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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What has life taught you?

117 replies

Lifelessonstoremember · 09/12/2023 12:51

My life hasn't gone the way I hoped it would.

What have you learned about life - how to manage suffering and how to be happy?

OP posts:
Original poster
Lifelessonstoremember · 09/12/2023 16:26

Wise words. Thanks all. Please keep them coming.

OP posts:
ButterCupPie · 09/12/2023 16:30

Fiftyvines · 09/12/2023 15:00

Dance to the beat of your own drum. Live life the way you want to, you only get one!

How do you dance and beat a drum at the same time? 😜Sounds like fun though.

Needahandholdplease2023 · 09/12/2023 16:35

My life has been torn apart in the last 6 years. I could either give in or keep going. Lost my dad at 23, then 4 babies then had my beautiful 2 children. Both seriously ill in hospital and close to death, lost my grandad and my dog who was only 6. Life goes on sadly, yes I've got ptsd and bouts of anxiety and depression but my mindset has got me through I'm just grateful for my family and having a warm house filled with love. Life is shit but also very short! I appreciate the 23 years I got with my dad because some people don't even get that long.

Here for a good time not a long time! (My dad lived by this)

Been positive even in the darkest days and just keep going

greencheetah · 09/12/2023 16:38

I have learned that some of us are far happier living single lives and that’s OK.

That consumerism is a huge con. The biggest of all being alcohol.

Counting your blessings can counteract most pain.

LoveStHelier · 09/12/2023 16:40

If they judge you, they don’t know you.
be kind to yourself even if you find it hard
people can be vile and it’s them not you

Babetti · 09/12/2023 17:10

Don't keep anything for best. Wear the lovely dress, drink the good wine, light the fancy candle.

Aim for just enough. You don't always need more and more.

Slightly connected - leave the party on a high. This is usually around midnight and before it starts to get messy.

Pudmyboy · 09/12/2023 17:15

LoveStHelier · 09/12/2023 16:40

If they judge you, they don’t know you.
be kind to yourself even if you find it hard
people can be vile and it’s them not you

Such a good point: if they judge you they don't know you : thanks for this!

Yousay55 · 09/12/2023 17:16

Trust absolutely no one. Sadly.

Allfur · 09/12/2023 17:18

I'm here for a good time and a long time

ManchesterLu · 09/12/2023 17:19

It's all very well having dreams, but don't spend so much energy working towards your dreams that you forget to enjoy the days you're actually living here and now.

AllAroundMyCat · 09/12/2023 17:19

WinterParakeets
Not everyone likes you and that is absolutely fine. I used to be a people pleaser, desperate to be liked. Now I don't give a damn and am much happier.

This.
Took me nearly 60 years to realise this.
Now my life is fine and dandy.

itsgettingweird · 09/12/2023 17:19

That what doesn't break you makes you stronger.

itsgettingweird · 09/12/2023 17:20

Itsenough4now · 09/12/2023 13:41

Everyone is so busy picking sides, no one is actually solving the problem at hand!

Yes - this one is spot on

manipulatrice · 09/12/2023 17:23

That soldering on comes to a head and at some point you have to have a wobble. It's ok to not be ok.

RosaElize · 09/12/2023 17:24

This is a wonderful thread.

  • you will look back on photos of yourself in 15 year’s time and see your own beauty and youth so vividly.
  • your children are only little once, reconnect with what felt magic to you at that age and give it back to them
  • you are replaceable in every single place you will ever work
  • trust the continuity and rhythm of nature and, like an old friend, visit it when you want to feel yourself again
  • it is so much easier to like yourself when you live with integrity, even if nobody applauds you for it
  • when everything feels bleak, remember whatever art you loved as a child- films, colouring, crafting- reconnect with it and be happier
wizzywig · 09/12/2023 17:26

People in helpful caring jobs may not be helpful or caring but are using it to bully vulnerable people

Scottishskifun · 09/12/2023 17:26

That you can't control things and whilst it's great to have aims also actually enjoying your life in the moment rather then always looking at someone else or back to how times were is pointless and depressing! (Caveat I don't mean putting up with abuse or a shitty relationship etc!)

Dweetfidilove · 09/12/2023 17:28

Even in my struggles, life is good. I have much to be thankful for.

It’s okay to be vulnerable- no one comes to the aid of the strong.

AllGoneToPott · 09/12/2023 17:28

It's not the most intelligent that are successful, it's the ones that can adapt to whatever life throws at them.
Don't expect life to go your way, it wont, life has a will of its own and couldn't give a toss 're your dreams and goals. Learn to go with the flow.
We often spend so long focusing on what we haven't got we forget to enjoy what we already have.
It's never about your circumstances, but your mindset.

GreyCarpet · 09/12/2023 17:30

Two seconds of bravery is all it takes to step through the door, post the application, say hi to a stranger, agree to step out of your comfort zone...

Whatever it is, two seconds of bravery is all it takes.

GreyCarpet · 09/12/2023 17:31

Oh, and everyone can sing.

Some sound sweeter than others but, if you have a voice, you can sing.

Do it often. It really is good for you

Raspberrymoon49 · 09/12/2023 17:34

There’s so much corruption and suffering worldwide that it’s difficult not to become bitter and cynical, try to nurture your space and those who are in it, make your little place on Earth safe and full of love

piscofrisco · 09/12/2023 17:38

Life is one big wheel of fortune.You will be alternatively up then down at the bottom. But it always turns again no matter which end you're at. It doesn't always turn fast, but it always turns in the end.

LakeTiticaca · 09/12/2023 17:41

Dont put other people before yourself, unless you gave birth to them

enchantedsquirrelwood · 09/12/2023 17:43

Keep a sense of proportion. Things are annoying and it's fine to be annoyed over small things.

But think about if it will still annoy you tomorrow/next week/next year and put it out of your mind.

And remember none of it will matter when you are dead which I know is a nihilistic viewpoint but it does help to get over annoying stuff at times!