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Original poster

Banging on the door of the Accessible Toilet

416 replies

HunterHearstHelmsley · 10/12/2023 09:30

Why do people do this?!

I've just used the accessible toilet (I need to use the accessible toilet). I'd barely sat down and someone started banging on the door. I wasn't in there an unreasonable amount of time - probably about 30 seconds when the door banging started and 3 minutes overall. I was in there because I needed to be, banging on the door isn't going to make me quicker. If someone was taking the piss, it'd probably make them stay longer!

It's not the first time it's happened but it's so frustrating. It happened a few weeks ago also, that time was a woman wanting to use the baby change... the baby change wasn't even in the accessible loo!

It's really annoyed me this morning, it's not something I've noticed when using non-accesible toilets so I think it's just an accessible loo thing. But whyyyy?! I can't go faster 😩

OP posts:
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Justfinking · 10/12/2023 17:41

ememem84 · 10/12/2023 12:12

My office has one male toilet and one female toilet. Both are also accessible.

if I’m not meant to use the accessible toilet how on earth am I meant to go to the toilet when I’m at work?

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Well obviously you would use that if it's the only toilet!

WiddlinDiddlin · 10/12/2023 17:53

Coconutter24 · 10/12/2023 09:48

Why would you purposely rattle the handle, how rude! People don’t go to accessible toilets to hang out they go because they need to use it, someone could maybe take a few more minutes than you’d like due to their disability, they don’t need people rattling handles to hurry them along

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Lots of accessible toilets are locked all the time.

However people with their own RADAR key can access them without asking for a key.

So when I come to use the toilet, I do not know if it is locked because its locked, or locked because theres actually someone in there using the key they've had to go ask for, or their own key.

Many accessible toilets also have duff locks that show occupied when they're vacant (common as a result of stores setting up the locks wrong on purpose so its easier for them to access. Set up correctly they should not unlock with a key if someone has locked it from the inside, you have to use a screwdriver or a coin)

I'd rather rattle the handle and see if theres someone in there, then wait, than sit like a fucking lemon, legs crossed trying not to piss my pants only to find out that there was no one in there in the first place!

Coconutter24 · 10/12/2023 18:03

WiddlinDiddlin · 10/12/2023 17:53

Lots of accessible toilets are locked all the time.

However people with their own RADAR key can access them without asking for a key.

So when I come to use the toilet, I do not know if it is locked because its locked, or locked because theres actually someone in there using the key they've had to go ask for, or their own key.

Many accessible toilets also have duff locks that show occupied when they're vacant (common as a result of stores setting up the locks wrong on purpose so its easier for them to access. Set up correctly they should not unlock with a key if someone has locked it from the inside, you have to use a screwdriver or a coin)

I'd rather rattle the handle and see if theres someone in there, then wait, than sit like a fucking lemon, legs crossed trying not to piss my pants only to find out that there was no one in there in the first place!

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You might rather rattle the handle but that seems rude, wouldn’t it be more polite to give a little knock and a hello is anyone in there. For the person on the inside the handle rattling might just panic them

Coconutter24 · 10/12/2023 18:04

Hereforthebunfights · 10/12/2023 14:08

So where do disabled people change their babies?

Baby change?

FuckinghellthatsUnbelievable · 10/12/2023 18:08

pam290358 · 10/12/2023 16:11

I know it was tongue in cheek but you make a good point. I think if you’re going to put changing facilities within accessible toilets, it’s a good idea to make them suitable for changing an adult. Would be a lot easier for those people with stomas and incontinence issues.

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In my LA we’ve actually managed to increase number of changing places toilets with changing table suitable for adults. There’s an interactive map to find a changing place toilet on this website.

https://www.changing-places.org/

Changing Places Toilets

https://www.changing-places.org/

pam290358 · 10/12/2023 18:09

Coconutter24 · 10/12/2023 18:04

Baby change?

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Not always successful as it’s not specifically designed for those with disabilities. Dedicated baby change facilities would be good in accessible toilets as it would address a clear need.

Coconutter24 · 10/12/2023 18:14

pam290358 · 10/12/2023 18:09

Not always successful as it’s not specifically designed for those with disabilities. Dedicated baby change facilities would be good in accessible toilets as it would address a clear need.

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baby change facilities in the accessible toilet (which I have seen in some) would be the best way but then you’d also have people not wanting to queue for baby change so jump in the accessible if it’s free

DRS1970 · 10/12/2023 18:29

This happened to me once too. I have mobility issues, so I am just as entitled to use the accessible toilet as anyone else. So I got my phone out and did a crossword until they stopped.

mollypuss1 · 10/12/2023 18:32

Rosscameasdoody · 10/12/2023 13:12

Except that it bears no relation to what was actually said.

