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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour borrowing my electricity

202 replies

SuffolkQueen82 · 10/12/2023 18:55

So… I have a recluse neighbour, probably in her 60’s, we speak regularly and are neighbourly to the extent we’ll put each others bins out etc. Her electric sockets stopped working in her house 6 days ago and asked if we could run an extension lead so she can keep her phone charged, with the promise she’ll call an electrician the next day.

obviously we don’t want someone to be without power so we obliged. 2 days later she sees me
walking past, explains that she has an electrician coming and gives me £20 for the electric asking that we don’t unplug it yet. at this time I warn her I am going away with work and the house will be empty for a significant time during the day so it will need to be sorted before I leave as it’s a security risk.

2 days later still nothing I knock on her door yesterday evening to say I am away Monday and it needs sorting. She says the electrician is coming round today (Sunday) and it should be fixed. She then comes round 30 mins later to tell me the main electric has now tripped and my extension lead is her only
source of power. I mention getting a petrol generator as I can’t have a cable sticking out of an open window while I’m away.

she has been ignoring me all day today, I am leaving in the morning and will be unplugging the lead as I leave. I don’t want someone to be without power but she’s had nearly a week to sort this, I have told her. AIBU?!

I know for a fact her house is in a state of disrepair and her wiring is definitely not up to standard so the house most likely will need to be completely required, she doesn’t even have central heating or double glazed windows.

but:

  1. it’s a fire hazard as she could have a number of leads running from that 1 extension
  2. it’s a security risk, esp at Christmas when I have a lot of footfall in front of the house and the cable is visible.
  3. least importantly it’s plugged into the only socket free for our Christmas lights which has put a dampener on an already difficult Christmas season.
OP posts:
CrunchyCarrot · 12/12/2023 16:13

horseyhorsey17 · 12/12/2023 13:50

Is she a hoarder? It sounds like her home could be a fire risk. It might be worth having a quiet word with one of your local councillors. Living in a dark, unheated home full of cats and pigeons, with presumably no hot water either and being too scared of people to get it fixed, is no way to live, it sounds like she needs proper mental health support.

I absolutely agree with this! I think there's a lot of chaos inside that house.

Inkyblue123 · 12/12/2023 16:15

Unplug it and report her as a vulnerable person living without power.

CustardySergeant · 12/12/2023 16:18

All the posters telling the OP to "Unplug" - she did that yesterday morning.

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 12/12/2023 16:26

CustardySergeant · 12/12/2023 16:18

All the posters telling the OP to "Unplug" - she did that yesterday morning.

I don't know if the £20 that the neighbour gave was cash or cheque - if the latter, she could cancel that too whilst she's at it Grin

Roxy69 · 12/12/2023 16:53

JesusMaryAndJosephAndTheWeeDon · 10/12/2023 20:20

I would make a report to social services no power and a house in disrepair suggests that in some way she isn't coping and needs support

I think you should definitely do this as a kindness to her whether she likes it or not. It sounds like she's not coping and you never know, it might be a relief to her. No way could I cut her off and just leave without doing something to help.

Jackfrostnippingatmynose · 12/12/2023 17:09

Has her phone gone out as well as her electricity - she may be fibbing about calling them to fix? Or doesnt have the money to get it fixed?

We had a similar lovely neighbour whose phone and electricity went out. She refused to let any BT engineer or electrician into the house as she was ashamed of the state of it (she was a hoarder and diagnosed with early dementia) but had capacity, no relatives with POA and didnt want our offer of help. We rang social services, but in fact her situation didn't resolve until she tripped and broke her hip in her garden (luckily we heard her cry for help), the paramedics struggled to get her out through her hoarded house, and after they removed her to hospital they must have triggered social services as well. Someone came to clear enough of the property to enable her to return and got the electricity/phone sorted for her.

1mabon · 12/12/2023 17:57

Unplug this minute,, she's a chancer no matter her age, she knows exactly what she's doing.

CustardySergeant · 12/12/2023 18:08

1mabon · 12/12/2023 17:57

Unplug this minute,, she's a chancer no matter her age, she knows exactly what she's doing.

The OP can't unplug this minute as she went away yesterday morning and unplugged before she left.

