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Original poster

Once in a lifetime trip - 3 weeks off school

935 replies

XMissPlacedX · 14/12/2023 20:27

My daughter has always wanted to go to Disney world Florida, but due to funds I've not been able to afford it. She is 14.

Her aunty who is quite well off and has a daughter the same age (my dd's cousin ) goes to Disney world Florida every 2 years and has offered to take my dd next year for 3 weeks.

The problem is it's the first 3 weeks of the school term ( September 2024). I've asked her if there was anyway of going in the summer holidays and she said it would double their cost and it would be cheaper for them to pay the school fine .

What do I do ? Do I say yes or no ? I would love for my dd to go but am not sure how much the fine would be and what impact missing that amount of school would cause.

I'm really torn

OP posts:
catherinewales · 17/12/2023 13:29

Year 10 id let her go on the understanding that she does all her work and homework and scarifies some time for her studies before she goes and when she gets back. Year 11 I wouldn't. That's to important. I have seen your letting her go for 10 days will she be able to travel alone coming back if they are going for 3 weeks. That's a lot of traveling for such a short time. Anyway hope she has the best time xx

LaurieStrode · 17/12/2023 13:32

theDudesmummy · 17/12/2023 13:01

It's not just the lost time, it's the message. It's OK to skip weeks of something important and serious because you want to go to a theme park. So later on she may well think, you know what, I won't bother to go to the lectures, I feel like partying and sleeping for the next three weeks instead, I am young and having fun so that's also important. I'll catch up somehow like I did before...

Yes, it's the mentality that is concerning.

Ability to delay gratification is key to successfully navigating education, the workplace, lifestyle choices.

OkCupcake · 17/12/2023 13:33

This is all down to you. Does your daughter know about the trip? Is your daughter OK with missing the beginning of the school year? Does she need qualifications in specific subjects for her job aspirations? Is she academically capable of catching up? If not, would she be OK catching up on her GCSE's in college (if she needs them)

My children missed months of school when we moved house and couldn't get a placement, yet all of them are in the top sets. If you feel your daughter is capable of catching up, then go for it.

No one knows your child better than you do. Don't let anyone make the decision for you.

TizerorFizz · 17/12/2023 14:14

@OkCupcake Yes. She knows. It was stated way back! Deliberately missing school isn’t the same as bright dc having no place at a school. Although I bet you were offered one.

Livelifelaughter · 17/12/2023 15:05

So I feel the title of this post is sadly misleading... Really "DD has been offered a free trip to Disneyland and will require 3 weeks off school, shall I allow her to go ? " When I first read the title I honestly thought it was a trip to a remote part of the world to sample a different culture, learn something etc and that would spark more of a debate...

Blades2 · 17/12/2023 15:43

Firm believer here that the GCSEs are not the be all and end all.

id let mine go on the holiday

Mornusting · 17/12/2023 16:08

Yet they are necessary at a good level in many places to secure a place in Sixth Form.

RampantIvy · 17/12/2023 16:18

Blades2 · 17/12/2023 15:43

Firm believer here that the GCSEs are not the be all and end all.

id let mine go on the holiday

Firm believer here that lack of GCSEs massively limits opportunities for further education and higher education.

TheaBrandt · 17/12/2023 16:39

Saying they are not the “be all and end all” is what you say to a sad teen who is disappointed in their results to cheer them up. Saying it generally before they’ve even done the exams is pretty defeatist and not great parenting either. Surely you want to encourage your children to do as well as they can to fulfil their potential?

Straightupmom · 17/12/2023 18:42

Let her go..!! I can’t believe some of the replies on this thread, absolute fun sponges 🙄

First of all; You don’t “co-parent” with the school, YOU are her mother. YOU decide! Let them know, but don’t ask their permission.

Secondly; DON’T pay their fine. These school fines are unlawful, and if you get to know your rights, you won’t need to pay a penny.

Hope she gets to go and has an amazing time 🙌🏼

StarlightLime · 17/12/2023 18:47

Get to know your rights
🙄

TheaBrandt · 17/12/2023 18:51

Fun sponge 🙄🙄 you are like the mum in mean girls “I’m a COOL mom I have no rules I’m not like other mums” good luck with that.

