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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask any teachers what end of term presents they really want

246 replies

Applebyapples · 13/12/2023 16:17

I always dread buying end of term presents for my children's teachers...not because I begrudge the money, but because I don't know what to get and imagine they always end up with a load of knick-knacks and chocolate they don't really want, or wine when they don't drink. So to save me from the angst this year, if you're a teacher, what end of term presents would you choose for a budget of around £10?

OP posts:
Sparehair · 14/12/2023 11:03

Danana · 14/12/2023 10:35

I agree, but normally you have to declare gifts of higher value than about £25 and monetary gifts are often not allowed under financial policies. It was just surprising is all, but every school will have a policy about this so I guess that will all have been taken into account.

Yeah - I’m not sure but I’m guessing there is a limit and it’s a tenner per child because I’ve never seen any class rep do any other amount. I seem to remember something about “ gifts should be proportionate and not excessive” in the parents handbook - so I’m guessing it shouldn’t look like a bribe to write your little darling a good secondary school reference even when they are the spawn of Satan 🤣

BackAgain2023 · 14/12/2023 11:03

Wtf! Why would anyone do this!?

Skiggles2018 · 14/12/2023 14:17

As a teacher, I never understand all the teachers on this thread who apparently get rid of all their gifts or give to charity!
I am always so, so grateful for any gifts I get and they’re usually so thoughtful from candles, decorations, pens, notebooks, gin, wine, chocolates.
who doesn’t use all of those things!?
I don’t know any teachers who don’t use their gifts.
The one exception is red wine but I either give it to my dad or use it in cooking so it’s still a good gift.

MrsAvocet · 14/12/2023 14:29

I was just talking to my DD about this earlier. She says she can usually guarantee she never needs to buy any shower or bath products all year thanks to her pupils so very much appreciates such gifts. Last year she didnt get any though - it was like someone had sent a message out saying it was against the law to give bubble bath! She could however have bathed regularly in Prosecco as she was given many bottles, most of which were regifted as she doesn't really like it, though she did appreciate the gesture of course.

Sarvanga38 · 14/12/2023 14:42

nutsnutspistachionuts · 14/12/2023 10:09

One of the mums in my son's reception class started a collection for christmas presents. Everyone chipped in. That's nice, I thought, the teacher will get a hefty John Lewis voucher or something. Hoooo boy. This mum took it upon herself to make individual gift bags from each child, that were identical. And there were two teachers. So both teachers each got 30 silver gift bags, 30 miniature bottles of prosecco, 30 bath bombs, 30 best teacher ever mugs, 30 chocolate santas, 30 tiny succulents.

We only found out when she put a message on the Whatsapp group asking if anyone could help her carry the presents from her car.

This cannot be true. Noone on earth could be THAT stupid.

Goodlard · 14/12/2023 14:49

Bouncyball23 · 14/12/2023 07:37

Maybe a nice scarf and glove set perfect for cold break time duties, that's what I've bought aswell as some chocolates.

That's way too personal a gift....

Alwaystiredmum123 · 14/12/2023 14:51

Teachers are truly grateful for anything :) although one of my colleagues was once gifted a half eaten pack of mints 🤣
the last few years my class has done a collection and go is John Lewis vouchers which is so amazing and generous. We do this for my daughters teachers as well.

SnowsFalling · 14/12/2023 15:00

Support staff here.
I'd really like it if your kids turned up with a pen, pencil, ruler and calculator every day. That would really make my life easier.

PurpleStar22 · 14/12/2023 15:02

When DS was in primary we did a class collection. £10 per child. It wasn’t compulsory so anyone could join anytime they wanted or do something else. We did half for the teacher and half for the TA. Usually £20 each goes to a local charity and I made a certificate for it, and gift vouchers and a nice card then too.

Baba197 · 14/12/2023 15:53

We give ours an all in one gift card from the post office, lots of choice of places to use it, the class clubs together and then the teachers get a decent amount. Much better than loads of tat!

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 14/12/2023 16:00

I'm surprised at the amount of people giving their children alcohol to give their teachers!!

I don't think it's appropriate at all. I give a small gift but would never dream of sending alcohol into the school. If its a gift from the child to the teacher then surely it shouldn't be something the child can't even legally buy.

Why? The child isn't buying it. The teacher is allowed to drink it. Nothing remotely illegal is occurring.

purplesky18 · 14/12/2023 16:33

My daughter made her teacher a string bracelet with her name on, she seemed really chuffed with that! I also just got a box of quality street so she can keep or share them out. Small things are perfectly enough don’t over think it !

