!

My husband is definitely one of the good ones. He's 36. He works full time but does his fair share both with the kids and the housework. I'm 3 stone heavier than when we met and I hate how I look now, but he tells me I'm beautiful every day. He does the washing up every evening so that I can shower in peace (alternative would be a lightning speed morning shower with my kids as an audience). He puts up with the insane PMS I now naturally have since giving up hormonal contraception and has had a vasectomy so that I don't have to suffer the hideous headaches I had on the pill. He's amazing and I'm lucky to have him.

On the flip side, he leaves his dirty laundry on the floor the whole bloody time and is the king of procrastination when it comes to life admin, so no-one is perfect!

I met my wonderful man online. He is kind, wise, energetic and loving. A fantastic dad and husband. On top of that he's such an extrovert and makes friends with people instantly. Everyone always tells me how lucky I am which I agree with. Everyone loves him but he loves me the most 😊

Met my DP at work 20 years ago. He’s not conventionally handsome, certainly doesn’t have a six-pack, and somehow always looks a bit scruffy regardless of what he’s wearing. He’s also very shy. He is, however, the LOVELIEST man. He is very kind, incredibly funny, gentle and affectionate and he’s extremely clever. He also does all the household admin, books and plans all our holidays, does all the laundry and all the driving. I adore him and I know he adores me too.

Would he be right for everyone? No. He’s not at all ambitious, devotes a ton of time and effort to his hobby, drinks more than the recommended units per week, is utterly inept at DIY and gardening, fairly bad at shopping etc. But he’s absolutely right for me, and we share loads of nerdy fascinations for things that I don’t think anyone else would really understand.

I have one. Met when we were 18. Catch 'em young and train em up

Mine is a good man. When we met 25 years ago, i just knew he was the one. He is also good looking and exciting. It's possible to be a good man and also attires and fun. More than that though he's kind, caring, emotionally strong and supportive will do anything for me, and is a fantastic dad. He has so many good qualities. We have supported each other through good times and bad over the years which has made us so strong. He is currently supporting and guiding me through a very difficult time while caring for me and taking care of the home, cooking , our son. I feel very, very fortune.
My dad was a good man. As was fil and my brother.
Problem is Op that the good men are mostly taken but I'm sure there must be some out tgere.

I have a good man, he has his flaws (who doesn't) but works hard, does more than his share domestically, prioritises me and the kids, would probably like to have more sex but never pushes anything. We approach everything like a team I think. I mean he can be a bit set in his ways, while I'm sometimes a bit hasty so we do raise eyebrows at each other a bit, but generally I think we balance each other out 💖 didn't meet him until I was 34/5 though and the exes are all awful. I just got lucky

I have one.

He's quirky (ADHD), can be insanely stubborn and certainly wouldn't be everyone's cup of tea but his heart is always in the right place, he'd give anyone the shirt off his back if they were in trouble. He works hard, does as much as he can around the house, and does his best to look after us all.

His brain works way too fast for what he wants to say, and that often makes him talk really quickly - not everyone can understand him. But I always can 🥰

Plus I think he's gorgeous which obviously helps. Dark hair, dark eyes, stocky and strong enough to pick me up despite 20kg of weight gain since we met 🤦‍♀️ and I could listen to his voice all day (damn I adore Eastern European accents)

I have a pretty good one, he does all the cooking, half the cleaning, most of the running around and generally makes sure we’re all ok. Clueless on admin, never does laundry, messier than me… but it all balances out. Some days I could cheerfully wrap a pan round his head, but honestly I’d be completely screwed without him. My family and friends love him too, we’re a good match.

Mine is like this. Committed from day 1. Not a single day I’ve ever been suspicious of him. Equal partner, kind, generous.

He’s also gorgeous to me and 6ft but no 6pack now, not that I give two hoots about that.

I also have one. Together 11 years, married 2. He is funny, gorgeous, charismatic, interested in people, loves to learn, cooks every day (and cleans after), looks after me every time I get very stressed / anxious, loves his family, siblings and niblings, loves my parents, loves his friends, never loses his temper, looks after himself, kind and millions of other things! He is definitely the better person between the two of us.

Hmm what can I say about my husband . He is my carer , hasn't always been like this , this situation is recent since I was diagnosed .
He cooks all my meals , takes the dog out , does the housework and never leaves his undies on the floor .
We have been together a long time but y'know 'til death do you part .
He makes me laugh , the sex was great don't do it so much now but great memories .We have had a fun life so far 😁..