TheaBrandt · 17/12/2023 19:21

Oh and if you don’t pay court fines.. you get to go to prison! Such fun!

ThanksItHasPockets · 17/12/2023 19:22

Absolutely fascinated to learn the grounds on which attendance fines are unlawful @Straightupmom.

Mikimoto · 17/12/2023 19:24

Blades2 · 17/12/2023 15:43

Firm believer here that the GCSEs are not the be all and end all.

id let mine go on the holiday

....says the failed applicant to Scunthorpe Poly...

GabriellaFaith · 17/12/2023 20:46

Gosh someone's miserable 😂 The daughter is 14, so not a GCSE or anything else major year, plenty of time to catch up on a few weeks. The mum also said she couldn't ever afford anything like this and it's a once in a lifetime trip, I would assume from this that her daughter would also gain a lot from the whole experience as its not common. Going on an aeroplane for example, experiencing a different culture, it will all be part of it.

Our experience of Disney (taking the girls out of school for) was absolutely brilliant. They tried so many new foods, went on a helicopter flight, fed alligators, learnt loads at EPCOT, experienced loads of shows, swam unaided for the first time, one got over her fear of heights pushing herself to go on the rides, we did the typhoon lagoon glow party on their birthdays which they will never forget, we watched better fireworks displays than any in England, marvelled at how they speak English yet have so many different words to us (they counted over 100) and delighted in the magic of meeting princesses, a joy that they sadly will soon outgrow. Too much of our lives is spent sat down working. This is a one off for a few weeks. She can take any reading with her to do on the plane and then catch up with honework afterwards. It's not as dramatic as you make out. Goodness looking back now I wish I had never worried about my own exams so much and I had got to experience what they have!

Cantbeardarknights · 17/12/2023 20:53

GabriellaFaith · 17/12/2023 20:46

Gosh someone's miserable 😂 The daughter is 14, so not a GCSE or anything else major year, plenty of time to catch up on a few weeks. The mum also said she couldn't ever afford anything like this and it's a once in a lifetime trip, I would assume from this that her daughter would also gain a lot from the whole experience as its not common. Going on an aeroplane for example, experiencing a different culture, it will all be part of it.

Our experience of Disney (taking the girls out of school for) was absolutely brilliant. They tried so many new foods, went on a helicopter flight, fed alligators, learnt loads at EPCOT, experienced loads of shows, swam unaided for the first time, one got over her fear of heights pushing herself to go on the rides, we did the typhoon lagoon glow party on their birthdays which they will never forget, we watched better fireworks displays than any in England, marvelled at how they speak English yet have so many different words to us (they counted over 100) and delighted in the magic of meeting princesses, a joy that they sadly will soon outgrow. Too much of our lives is spent sat down working. This is a one off for a few weeks. She can take any reading with her to do on the plane and then catch up with honework afterwards. It's not as dramatic as you make out. Goodness looking back now I wish I had never worried about my own exams so much and I had got to experience what they have!

Not one part of me could even begin to think that a trip to Disney could in any way count as a necessary or cultural experience.

TheaBrandt · 17/12/2023 20:59

It’s all so synthetic and man made. We’ve only been to the euro one and the Californian one. My now teens rarely mention either trip neither make the top three of our family holidays together.

TheaBrandt · 17/12/2023 21:09

Also you say your kids are of the age to enjoy meeting princesses? So little. We are taking about missing chunks of your gcse course not flipping primary school. Veeerrry different.

notmorezoom · 17/12/2023 21:20

GabriellaFaith · 17/12/2023 20:46

Gosh someone's miserable 😂 The daughter is 14, so not a GCSE or anything else major year, plenty of time to catch up on a few weeks. The mum also said she couldn't ever afford anything like this and it's a once in a lifetime trip, I would assume from this that her daughter would also gain a lot from the whole experience as its not common. Going on an aeroplane for example, experiencing a different culture, it will all be part of it.