Goodlard · 14/12/2023 16:43

ineedanewbum · 14/12/2023 09:10

I'm surprised at the amount of people giving their children alcohol to give their teachers!!
I don't think it's appropriate at all. I give a small gift but would never dream of sending alcohol into the school. If its a gift from the child to the teacher then surely it shouldn't be something the child can't even legally buy.

Oh don't be so bloody ridiculous!!

CasperGutman · 14/12/2023 16:48

My child's teacher is getting a voucher for a local bike shop. All the parents were invited to contribute. This was organised via a WhatsApp message which requested donations via PayPal and made clear that (i) donations would be treated anonymously, (ii) the card will be signed from all parents, no matter how many contribute, (iii) nobody should donate more than £5-10 as an absolute maximum. The amount collected is about £250. The teacher is a keen cyclist, so we're confident the voucher will be well received.

CasperGutman · 14/12/2023 16:50

Goodlard · 14/12/2023 16:43

Oh don't be so bloody ridiculous!!

Show quote history

A teacher friend reports being given a half bottle of whisky, badly wrapped, from a pupil who handed it over while saying "Just don't ask how I got it, Miss".

Parker231 · 14/12/2023 17:13

Skiggles2018 · 14/12/2023 14:17

As a teacher, I never understand all the teachers on this thread who apparently get rid of all their gifts or give to charity!
I am always so, so grateful for any gifts I get and they’re usually so thoughtful from candles, decorations, pens, notebooks, gin, wine, chocolates.
who doesn’t use all of those things!?
I don’t know any teachers who don’t use their gifts.
The one exception is red wine but I either give it to my dad or use it in cooking so it’s still a good gift.

My teacher friend regularly gets the items you have listed but not brands she likes so she donates them to a food bank or charity shop but always keeps the handmade cards.

ScartlettSole · 14/12/2023 17:35

Usernameundiscovered · 13/12/2023 18:19

I never understood the present buying fad, even as a child. As an adult friends and family who are teachers roll their eyes at the sheer amount of tat they get, and the wine and food gets shared out among everyone else. Home made food is instantly binned.

Class presents, while easier to be more generous, are too grand and should be declared if each child is contributing £5 and the class is over 30.

I appreciate my kids teachers but I'm not buying them a present every 12-14 weeks. A card at most then a plant donated to the school on leaving year 6.

Your teacher friends sound ungrateful to be honest. I would never instantly bin something, especially homemade!

Amana · 14/12/2023 17:51

A house plant. If a teacher didn’t want it at home, it could stay at school for everyone to share.

Quite reasonable to buy and my DC’s decorated a plant pot to put it in!

wishingiwas20something · 14/12/2023 18:15

We do John Lewis vouchers and M&S christmas biscuits, each family contributes £20, then the fund is split evenly between teacher and TA.

Coffeeismyfriend1 · 14/12/2023 18:18

To be honest I’m happy with wine or chocolate if people want to give me gifts or a book voucher.

I usually give wine or chocolate to my son’s teachers too. This year I have the added challenge that my son’s teacher is Jewish so I sought advice from a friend to make sure I get a nice kosher wine.

Parker231 · 14/12/2023 18:21

wishingiwas20something · 14/12/2023 18:15

We do John Lewis vouchers and M&S christmas biscuits, each family contributes £20, then the fund is split evenly between teacher and TA.

£20 for each child or £20 for all children in the same family in the school? It’s a lot - what if someone can’t afford £20?

Backtothe90ties · 14/12/2023 18:24

ScartlettSole · 14/12/2023 17:35

Your teacher friends sound ungrateful to be honest. I would never instantly bin something, especially homemade!

Show quote history

This. I cannot imagine any teacher just binning gifts. Everyone I have ever worked with is so grateful for the kindness from the families we work with.

Cards from children are my personal favourite. I put them all into a scrapbook to look back on if I’m having a tough time. However I appreciate anything given to me, even things I wouldn’t have chosen I would regift and that would save me money so it’s always hugely appreciated!

Bettie44 · 14/12/2023 19:00

Nothing is expected, but I'm always always excited to receive a Starbucks gift card or a nice box of Foxes/M&S biscuits!

wishingiwas20something · 14/12/2023 19:01

Parker231 · 14/12/2023 18:21

£20 for each child or £20 for all children in the same family in the school? It’s a lot - what if someone can’t afford £20?

Show quote history

£20 per child/family - people are invited to contribute- it isn’t mandatory!

lilmadmel · 14/12/2023 19:09

I’m perfectly happy with food related gifts but also for £10 I’ve had a costa voucher which was lovely! (Although a little overwhelming getting something more than a token)