Mines a good'un.

Fab dad - hands on
Intelligent with a good well paid job he works hard at
Doesn't leave all the work at home/life admin to me
Has good sense of humour.
Is slim & healthy
Nice face, good teeth
Kind/generous.
We have lots of shared interests
Never been a gambler/drinker

A lot of women would probably write him off as a bit nerdy, he has a good job but its not "cool". He also had a pretty badly receding hairline already when i got with him - mid 20s, so i suspect wouldn't have ticked some people's boxes as "conventionally sexy". He's not a smooth talker/charmer (this is a good thing imho).

If it weren't for the part about the hairline I'd think that you were DH's secret wife. My good un has all these qualities too. Just substitute sometimes questionable taste in clothes for hairline when I met him. 😀

From many of the comments above, we appear to be talking frequently about the 'friendzoned' guys... those that are fairly plain, outwardly average and uncharismatic, but are personable, reliable and 'solid'

I met DH when we were both 18. He was handsome, alright, but the best thing about him was that talking to him was like coming home. I'm an absolute fruitcake - erratic, intemperate, depressive - and my life has been through a fair few ups and downs as a result, but he's always been there, not always as an uncritical champion but always on my side. He's a lovely dad to our little son and generally a great person to have around.
Here's the thing, OP - yes, he's great, but if I think about my male friends and the school-run dads, I can honestly say I know lots of men who are kind, respectful, loving towards their partners and children, and, you know, good to talk to. So - yes, I've been incredibly lucky, but if there's one piece of advice I'd give you, it's: surround yourself with lovely people, 'cos they're definitely out there! Xx

I have one of these and a few in my family (biological and in laws), interestingly, and unusually, all met and married young, met in teens, married in early 20s. Relationships coming up to 20 years long now. For DH and I, we grew up together, have built everything we have together, no exes, I think the simplicity of our relationship in that regard helps enormously. We are friends first, we've made mistakes along the way (nothing big like cheating I hasten to add!) but the key thing is we have learned and prioritise each other. Young relationships are a gamble, you can grow apart, but when you manage to grow together, it's very, very special.

And no he's not perfect, nor am I, but our faults are entirely compromiseable!

I'm v lucky to have met one. He cleans, he is v emotionally steady and hes a proper parent he focuses on family time isnt a big drinker. He is also 6ft1!

DH is now a good man. He isn't perfect, he has done things some MNers would insist should result in LTB but he has always been a loving, hands on dad, he has always been attentive and romantic, buys flowers, still fancies me after 30 years despite me being two stone heavier than when we met. He's funny, reliable, kind, patient, thoughtful.

I have a good man, he gave up his career when I was severely ill to look after the kids with no hesitation.

My advice would be, don't look for it... everyone I know who looks for a relationship always end up in terrible one's. I never wanted to settle down but honestly came from nowhere- I think they best ones just appear when you least expect it.

My partner is a good egg, honest, reliable, family man who does all the Christmas shopping and wrapping even though he works more hours than me, But he still leaves dirty washing on the bathroom floor, snores loudly, has an expensive hobby and a terrible singing voice 😂 all im saying op theres good men out there but they all have bad point, just need to find the one with the bad habits you can tolerate.

I have a good one. He isn’t perfect at all - he’s very messy and disorganised. He’s a real geek and a massive introvert. But he’s really kind, loyal, good-natured, clever and endlessly patient.

I have one. Like many mention above, people probably think him boring as he's quiet and serious. Steady and dependable. After a very crappy couple of years for us both lately he's proved even more to be a treasure. I don't feel worthy enough for him, I'm well aware of my luck

I have one. He wanted to be a dad so he is one. Takes him out alone, does nights, cleans up.

He lived alone after uni so he was already able to organise his own accommodation, cook, clean and pay bills. Financially responsible, hardworking, doesn't drink, can drive too which is handy!

He was the quiet, straight A student type who was overlooked until he grew up. Hes lovely. So welcoming of my friends, not bitchy.

He taught me what it was like to jmhave a good man and I'll never ever settle for less. He has set a high bar for our simon to learn from.

Mine’s a good one. Kind, warm, generous, supportive, loyal, interesting and funny. I spent years being messed about by bad boys and fortunately came to my senses 25 years ago He does all the cooking, food shopping and meal planning which is nice but it’s the cherry on the cake.