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Original poster

What has life taught you?

117 replies

Lifelessonstoremember · 09/12/2023 12:51

My life hasn't gone the way I hoped it would.

What have you learned about life - how to manage suffering and how to be happy?

OP posts:
teaandtoastwithmarmite · 09/12/2023 14:09

Comparison is the thief of joy. Do what makes you happy and treat others how you would like to be treated. All cliches but true.

RobertaFirmino · 09/12/2023 14:15

You can only ever rely on yourself.

Happyhappyeveryday · 09/12/2023 14:17

The older you get, the more you appreciate your female friends and the more you support each other. Also, only spend time with those that make you feel comfortable, supported and contented. Lose the others.

Justcallmebebes · 09/12/2023 14:19

You have to create your own happiness, build strong relationships and don't hold on to hate or resentment

Museum10662 · 09/12/2023 14:25

most of the time everyone wants the title of boss or taking credit for x suggestion or project but then sometimes when it does not go as they thought then rather than saying my bad its everyone elses fault

plumtreebroke · 09/12/2023 14:25

You are not indispensable at work, if you weren't there they would manage. Having spent years always doing everything for work to the detriment of my life and family. I wish I could do it again with much more balance.

Museum10662 · 09/12/2023 14:26

and from here, years spent in a marriage does not mean a faithful partner or a lasting marriage as whether its 2 years or 20 + the marriages can still go pickles.

Octavia64 · 09/12/2023 14:27

People change, and you can't always rely on them so you should always have a plan B.

HoneyButterPopcorn · 09/12/2023 14:28

It’s not fair and doesn’t make sense.

WinterParakeets · 09/12/2023 14:29

Op, one other thing I realised about suffering - a real light bulb moment.

I was going through a terrible time and was trying to do things that are supposed to be uplifting, like walking in nature. I remember coming back from a walk and as I neared the house, the weight of awful stuff I had to deal with crept back, and I thought: what was the point of that? It didn't help. I now feel just as bad as I did.

Then I realised that on the walk itself, I felt better for a short time. It didn't cure my mood as I hoped it would, but it gave me a break from feeling wretched 24/7. So all I had to do is keep adding more and more breaks from feeling awful into everyday life and eventually they will outnumber the hours I feel bad and I'll be coping.

That really helps during bad times.

Lndnmummy · 09/12/2023 14:30

That life is about the journey, not the end goal. Its so easy to get caught up in the end destination buy the house, the promotion, having a child, being a size 10, buying a bigger house. But if you enjoy the journey (the work you do, the relationship you have, making the baby, enjoy eating healthy and look after yourself) then the end result will come. If we constantly chase the outcomes, life pass us by.

reallyfedup123 · 09/12/2023 14:30

Amazing thread

BabyYoshke · 09/12/2023 14:31
  1. Wonderful things can happen when you step outside
  2. You never know what’s around the corner
PinkArt · 09/12/2023 14:31

You can't control what other people do but you can control how you react to it.
That one's been a bit of a game changer for me, especially when people haven't behaved how I would in a situation.

Qwerty556 · 09/12/2023 14:33

Goldfish don't like jelly.

I learnt that key life lesson when I was 4 and in the 51 years since nothing has happened to change my mind.

Also you can often judge the quality of a person by how they treat people who are of no use to them.

Workworkandmoreworknow · 09/12/2023 14:33

Shit happens. What matters is managing it.

thesixleggedpsychopathonthetrain · 09/12/2023 14:33

Don't expect life to be fair and don't complain when it isn't.

Bireadwhatiread · 09/12/2023 14:35

Everyone hurts you in one way or another- don't expect too much
don't badmouth people
work harder than everyone else
fight as hard as you can for the things you want and never give up
don't allow yourself the luxury of self pity
this is a competitive situation

ButterCupPie · 09/12/2023 14:36

I have learned that many of the things I thought were important when I was younger, aren't, and vice versa. Also that beauty and handsomeness are very often only skin deep.

SerenityNowInsanityLater · 09/12/2023 14:39

I’m a person of faith but you don’t have to be one yourself to apply this thought to the living day but… I start each morning with the prayer, Blessed be this day for it has been made and given by the Lord.

Day by day. Take it day by day.
We sit with sorrow on our left and joy on our right. In the middle we find our stillness in the wild sea that is the human experience. Find that stillness. Allow grief to show you meaning and through it, you will find love and remember your courage.

Know what you want and what you need- accept that they will likely be different from one another. Do what you can but do it with meaning. Live in truth. Sweep your side of the street. Be nice to people. You get what give. But give assholes the big swerve.

And at the end of it all…
”What will survive us is love.”
So try and be loving. It’s too easy to submit to cynicism. Show suffering that you’re strong enough to remain loving, despite the hard knocks and dickheads that will knock our spirits around a bit in life.

Museum10662 · 09/12/2023 14:40

people are willing to offer future favor's when they need a favor, but then in practice theres usually reasons they cannot return the favor, so usually its better to get the favor completed when they want there favor

ImNotReallySpartacus · 09/12/2023 14:42

Nobody ever really knows another person.

Museum10662 · 09/12/2023 14:44

ImNotReallySpartacus · 09/12/2023 14:42

Nobody ever really knows another person.

very true they can be all singing all dancing then its oh they lived a secret life or a different identity etc

CaineRaine · 09/12/2023 14:45

Everything is a phase - good phases end but so do bad phases.

IvorTheEngineDriver · 09/12/2023 14:47

In the long run, there is very, very little that actually matters.

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