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Yes it does. You said you get frustrated by people clearly taking the piss. The poster explained that she has a genuine reason to use the toilet but still gets accused of taking the piss. Your attitude is not as open minded as you think it is.

pam290358 · 10/12/2023 18:53

mollypuss1 · 10/12/2023 18:32

Yes it does. You said you get frustrated by people clearly taking the piss. The poster explained that she has a genuine reason to use the toilet but still gets accused of taking the piss. Your attitude is not as open minded as you think it is.

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I read all of the posts from this user and this is not what I took from them at all. They weren’t having a go at genuinely disabled people/those with hidden disabilities. They were simply pointing out that these facilities get abused. They actually gave examples of the behaviour they’d experienced and it was nothing to do with judging someone on their appearance, more the behaviour they’d witnessed. Or do you think it’s unacceptable to call someone out for using the accessible toilets to smoke weed ? Or a quick snog ? If the behaviour suggests abuse why is it not OK to challenge someone ? Surely if they have a hidden disability they’ll declare it. And if the other poster has a genuine reason to be using the toilet and still gets accused of abuse, that’s no reason not to call out the piss takers. We’ve all been there at some point in our lives. Attacking other disabled people for their opinions sadly doesn’t surprise me on MN.

Lovelysausagedogscrumpy · 10/12/2023 18:57

mollypuss1 · 10/12/2023 18:32

Yes it does. You said you get frustrated by people clearly taking the piss. The poster explained that she has a genuine reason to use the toilet but still gets accused of taking the piss. Your attitude is not as open minded as you think it is.

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Calling out a poster who is a disabled wheelchair user for recounting personal experience of people abusing these facilities and at the same time acknowledging that it’s difficult to challenge them because you don’t know if they have a hidden disability. And calling them closed minded to the problems of disabled people when they’re disabled themselves. Ok then. The level of reading and comprehension skills on MN has hit a new low on this thread.

kaboomy · 10/12/2023 19:34

@Bigstones Yes, it’s one of the stupid things about accessible toilets- you don’t know if it’s locked because it’s empty or because someone is in there… I don’t knock/bang in case I freak out the person in there but I do open it with my radar key very slowly and make it obvious I’m there so if there is someone in there they have chance to yell!
How is knocking more likely to cause a freak out than someone actually opening the door. Regardless of how slowly I would be WAAAAAAYY more freaked out by the door actually starting to open. Knock. It's much more considerate.

LadyKenya · 10/12/2023 19:35

DRS1970 · 10/12/2023 18:29

This happened to me once too. I have mobility issues, so I am just as entitled to use the accessible toilet as anyone else. So I got my phone out and did a crossword until they stopped.

Good for you, if you have nothing better to do with your timeHmm

MrsClatterbuck · 10/12/2023 19:51

Smartiepants79 · 10/12/2023 09:41

I only ever do it in ordinary toilets and when there is a queue going out the door and no one has gone in or out for several minutes. It’s often leads to me finding that there wasn’t even anyone in there in the first place! So I think I’ll use my judgement and do it when I feel it’s appropriate.

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You wouldn't like me then. I have IBS plus I'm on medication which exacerbates it. When I need to go I need to go. I do usually get a warning sign of a crampy stomach but I sometimes do take longer and don't want to exit the cubicle and then have to go back in again. Believe you me it's not a very pleasant way to live on high alert. I sometimes don't take my meds if I have a special event like a wedding.
Someone banging on the door would really piss me off as it is already a stressful situation.

kaboomy · 10/12/2023 19:52

MeMySonAnd1 · 10/12/2023 11:14

Going on a tangent….

I think nappy changing areas should be separated from toilet and definitely not put in disabled toilets.

I remember going into a Morrisons that had just one single toilet. A couple with a baby and a two year old got in there when there was already a queue of old people behind them and a man in a wheelchair and spent half an hour there doing I don’t know what, it was infuriating. I understand that a young child may need some cajoling to use the toilet but leaving 5 elderly people and a disabled one waiting for half an hour was fucking selfish whatever way you see it.