Our experience of Disney (taking the girls out of school for) was absolutely brilliant. They tried so many new foods, went on a helicopter flight, fed alligators, learnt loads at EPCOT, experienced loads of shows, swam unaided for the first time, one got over her fear of heights pushing herself to go on the rides, we did the typhoon lagoon glow party on their birthdays which they will never forget, we watched better fireworks displays than any in England, marvelled at how they speak English yet have so many different words to us (they counted over 100) and delighted in the magic of meeting princesses, a joy that they sadly will soon outgrow. Too much of our lives is spent sat down working. This is a one off for a few weeks. She can take any reading with her to do on the plane and then catch up with honework afterwards. It's not as dramatic as you make out. Goodness looking back now I wish I had never worried about my own exams so much and I had got to experience what they have!

swam for the first time and loved meeting princesses - primary age presumably? When missing school still isn't great, but totally different to in the GCSE year.

Teledeluxe · 17/12/2023 22:58

If she goes she may also get to meet young adults working in cartoon animal costumes, who are probably on minimum wage because they didn’t take school seriously.

Iwantmyoldnameback · 17/12/2023 23:02

GabriellaFaith · 17/12/2023 20:46

Gosh someone's miserable 😂 The daughter is 14, so not a GCSE or anything else major year, plenty of time to catch up on a few weeks. The mum also said she couldn't ever afford anything like this and it's a once in a lifetime trip, I would assume from this that her daughter would also gain a lot from the whole experience as its not common. Going on an aeroplane for example, experiencing a different culture, it will all be part of it.

Our experience of Disney (taking the girls out of school for) was absolutely brilliant. They tried so many new foods, went on a helicopter flight, fed alligators, learnt loads at EPCOT, experienced loads of shows, swam unaided for the first time, one got over her fear of heights pushing herself to go on the rides, we did the typhoon lagoon glow party on their birthdays which they will never forget, we watched better fireworks displays than any in England, marvelled at how they speak English yet have so many different words to us (they counted over 100) and delighted in the magic of meeting princesses, a joy that they sadly will soon outgrow. Too much of our lives is spent sat down working. This is a one off for a few weeks. She can take any reading with her to do on the plane and then catch up with honework afterwards. It's not as dramatic as you make out. Goodness looking back now I wish I had never worried about my own exams so much and I had got to experience what they have!

What on earth do you normally eat that your children got to try so many new foods? I can only think of those awful greasy turkey legs that are different to anything we eat over here.
And she's 14 now so 15 next year when the trip is planned.

Dixiechickonhols · 17/12/2023 23:06

Iwantmyoldnameback · 17/12/2023 23:02

What on earth do you normally eat that your children got to try so many new foods? I can only think of those awful greasy turkey legs that are different to anything we eat over here.
And she's 14 now so 15 next year when the trip is planned.

Show quote history

https://www.disneyfoodblog.com/2023-epcot-food-and-wine-festival-booths-menus-and-food-photos/
I assume poster means food and wine festival at Epcot it will be on in September.

2023 EPCOT Food and Wine Festival Booths, Menus, and FOOD PHOTOS | the disney food blog

The EPCOT Food & Wine Festival is an annual celebration of global cuisine in Disney World! The dates for the 2023 EPCOT Food and Wine Festival were July 27 through November 18, 2023. Stay tuned fo

https://www.disneyfoodblog.com/2023-epcot-food-and-wine-festival-booths-menus-and-food-photos/

GabriellaFaith · 18/12/2023 01:48

Still not GCSE year 😉

Yes it's just junk food if you walk around and pick food up. But EPCOT do foods from all around the world, and there are amazing dining experiences if you book things like the space centre (cant remember its name, but it's the only space restaurant!) the aquarium dining wasn't new food, but the quality was amazing, and certainly I haven't seen shellfish that big in England. Brilliant sat right next to all the sharks etc, similar to dining in the castles - the beasts castle has such beautiful attention to detail. The girls, for example, each had a cup moulded to look like the character chip. It came with edible paint for them to decorate it. There are so many good fun dining experiences at Magic Kingdom and Animal Kingdom from the rainforest cafe to storybook dining (my fav) and then the culinary experiences at Epcot, especially if there is a festival on. If you follow the space centre you've got a good chance of seeing a rocket whilst there too which we did one night as we were up late to watch the fireworks (they seems to launch really early or late, or maybe just happened that way during our trip!)