Neighbour borrowing my electricity

[SuffolkQueen82]

So… I have a recluse neighbour, probably in her 60’s, we speak regularly and are neighbourly to the extent we’ll put each others bins out etc. Her electric sockets stopped working in her house 6 days ago and asked if we could run an extension lead so she can keep her phone charged, with the promise she’ll call an electrician the next day.

obviously we don’t want someone to be without power so we obliged. 2 days later she sees me
walking past, explains that she has an electrician coming and gives me £20 for the electric asking that we don’t unplug it yet. at this time I warn her I am going away with work and the house will be empty for a significant time during the day so it will need to be sorted before I leave as it’s a security risk.

2 days later still nothing I knock on her door yesterday evening to say I am away Monday and it needs sorting. She says the electrician is coming round today (Sunday) and it should be fixed. She then comes round 30 mins later to tell me the main electric has now tripped and my extension lead is her only
source of power. I mention getting a petrol generator as I can’t have a cable sticking out of an open window while I’m away.

she has been ignoring me all day today, I am leaving in the morning and will be unplugging the lead as I leave. I don’t want someone to be without power but she’s had nearly a week to sort this, I have told her. AIBU?!

I know for a fact her house is in a state of disrepair and her wiring is definitely not up to standard so the house most likely will need to be completely required, she doesn’t even have central heating or double glazed windows.

but:

1. it’s a fire hazard as she could have a number of leads running from that 1 extension
2. it’s a security risk, esp at Christmas when I have a lot of footfall in front of the house and the cable is visible.
3. least importantly it’s plugged into the only socket free for our Christmas lights which has put a dampener on an already difficult Christmas season.

I think you've been very helpful. Have you unplugged yet? I would unplug before bed and post the plug through the letterbox and lock my window.

Maybe another neighbour can help out and lend their electricity for a while? It's not all up to you.

She’s been cut off, that’s my guess.

Whether she has MH she is still fibbing about an electrician coming on a Sunday.

She may well be; but if she does have MH problems, she could be living in her own reality and believing what she tells you.

My DGM had lifelong MH issues and heard voices, and she would frequently tell you things that were obviously ridiculous, but she wasn't deliberately lying as such; she was telling you 'her truth', which she genuinely believed.

What a shame, poor old lady, but you cannot possibly leave a window open. Two local small independent businesses here have been broken into overnight, Christmas is an odd time and everyone needs to be vigilant.

I hope you phone Adult social services as an above poster suggested. God knows what she might resort to if this isn’t fixed.

It’s 60s really seen as “elderly”? The people I know in their 60s are perfectly competent. I would charge up a phone power bank to give her extra power but unplug the power.

She may have called and when they asked if she had any power she said yes (cause she was taking yours) so has been considered low priority

You know she's got other extensions plugged into that OP. She sounds like she's in a desperate state and will now ignore you hoping you'll just go away. It sounds as if she needs proper help overall for her own sake. You feel like you've done her a kindness, but really it's just prolonging what must be a miserable situation for her.

She has an outside toilet?!?! OP your username says Suffolk. Is your neighbor in a run down cottage style home? I have been mortified at how run down and bare some of them are inside. It’s like stepping back to the 40s!

I fear this may be the tip of the iceberg. I wouldn’t be surprised if the house was hoarded and she’s too embarrassed to have people in. Or she just can’t face the thought of strangers coming into her home. Obviously you need to unplug before you go. If it isn’t resolved when you get back maybe some support with finding an electrician, or if it comes to it, a call to social services. But you can’t keep on feeding her electricity needs.

She needs help, not an extension lead.

I know that you are trying to be kind but it’s incredibly dangerous for both of you.

I’m in Suffolk and while everyone has an indoor toilet it’s not unusual to have an outdoor one too, my last house did.

I really think you should cut it off immediately due to fire risk. Text her and say “I’m really sorry I am going to have to unplug and lock my window tonight before I go to bed” and do exactly that.

sockets don’t all stop working unless there is a serious fault or you’re cut off.

did you ask her about the (Sunday) sparky and what he/she had said?

@SuffolkQueen82

I would have done the same as you. No one wants to live in disrepair without electricity. She’s obviously fallen in hard times. I don’t think she’s taken you for a ride or is a chancer. You’ve done her a good deed, but she needs to get things sorted and not at the expense of your security.

I’d be very concerned what she’s actually got plugged into the extension lead, maybe an electric heater that’s literally eating your electricity and pushing your bill up really high

And talking from experience, social services will do fuck all!

Elderly relative, no heating, no hot water, rats, hoarding, mould, damp, most electrics not working, and fuck all done!

There is obviously more going on. Someone without MH or very vulnerable doesn't wait nearly a week to sort something like this. I agree with previous PP who suggest phoning SS or police for a welfare check. This is an old lady with no power for a week who hasn't seemed to have called an electrician. She obviously needs some help.

Does she have children who visit? If so are they aware? They might be another port of call and probably something SS may ask and try to contact them.

Strange question, is she a widow? Just when DH's grandad died his grandma really struggled with basic maintenance and calling people up to fix things as that was always "John's job". Even today BIL snd DH are the ones arranging maintence for her and she has been a widow for nearly 10 years now. Grandma is in her late 80s though, whereas this is a lady in her 60s.

Definitely unplug it. I would not be able to sleep with the window open tonight, you’re asking to be burgled.
As well as unplugging it for all kinds of safety, I would phone the councils emergency line tomorrow to report a concern for welfare so they check on her whilst you are away. No indoor plumbing, no electricity is not going to end well very quickly. Also she’s more likely to have open fires now/oil lamps/electrics plugged into 20 extensions and when she goes up in flames so will your house sadly.

Would contacting Age Concern be better than Social Services?

You don't know what she has plugged into this, she probably has no idea about safe loadings. You are taking a serious fire risk, quite apart from invalidating your insurance. You MUST disconnect it.

You cannot be serious. The amount of friends I know, who have been burgled through a slightly open window. One was the attic room window!!! I would never leave a window open, while you're away. Unplug it, and go away. Absolutely do not reconnect it afterward. Tell her, she has to get it fixed because it's not a permanent solution. It's s also a fire hazard to have that many devices connected to your electrical circuit.

Unplug it in the morning but maybe consider contacting your local adult social care/safeguarding team to put her on their radar. They may be aware of her already or it might be that she needs some support to get this sorted.

If her wiring is dodgy and you’re not detached add a few more smoke alarms.

Oh, her living arrangements sound concerning. She seems very vulnerable. Should you talk to your local Adult Social Care team maybe?

@SuffolkQueen82

Here is the answer!

UNPLUG NOW!