What else were they supposed to do? You say there was only one toilet? The were obviously having some issue as no family would gather in a public loo for any time if not necessary.

mollypuss1 · 10/12/2023 20:11

pam290358 · 10/12/2023 18:53

I read all of the posts from this user and this is not what I took from them at all. They weren’t having a go at genuinely disabled people/those with hidden disabilities. They were simply pointing out that these facilities get abused. They actually gave examples of the behaviour they’d experienced and it was nothing to do with judging someone on their appearance, more the behaviour they’d witnessed. Or do you think it’s unacceptable to call someone out for using the accessible toilets to smoke weed ? Or a quick snog ? If the behaviour suggests abuse why is it not OK to challenge someone ? Surely if they have a hidden disability they’ll declare it. And if the other poster has a genuine reason to be using the toilet and still gets accused of abuse, that’s no reason not to call out the piss takers. We’ve all been there at some point in our lives. Attacking other disabled people for their opinions sadly doesn’t surprise me on MN.

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They gave examples of behaviour AFTER the post I was referring to. And no, if someone has a hidden disability they shouldn’t have to declare it as they shouldn’t be called out on it to begin with.

Kendodd · 10/12/2023 20:20

mollypuss1 · 10/12/2023 20:11

They gave examples of behaviour AFTER the post I was referring to. And no, if someone has a hidden disability they shouldn’t have to declare it as they shouldn’t be called out on it to begin with.

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People with hidden disablities getting abuse for using the accessable toilet is clearly a problem though as you often see signs on toilet doors about it.

mollypuss1 · 10/12/2023 20:31

Lovelysausagedogscrumpy · 10/12/2023 18:57

Calling out a poster who is a disabled wheelchair user for recounting personal experience of people abusing these facilities and at the same time acknowledging that it’s difficult to challenge them because you don’t know if they have a hidden disability. And calling them closed minded to the problems of disabled people when they’re disabled themselves. Ok then. The level of reading and comprehension skills on MN has hit a new low on this thread.

Edited
Show quote history

Again, not what happened. The post you have quoted referred to comments made before any personal experience was recounted. Also, never said they were closed minded to the problems of disabled people, simply that they were not as open minded as they think they are. You are correct that the reading and comprehension skills have hit a new low though.

kaboomy · 10/12/2023 21:15

@mollypuss1 They gave examples of behaviour AFTER the post I was referring to. And no, if someone has a hidden disability they shouldn’t have to declare it as they shouldn’t be called out on it to begin with.

Agree. No one using an accessible toilet should be called out ever.

justasking111 · 10/12/2023 21:34

I just remembered our big Lidl has a loo at the front of the store it's marked M/F /disabled. So is an access toilet for all .

Longleggedgiraffe · 10/12/2023 21:37

This happened to me once. I was so annoyed I just yelled out "I'll be out when I'm finished." She gave me a glare ehen I came out and I just glared at her back.

beanontoast · 10/12/2023 21:40

I have a radar key and people banging on the door used to stress me out, these days I totally ignore it. I use that toilet for a reason, I’m not going to hurry myself at my own discomfort for some aggressive weirdo lurking outside. Half the time when I have hurried up it’s ended up being a Mum wanting to change her baby and idgaf about that, I never used accessible toilets to change my own kids even if it meant waiting or those toilets were free so the aggro Mums can piss all the way off.

FrillyGoatFluff · 10/12/2023 22:53

I have a baby in a pram - I admit to using the disabled cubicles on occasion when I'm out with her alone. Not something I have ever done pre-baby, or do if I have anyone with me, but public loos are spectacularly badly designed for logical use.

We're in a city centre and toilets are so tiny in shops/cafes etc, the only options are leaving the pram outside the loo 'room', and taking her in with me (which I have done on occasion and was easier when she was tiny, not so much now she's bigger), but panicked the entire time about coming out to a stolen pram, or wedging the pram as far into a cubicle as I can, thus leaving the door wide open while I pee - not ideal for me or anyone else in the ladies.

I'm lucky that I have a single pram, twin parents don't have the wedging option, or the pee-ing with babies option.

The changing tables in a separate room is the best plan, but for gods sake put a loo in there for parents too!

.

kaboomy · 10/12/2023 23:13

That's a point. Double prams. No one is going to leave their two babies outside a regular toilet

Bigstones · 10/12/2023 23:21

ememem84 · 10/12/2023 15:55

I was responding to a poster who said that no one should ever use accessible toilets unless they are disabled. Obviously I use the toilets at work. I’m just pointing out the fact that others were told they should never use them.

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Yes, but that was directed at a poster who was saying that she uses the accessible toilet if she doesn’t fancy queuing. No one in their right mind thinks (or has said) that you should go all day at work without peeing.

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