She's just a waitress!

[Tilllly]

Am in restaurant attached to premier inn

That's what the man on table next to me, has just said to his (presumably) wife

She's just a waitress

WTAF! She's just spent ages going through the menu with them

I'm probably overreacting??? It's nothing to do with me but I feel really annoyed and want to say something

I'm sat here fuming. She's been lovely, I'm here alone and she's really looked after me

I don’t understand, what was the context? I’ve said, ‘He’s just an architect’, when there was an issue with the capacity of the dry risers and someone thought the architect could sort it.

So it's Wrong and Bad to say "she's just a waitress" but looking down on people for eating at a Beefeater is totally fine?

Hypocrites.

Whatever the reason, there is absolutely no need to say ‘she's just a waitress’.

He could have simply said ‘the waitress might not know’.

He’s implying that it’s because she’s a waitress, she won’t know.

I absolutely loved being a waitress - every single aspect.
There are a LOT of people who couldn’t hack being a waiter or waitress.
You’d think people sat in a restaurant eating and being served by waiting staff would realise the irony of that awful statement - ‘just a…’

Bet he would also retract his ‘just a waitress’ comment should he have choked on a fish bone and the waitress did the Heimlich manoeuvre and stopped him dying!

I was a waitress, while at uni. It is where I met some of my best friends. A doctor, a dentist, a vet and one who stayed a waitress nearly 20 years, but recently opened her own restaurant. Sometimes people are doing it to go elsewhere, sometimes it fits their other commitments. He is a dick.

You could just tell him he’s ‘just’ a wanker

A comment like this depends on the context it was said. If, like you said above, it was in response to something his wife has said about the menu, then I think it's quite probable it was a reasonable response as it could well have been along the lines of she's just a waitress, rather than the chef or manager etc - so there's no point complaining to her that the choice is terrible, the prices are too high or they should serve xyz etc. I'd be more inclined to see it as condescending if it hadn't been in said during a discussion about the menu.

A great ending well done 💐

Judgy much? Why are they "saddos" for eating at a Premier Inn? We used to live overseas, so when coming back to the UK and travelling all over the UK, we used to often stay at Premier Inns because they were cheap and clean and you knew what you were getting. We also used to eat at whatever restaurant was attached for ease. Food was usually unexciting but reasonable and reliable.

How you treat waitresses/cleaners says a lot about a person! I know I work in events!

You are being far more judgemental and superficial than him. He said something completely innocuous, for which you don't even know the context. And you're making a huge assumption based on his appearance.

I thought this was a reference to a Friends episode.

I've watched that show too much.

It sounds like he could've been sticking up for her!

You said she spent ages going through their order with them, so maybe his wife was asking too many questions and expecting her to have all the answers?

"She's just a waitress!" Could've been him saying cut her some slack, she's not a bloody chef.

God, I HATE the way we define people by their job. I’ve always thought of my job as just the stupid, boring, horrible thing I have to do to pay my bills. It means nothing to me, and certainly doesn’t define me.

I’m much more interested in people’s favourite books, films, paintings, albums, etc than what they do for money. For all he knows, that girl might be a brilliant singer or violin player or gymnast.

I get it all the time at work
"You can't do X, you're just a call centre"
Or when I do something "good girl"

Someone once asked me what qualifications I had, laughing down the phone that I probably didn't have any GCSEs and pushed and pushed until
I told him I had 10 GCSEs, a national diploma, A levels and a BA hons degree
He then hung up on me

@greenstems9

All true

Tho in my defence, I didn't see his shoes so my judgement isn't fully formed ;)

Gosh, you have behaved absolutely horrifically.
You eavesdropped on their conversation all evening, glared at them, made a big song and dance about how grateful you were, that you made sure they could hear, all because you just got a bad vibe from him, a complete stranger? And because heard one comment with absolutely no context?

Why can't people just mind their own business?

@christmaspaws

You've been called "good girl"

😱😨

I'd flip

I agree with your sentiment, but I think he would also then be justified in asking why you were listening into his conversation with his wife, and then spent several hours on your phone while your husband looked bored.

Sometimes you overhear stuff without listening in, and can do nice stuff without it being pure virtue-signalling. When I made my suggestions I was thinking more that the waitress might have overheard it and be hurt. Service workers can hear as well as everyone else can, you know.

There's so many ways in which 'she's just a waitress' could be a legit and non-snide answer to something his wife said.
But the OP has used her exocet observation skills to conclude that he 'looks the type,' so I'm sure she is fully justified in saying that he's 'definitely a knob'.

In fact I’d assume that it probably was a non-snide comment because, as you say, there are various non-snide explanations.

Someone going into a restaurant and commenting on waiters/waitresses ‘just’ being waiters or waitresses, as a critique of their career path, doesn’t really seem like something people do.

Fair point.

And I also just noticed that OP is alone at dinner tonight, and so my comments about her bored DH are inaccurate.

Everyone else in the restaurant is probably fascinated by OP's frantic screen bashing, before heading back to their room in the Premier Inn to check out what has been going on on Mumsnet tonight....... 😂

There's nothing wrong with the Premier Inn full English breakfast!!

Did she have chubby ankles?