Imisssleep2 · 12/12/2023 18:26

Yanbu, she does need to sort this, but I suspect when she first approached you she may have lost all power then not just sockets, unless you know if Def was just sockets. Maybe she hasn't got enough money to pay the bill and she has been cut off?
You Def can't leave her plugged in and leave a window open while away but it sounds like she needs help somehow. Most electricians I would like to think would make her a priority in her situation, I can't help thinking she hasn't asked someone as she doesnt have money to pay them.....

Lorralorr · 12/12/2023 18:32

yanbu except for the Christmas lights bit - you could easily plug in a two way adapter and plug in the extension cable and your lights.

but yeah you can’t leave window obviously open while you’re away.

agree it sounds like they can’t pay their bill or afford an electrician which is sad. Could you suggest they ring the electricity company to get help, or citizens advice or the council or something?

it’s not your responsibility but they need help and you’re their neighbour and sounds like they don’t have friends or family so in your shoes I’d see if I could advise them. But I’m a bit of a busybody like that!!

Lorralorr · 12/12/2023 18:35

HamBone · 10/12/2023 19:19

I wonder whether she’s been disconnected? I know that the situation has to be extreme for that to happen, but it’s possible.

Aside from the fact that it’s gone on too long, you really don’t have a choice about disconnecting the extension lead if you’re going away. As PP’s have said, it’s both a security risk and an electrical hazard. It would probably invalidate your house insurance if you had a break-in or a fire broke out.

She might just be on a prepayment meter and unable to top up

Lorralorr · 12/12/2023 18:38

Genuinely surprised that most people here would cut her off without even trying to understand the situation or offer any support! Hope none of these people ever need help from a neighbour!

Delia65 · 12/12/2023 19:47

Lorralorr · 12/12/2023 18:32

yanbu except for the Christmas lights bit - you could easily plug in a two way adapter and plug in the extension cable and your lights.

but yeah you can’t leave window obviously open while you’re away.

agree it sounds like they can’t pay their bill or afford an electrician which is sad. Could you suggest they ring the electricity company to get help, or citizens advice or the council or something?

it’s not your responsibility but they need help and you’re their neighbour and sounds like they don’t have friends or family so in your shoes I’d see if I could advise them. But I’m a bit of a busybody like that!!

And further overload an already potentially overloaded circuit? Terrible advice

gamerchick · 12/12/2023 20:27

Lorralorr · 12/12/2023 18:38

Genuinely surprised that most people here would cut her off without even trying to understand the situation or offer any support! Hope none of these people ever need help from a neighbour!

The OP did help, for nearly a week.

Lulu123450 · 12/12/2023 20:28

No, you are being reasonable. You were good enough to run that extension lead through in the first place. You definitely need to unplug it, it’s not like you didn’t explain this to her.

webs1991 · 12/12/2023 20:32

Unplug it right now. You’ve done enough some people just take advantage

whatchagonnado · 12/12/2023 20:36

webs1991 · 12/12/2023 20:32

Unplug it right now. You’ve done enough some people just take advantage

Yep, OP did that yesterday. Angry
Why not read even a little bit of the thread before you comment?

Lorralorr · 13/12/2023 17:22

Delia65 · 12/12/2023 19:47

And further overload an already potentially overloaded circuit? Terrible advice

Show quote history

Yeah I’m not saying do it! Just that the Christmas lights bit is not the reason not to!

Lorralorr · 13/12/2023 17:34

gamerchick · 12/12/2023 20:27

The OP did help, for nearly a week.

Show quote history

Yeah the OP did good. It’s everyone else here that would cut her off without a how are you or can I search for a phone number for you so you can get some advice. Or even just a bit of sympathy while unplugging!

maisiebennett · 13/12/2023 17:41

Turn it off , if anything happens she will unplug it and deny responsibility you have been more than generous.

happyinherts · 13/12/2023 21:59

I do wish people would learn to read before commenting. So annoying.

Baba197 · 14/12/2023 04:48

YANBU! Unplug now, this is very dangerous as prob has several other leads running from that one extension lead

Seaglass7 · 14/12/2023 06:00

Stop the cheque!

BoredofBlonde · 14/12/2023 06:08

Baba197 · 14/12/2023 04:48

YANBU! Unplug now, this is very dangerous as prob has several other leads running from that one extension lead

Are you thick having a laugh??

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 14/12/2023 07:41

OP, you definitely need to make sure you needlessly plug it in again - just so that you can follow all of the latter sage advice on here, telling you to unplug it right now...

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